Helping Ederly Parents from a Distance: Lessons Learned

[Peasie]

this is a very good thread and something I am becoming increasingly worried about. I have a question on bank accounts if anyone know the answer. If you get put on your parents bank/investments accounts in JA do you have to file taxes on that in the US even though you not getting no money? They want to do that so I don't have to fight nobody when them dead, but I also fraid of IRS so I tell them just make the will!

Just remembered something else. This happened to me last week in Jamaica. Check this ... even with a POA, I still would not have access to my mother's investments. This was the latest news I got from a bank investment adviser in Jamaica. Not even if it states so in her Will. Yah hear mi? Chrrps. Jamaica's financial laws yuhsi

So my name is on the investments now. So I have to pay IRS taxes. Catch-22 \0/. But paying taxes is the lesser evil than say, having the bank freeze her assets and then getting an Act of Parliament to get her investments to her children!

Think I'm going to consult with the lawyer about this

[Reggae plus]

Good idea to get the legal opinion. Sounds kinda 'fishy' to me. Something's not right.

[Gen]

Well, ask yourself. Could you go to the yard bank, withdraw any amount from the account(s) and use as you see fit ? i.e. could you take cash and buy a fur coat, house, use to supplement your income here ?

OK. Here's what I did.

I am not on my mother's bank accounts. However, I am her legal Power of Attorney (POA) which in Jamaica governs more financial matters than anything else. The Jamaican bank, BNSJ, has a copy of this POA as well as copies of my IDs (US passport and driver's license). The POA allows me to act on her financial behalf in all matters: investment, withdrawal, paying taxes, etc. I can (and do) go the BNSJ and withdraw funds, move things around, etc. When I do banking on behalf of my mother, I have to show them my IDs.

To get a POA in Jamaica you have to have a lawyer draw it up and it has to be filed with some court and some Stamp Duty must be applied.

So I don't think I have "signature authority" per IRS of my mother's Jamaican bank accounts, right Gen?

[Peasie]

[Gen]

ok, suh yuh a gwaan good then

Not confusing gen that's how it was explained to me

[Peasie]

Good idea to get the legal opinion. Sounds kinda 'fishy' to me. Something's not right.

And another thing ... these bank people most times doan know B from bullfoot

[seemiyah]

Hmmm....lots of good info to consider thanks folks.

What other advice oonu have? I realize I need more of their neighbors numbers, I only have one person, and extended family not that close if you need someone to check in case of emergency.

[Peasie]

Hmmm....lots of good info to consider thanks folks.

What other advice oonu have? I realize I need more of their neighbors numbers, I only have one person, and extended family not that close if you need someone to check in case of emergency.

1. Are they active members in a church? Worship there for a long time? Get the phone number and email of the pastor or someone in the Church who looks out for your parents.
2. What about their friends? My mother and her best friend call each other every day to talk bout soap opera, who dead, chickv, politics, etc. I have her friend's phone number and the daughter's email. We touch base every now and then to talk about each other's mother.
3. How is their health as far as being mobile? Can they get around OK around the house and yard?
4. What about their mental acuity?
5. How do they pay their expenses? Check? Cash? Online? Bank card? Credit card?

I can tell you stories!

[MsExced]

Great thread peasie, my parent's are here so things on this end straight. Is the blasted house a Jamaica that we all wish he would just sell

[seemiyah]

1. They (mother) worship at TV church so no pastor to call
2. Dem talk to the neighbors so that is why I need the numbers, I get mi antisocial behavior from them
3. Their health now is fine, father still drives and my mother yard work put me to shame, I ask her to come rake mi leaves and I was not joking
4. Dem still talk whole heap a sense and we talk every day
5. Mi no know, I know my father drive go pay things

right now there really isn't any concerns but they in their 70s so they not staying "young" forever.

tell mi the stories

[UKBlackLady]

Great thread peasie, my parent's are here so things on this end straight. Is the blasted house a Jamaica that we all wish he would just sell

This right here is my problem.

My mother is in the UK but there is the house and land in Jamaica. My mother has left the title in Jamaica with her niece (!) because she is acting landlord on behalf of my mother. So, um... What would happen in the event of my mother's passing and my cousin doesn't want to give me the title?!?!?!

My mother isn't getting it. "On no! Rose ah good somebady man, shi woan rab mi..."

[Peasie]

This right here is my problem.

My mother is in the UK but there is the house and land in Jamaica. My mother has left the title in Jamaica with her niece (!) because she is acting landlord on behalf of my mother. So, um... What would happen in the event of my mother's passing and my cousin doesn't want to give me the title?!?!?!

My mother isn't getting it. "On no! Rose ah good somebady man, shi woan rab mi..."

On the surface, this situation does not sound like it is going to end well. Sorry to say.

I don't understand "left the title"? Does this mean she has legally transferred to title to her niece? Has her niece been formally added to the title? If so, she had to go through 'Title Office' and the ubiquitous 'Stamp Office' in Jamaica?

My dear, all kind of legal things happen when niece is "acting landlord." And it will be a hataclapse if your mother's children want to claim the property upon her death \0/ So mi would advise you to walk...no, RUN!... to the nearest lawyer in Jamaica who has experience in conveyancing (if interested, I can pm you the lawyer I used).

Until then, here what I would do ... membah seh mi is not a lawyer and dis is not legal advice, dis is juss my opinion:

1. Sit down with mom and have a serious conversation with her to clarify things. For me, this was the most difficult phase of this process
2. Does your mother want you and your siblings to inherit her estate? Tough question, but just because you are her children does not mean she wishes or has to leave property to unnos .

Let's just say your mother says that you are to inherit the property but also wants something left for her niece:

1. Find out if your mother has a will. What does the will state? Who is to inherit property?
2. Can you get a copy of the title and deed to the property?
3. Who is on this title?

My personal opinion is this: Encourage her to change her will so that it states something like this, "Upon my death, I direct all properties to be sold and the proceeds divided as such: 70% to my daughter UKBL and 30% to my niece Har Cousin" etc.

[Peasie]

1. They (mother) worship at TV church so no pastor to call
2. Dem talk to the neighbors so that is why I need the numbers, I get mi antisocial behavior from them
3. Their health now is fine, father still drives and my mother yard work put me to shame, I ask her to come rake mi leaves and I was not joking
4. Dem still talk whole heap a sense and we talk every day
5. Mi no know, I know my father drive go pay things

right now there really isn't any concerns but they in their 70s so they not staying "young" forever.

tell mi the stories

Yuh parents young, man! Perfect time to have The Conversation with them.

Soon come back wid more of my opinion and thoughts

[UKBlackLady]

On the surface, this situation does not sound like it is going to end well. Sorry to say.

I don't understand "left the title"? Does this mean she has legally transferred to title to her niece? Has her niece been formally added to the title? If so, she had to go through 'Title Office' and the ubiquitous 'Stamp Office' in Jamaica?

My dear, all kind of legal things happen when niece is "acting landlord." And it will be a hataclapse if your mother's children want to claim the property upon her death \0/ So mi would advise you to walk...no, RUN!... to the nearest lawyer in Jamaica who has experience in conveyancing (if interested, I can pm you the lawyer I used).

Until then, here what I would do ... membah seh mi is not a lawyer and dis is not legal advice, dis is juss my opinion:

1. Sit down with mom and have a serious conversation with her to clarify things. For me, this was the most difficult phase of this process
2. Does your mother want you and your siblings to inherit her estate? Tough question, but just because you are her children does not mean she wishes or has to leave property to unnos .

Let's just say your mother says that you are to inherit the property but also wants something left for her niece:

1. Find out if your mother has a will. What does the will state? Who is to inherit property?
2. Can you get a copy of the title and deed to the property?
3. Who is on this title?

My personal opinion is this: Encourage her to change her will so that it states something like this, "Upon my death, I direct all properties to be sold and the proceeds divided as such: 70% to my daughter UKBL and 30% to my niece Har Cousin" etc.

I agree, I don't think this will end well either in it's current set up...

As far as I am aware Peasie, my mother has just left the "Title" paperwork with her niece, but i could be wrong. Actually I have never seen the papers for this land.

I will be back in the UK in a couple of weeks for a month, so will have time to try and prise details out of her. At 91 she is as miserable and onery as they come and she'll probably accuse me of wanting to kill har arf fi tek har tings dem... Sigh... I must remember to ask only after she's eaten her favourite meal. KFC! Lol!

Thank you; pm re lawyer would be much appreciated.

[MsExced]

Lol at KFC whatever will do the trick ukblacklady