The terminally ill co-worker

[diabolical_Tanya]

How do you deal with it? We are not close but ......

Lawd mi noh know weh fi do, (and by do I actually mean say)

One of my VP's has been diagnosed with terminal prostate cancer.

He found out last week. He is only in my building 2-3 days a week as he also has his own thing in another city.

He was started on chemo right away to give him "time"

He plans on working as long as he can........which means I will have meetings with him as usual.

No official announcement has been made, I just know because...well because mi fass bad. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] I wish I had remained in my blissful ignorance.

He knows that I know "some" of the story.


What do you say in these situations? keep it normal or wha?

if unno pray please pray for him, his oldest kid just turned 16 last week [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

[Ochigal]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

Yes, keep it as normal as possible. I had a coworker (our offices were next to each other) who had terminal lung cancer. She worked as long as possible...but eventually had to stay home.

There were times during her chemo she would rush out of her office and into the bathroom (across the hall from my office) and I could hear her in there vomiting. All I could do was ask if there was anything she needed. Occassionally she would say yes, some water...or something like that. Most the time we would just chat about work stuff or my son...she didnt have kids and was really into all of ours and our stories about them.

Its tough but she did tell me once that she appreciated everyone treating her like they always had...she didnt want pity.

[diabolical_Tanya]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

Thanks MrsOG

[halfwaytree]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

Wow, that's a tough one!

I agree with Mrs. Ochigal.

Treat them as you would if they were healthy and just be there to listen if they feel like talking.

[QK13]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

Tanya, sorry to hear about your VP.
When my sis had breast cancer the first time, her manager walked on egg shells and would whisper the word <span style="color: #999999"><span style='font-size: 8pt'>cancer</span></span>


Drove my sis crazy. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

Thankfully she was NOT terminal and is in remission.
[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70384-praying.gif[/img]

Normal is best.

[CeaBee]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

my aunt didnt tell anyone what she was going thru...it wasn't until she was almost on her deathbed that she let the family (in jamaica and US- she was in Canada) know [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

if casual friends/acquaintances asked about her...her husband would just say that she was fine..and very busy why they hadn't seen her in a while.

sigh

[ILP]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

i've had two co-workers die of cancer (one of the brain and the other was prostate). what both were adament (sp) about was being treated normally..they didnt want the pity. i remember that Bonnie (the one with brain cancer) didnt even tell anyone until 2 days before school ended (for teachers) that she was dying of cancer. She packed up her classroom, told everyone good bye have a nice summer...she was dead a week later.

(((((Taner)))

[CeaBee]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

sorry...i meant to come back and connect my story to your original post tanya...

my aunt didn't tell many people until absolutely necessary because she didn't want the pity and "the looks" that she knew that she would get....

so "normal" (as possible) treatment is good advice

[diabolical_Tanya]

Re: The terminally ill co-worker

Thanks ILP, Milo and Coolbeans [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img]