Violent three year old

[Stormmey]

So, a friend of mine got married bout two and half years ago, anyway the guy has a daughter and the Mother drop off the kid the other day, saying she cannot look after her and some other stuff. So the kid is living with them...

Anyway the kid, my friend says take a knife and cut herself from time to time, nothing serious she says but enough to draw blood. Very quiet pretty little girl...too quiet I think but am not an expert on kids. She told me bout two days ago she was changing her baby and stepped into the ensuite leaving the baby in the crib and came back in to see the little girl in the crib with a pillow over the baby head.

She says she so frighten that she grabbed the kid and flung her on the bed,grabbed up the baby who started screaming. I asked her if they not going to get some help for the little girl....she says nothing wrong with her she is just plain evil.

Now!! how can a three year old do something like that you think nothing wrong with her. Lawd!! some ooman should not have kids. How can you not think something is wrong with a three year old that does this, where did she get the cutting herself with knife from and putting a pillow on the baby's face.

I know it sound mean but me just distance myself, I have enough dealing with in my life right now. That little girl need some serious help.

[Hush Darlin]

Re: Violent three year old

that child need help and needs it fast.
and your friend better be careful too as they might think she is abusing the child
they should get help for her like yesterday

[Gen]

Re: Violent three year old

1. the 3 year old did not just happen to do those things out of the blue. the same things she is doing were either done to her, or she has seen someone else doing them. she needs to be evaluated by a therapist qualified to work with small children.

2. sounds like your friend has a baby. i know she is your friend but if that is HER solution to the 3 year old's behavioural problems, your friend too needs help, or at the very least some knowledge on how to deal with these kinds of situation. she is a mother so she needs go and arm herself with knowledge.


i cannot believe she said that the child is just "plain evil". suppose that was her 3 year old ? would she have said the same thing ? or is it because it's NOT her child why she sounds like she couldn't care less ?

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SweetSsop</div><div class="ubbcode-body">that child need help and needs it fast.
and your friend better be careful too as they might think she is abusing the child
they should get help for her like yesterday </div></div>

I told her the same thing minus the abusing part, but hey!! I gave my input and step back. Yes the little girl needs help but girlfriend giving me attitude. If I thought that they were abusing the little girl I would report it....then again if they do nothing it is abuse.

[julie*mango]

Re: Violent three year old

definately some emotional problem going on there...domestic violence? child abuse? child needs to see a professional...btw she not developmentally disabled is she?

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

Gen I think the little girl's Mom is El Whaco I have seen her around town. My friend is just so focused on her baby that I think that little girl not getting any attention. I know they are not abusing her but physically but emotionally.

In short I don't think she cares since the kid tried to hurt her baby...but she is a baby also. Lawd me head a hurt me, I cannot take on anymore right now

Her husband has a very demanding job and work long hours so only home really on weekend. I do not think he get involved enough.

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Ayanna_Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">definately some emotional problem going on there...domestic violence? child abuse? child needs to see a professional...btw she not developmentally disabled is she? </div></div>

No Skelly she not, I observe her and think she is a smart kid. Too quiet tho for a three year old. I think something happened fore her Mom dropped her off and I mean literally dropped her off like drive up to their house ring doorbell plop her clothes and driveaway.

[Gen]

Re: Violent three year old

ok you voiced your opinions/concerns to your &quot;friend&quot; and she did not care. try voicing them to the father, and hopefully he can use his senses to get the child some help.



<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Stormmey1</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Gen I think the little girl's Mom is El Whaco I have seen her around town. My friend is just so focused on her baby that I think that little girl not getting any attention. I know they are not abusing her but physically but emotionally.

In short I don't think she cares since the kid tried to hurt her baby...but she is a baby also. Lawd me head a hurt me, I cannot take on anymore right now

Her husband has a very demanding job and work long hours so only home really on weekend. I do not think he get involved enough. </div></div>

[julie*mango]

Re: Violent three year old

worst case scenario call child services to come and have the child examined by a specialist...

[SistahD]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Stormmey1</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Ayanna_Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">definately some emotional problem going on there...domestic violence? child abuse? child needs to see a professional...btw she not developmentally disabled is she? </div></div>

No Skelly she not, I observe her and think she is a smart kid. Too quiet tho for a three year old. I think something happened fore her Mom dropped her off and I mean literally dropped her off like drive up to their house ring doorbell plop her clothes and driveaway. </div></div>


Similiar situation as with my great neice I mentionned last year - in your friend's case, the 3 year old has likely been exposed to some real unhealthy and neglectful maternal behaviour - which can really mess us a little ones mind. Then being abandoned into another home, draws out more issues in the child's behaviour. That, added to competing for attention from a very busy father type, and a 'replacement' mom with baby... those three causes together or seperately can be direct or contributing to behavioural issues.

She needs love, attention, reassurance, patience and a good amount of discipline as well -all on a consistent basis from the adults in her new home to help turn her thought process around... and input / assistance from professionals as well to ensure her behaviour can be adjusted to help her become a 'nice, normal little girl'.

If your friend and the father cannot commit.... someone else needs to because this little girl desperately needs help.

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Ayanna_Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">worst case scenario call child services to come and have the child examined by a specialist... </div></div>

Lawd really did not want to do that but I ran something by my step granmere, she teaches Psychology (speciality cognitive science) at the University out here. I am going to visit one day and take her with me and let her observe. I know if she feels something is wrong she will get involve.

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">ok you voiced your opinions/concerns to your &quot;friend&quot; and she did not care. try voicing them to the father, and hopefully he can use his senses to get the child some help. </div></div>

Lawd Gen, that is one 30 year old man that think like him 80 years old or something where child rearing is concerned. Statements like you cannot do much with a gild because girls are so delicate, statements like he will get involved when his son is older, cause now he is a baby he is scared to hold him he might drop him.

But, will run it by him and then face her wrath and anger with statements like why are you all up in our lives. That's why at this point I have stepped back cause I have a short fuse.

[Stormmey]

Re: Violent three year old

SisD, I hear you. I always wonder why some women have kids....is it because they really want to or just to fulfil society desires that females should have children.

I hope your grandniece is much better now.

[f0rTyLeGz]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Stormmey1</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Ayanna_Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">worst case scenario call child services to come and have the child examined by a specialist... </div></div>

Lawd really did not want to do that but I ran something by my step granmere, she teaches Psychology (speciality cognitive science) at the University out here. I am going to visit one day and take her with me and let her observe. I know if she feels something is wrong she will get involve. </div></div>
That sounds like a good plan.

But I agree with SistahD ... for this child to have a normal life, she is going to need parents in her life that give her love and loving attention 24/7. No child is going to grow strong, healthy and happy, whose mother believes the child is &quot;evil.&quot;

Some... perhaps many young women have babies because they believe (in their naivete and ignorance) that their baby <span style="font-style: italic">will love them.</span> They don't have any notion about the stress and work and anxiety that a new born will cause in their life. Many young mothers lose it, they are violent and abusive with their newborn. Then they are overcome with guilt... and then blame the child for their awful relationship.

[SistahD]

Re: Violent three year old

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Stormmey1</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I hope your grandniece is much better now. </div></div>



She is not... because there is an issue of having an older half-brother (with serious developmental &amp; behaviourial problems, anger issues, violent tendancies and worse)... she is not allowed to be separated from him (lesser of two evils in the opinion of Children's Aid). Thus, her behaviour will not improve, only worsen and evolve into something uglier.

Oh yeah, almost forgot... after a year in foster care, CAS returned the children to the birth mother with no notice, thereby returning them into the same environment and lack of care as they were removed from.



The child is doomed.