Stay at home parents

[twiney]

I know the concept is a wonderful idea but are more parents hurting their children socially than helping by keeping them at home? This ques comes as I was talking with 2 of my friends and they think their children are at a disadvantage when it comes to social situations such as school/crowds ... and separation anxiety this I cant identify with as Adale was in daycare since he was 5 months old.

While I would love to have more time taking child(ren) doing it full time isnt something I could personally do without somehow ending up in mad house. Does it require a certain personality? I encouraged them to get them into a play group or pre-school environment where they get to interact with different people both in their age group as well as caregivers. How does one get it to work?

[kia027]

Re: Stay at home parents

a parent never says I wish I spent less time with my kids

The time you are home with your baby you are bonding and helping them explore the world. They can develop their social skills with mommy & me, playgroups and such. Plus when they reach grade school they will be fine.


A lot of women say they will end up in the madhouse but that is because the woman has not connected with similarly situated mothers for THEIR social interaction

[twiney]

Re: Stay at home parents

Keyer I have no desire to stay home ... not going happen but mi fren them doin it already and mi think them doing a good job overall that's why mi suggest the play group to them but mi think one of them getting overwhelmed and possibly depressed

[Nylah]

Re: Stay at home parents


some women think they want to stay home FT and then find out that they arent cut out for it. No big deal. You just adjust to what suits you and your kid best.

all the stay at home mom's I know set up play dates and other outings to keep themselves balanced. Why cant this woman simply do the same?

[twiney]

Re: Stay at home parents

Nylah I think it is more than just the play dates they need though as if they know the pople they seem to get along just fine. I think is more a need for them to be in social settings of say a pre-school/play school/day care for a least a few hours 2-3 times a week between 2.5 years and when they get to kindergarten.

Have a co-worker whose child (them believe and mecking people convince them that the pickney have delayed speech development etc) when I think the only problem is he hasnt interacted with enough children his age and they dont talk to him enough.

[Nylah]

Re: Stay at home parents


I used playdate as an example of a social setting. The main point is for them to get out an interact - whatever shape that takes.

[kia027]

Re: Stay at home parents

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Nylah I think it is more than just the play dates they need though as if they know the pople they seem to get along just fine. I think is more a need for them to be in social settings of say a pre-school/play school/day care for a least a few hours 2-3 times a week between 2.5 years and when they get to kindergarten.</div></div>

but that is the standard no? 2 1/2 yrs you go to a social setting a few times a week for a few hrs

[twiney]

Re: Stay at home parents

Kia I dont know if it is standard but that is what I think is reasonable.

[Nylah]

Re: Stay at home parents


sorry but this whole convo is making me scratch my head

[Gen]

Re: Stay at home parents

BOAL

[kia027]

Re: Stay at home parents

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nylah</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
sorry but this whole convo is making me scratch my head </div></div>

or pat your weave which is it?

[Bizzy]

Re: Stay at home parents

Being a stay @ home parent doesn't mean the kid has to stay @ home the entire time as well.

Apart from play dates, you can put the child in daycare/nursery or whatever P/T where they go 1/2 day everyday or only 2 or 3 times out of the week.

I think the 24/7 thing can start to become a chore and the mom/dad will need a break to do chores and errands that the kid might usually slow them down or keep them from doing.

If the SAHP knwo wah dem a do it can be a win win situationf or everybody and not hurt the child's social skills.
Only a eediat would lock up dem self inna de yaad 24/7 wid a infant, toddler, pre-schooler

[Wahalla]

Re: Stay at home parents

I beleive one parent should stay home if they can afford to...
note the word parent.. not mother...

[ILP]

Re: Stay at home parents

well i think that each one needs to do what works for them.
i know my limitations already and i am going back to work IMMEDIATELY (well as immediate as the school calendar permits...)
in the meantime i have made it a point to engage myself with other activities (that have nothing to do with my crumbsnatcher) to stimulate my brain to keep myself happy.
a happy SAHP makes for a happy family all the way around.

staying at home is not an option for us (and it has nothing to do with money)...it just wouldn't work for us on an emotional level.

[Wahalla]

Re: Stay at home parents

Here is my question to you then are you happy in third partying your child development to a non family member ? I dont...

a stay at home parent is the hardest job ever... Going to work is easier...she who must be obeyed has been able to stay at home and parent. I trust my parnters judgemnt, I trust her abiulity to impart a sense of self to my children.

There are after school care in teh village school weher we bide and my chldren ask to go there ... I distrust publci institutions.

The thing that striuck me is that there are children in these groups for whom this is a matter of routine...And these are so populat that in the next village over it is oversubscribed to the extent that there is a years witing list.

I spend a considerable amount of time away from home and watch parents particularly mothers whom struggle with buggies on London busses to take their toddlers to child care.


We all parent as how we see fit. My idea way is diametrically opposite to yours. I am happy that this child care is avaibhlable, but I am happy that we can afford to have a stay at home parent....