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Dear Pastor,
I am a 22-year-old girl living in the United States for the past five years. When I went to high school in Jamaica, there was this guy who liked me, but at the time I wasn't interested in guys, so I never talked to him; plus he was a player.
After leaving Jamaica, I signed up to a particular website on the internet and the same guy who liked me in high school was on it too. He started to email me and tell me things like, how he used to like me in high school but I never talked to him. By him constantly emailing me and my doing the same, I decided to give him my number and he started calling me all the time and also telling me how he wants to be with me.
fell in love
I went to Jamaica in December, 2008 to see him. We hooked up and I fell in love with him. I had planned to spend two months, but ended up spending six months, because of him. While I was in Jamaica, he told me he would be coming to live in America soon. I asked him how he planned to live there if his family is filing for him; he told me that his family was not really filing for him, so he would tell me the truth. He worked at a famous hotel in Negril where he met a lady who really loved him and wanted to get married to him and take him to America. He said that he thought about it and accepted her offer because it would be a great opportunity for him. She is 33 years old and he is 23. He said that he didn't want her; he is just doing so to get his green card. I believed him because I have a lot of family members who have done that.
During my time in Jamaica, they got married in March, 2008. He told me not to call him; he will call me because he doesn't want her to know he is with someone else. I did exactly what he said. He called everytime he got a chance to tell me don't worry, he is only doing it to get a better life and he loves me and can't wait to be with me.
She spent two weeks with him in Jamaica. The day she left, he called me to come to his house, and we had sex as soon as I got there. He said he couldn't wait for her to leave. He told me that he loves me so much and soon he will be in America with me. During my time in Jamaica, he treated me well. He took me out and bought me gifts. Everything was so good with him. I finally left Jamaica in June, 2008. He came to America in September, 2008.
lie all the time
When he came he called me and told me that he will call me as before, I should not call him. He did not want his wife to know about me. Once again, I did what he told me. We live in different states, but not far away. All his friends know about me and most of them live in the same state as me, so when-ever he would come to see me, he would lie all the time to his wife and tell her that he is going to see his friends but really he was coming to see me. Or, I would go to his state and I would stay in hotels. While there, he would come see me in the day while she is at work. This is how we have been living for the past 10 months.
Pastor, I really love him and I think he really loves me. He calls me late at nights to have phone sex with him while his wife is sleeping. <span style="font-weight: bold">That's how much he said he wants me and doesn't like his wife</span>.
I really love him but I don't know if I can continue living my life like this. And I know it is wrong. Please, pray for me. I need you to give me your fatherly advice. T.M., New York, United States
Dear T.M.,
This young man is not a person of integrity. He is a liar. He is dishonest and he is a master of deception. This is not a man to be proud of. He may be using you or he may be using the woman he married.
When both of you started talking on the net, he did not tell you about the woman he planned to marry. He did so after you came to Jamaica and spent months with him. It is either he is fooling you, or fooling his wife. You may think that you are special so he cannot be fooling you. But you are wrong. His wife has much more to offer him than you. The only thing you have to offer that man right now is your body, yes, I mean sex, yes, just sex! I strongly believe that you are making yourself a fool and you are laughing at his wife, but you are doing so at your own peril.
Let us however assume that he is not fooling you and it is his wife that he is deceiving. Why would you as a woman, want a man who is such a liar and a scoundrel? How would you ever trust him in the future if you were to become his wife? Poor you.
I urge you to end the relationship with this man immediately. Sometimes when people are in love they cannot see the truth, but may God open your eyes to see that this is a man that you should not trust.
Pastor
she'd probably put the french fries in the fryer upside down. 
How would she be able to tell whether or not the <span style="font-weight: bold">french fries</span> were upside down in the fryer? 
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