when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

[FrenchTickla]

mi have a fren weh hate har bredda. yes, her words. she hate him wid di passion of 1000 suns.

him (late 30s) nuh stop breed him wife and him wife nuh stop breed fi him . dem push out 8 arreddy (all singletons, di last one a few months ago) and she is currently with child .

mi fren (mid 30s) been overcompensating for growing up on a farm with "backward" parents who never really parented. she live in a condo in di city, have har advanced degrees, too many friends to count, totally rejected di family's religion, well read, very hip, far left politically, no children.

but har bredda and sista a leggo bease. sista sleep around, bredda breed around.

now she find harself bitterly paying for children who are not hers (caw she cyaan watch dem suffa) while har modda blame di son's wife and dem continue to breed and have no plans as to how dem a go tek care of di pickney dem.

every month she a go some kinda family event. is always smaddy birthday, anniversary ... she feels har only option is fi leff town and figet bout har fambily.

as a fren wah u wuda tell har?

[Suesumba]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

she shouldn't take up their responsibility.

<span style="font-style: italic">Edited to add:</span>

who says just because you're related to a person you owe that person any obligations? what if you had a *sibling* who everytime dem si yu dem spit eena yu face, you'da feel seh yu haffi goh an dem birthday/anniversary whatever? extreme, but you get the picture.

we're told that we should have some sort of loyalty to them, but if an outside person behaved this way, you wouldn't tolerate it. judge them as you would any other person. you have to distant your mind from it and view the situation in an unemotional way.

when i say &quot;you&quot;, i mean &quot;you&quot; in the general sense, not &quot;you&quot;.

[missus_vegas]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

maybe they keep having accidents. [censored] happens u know.

[julie*mango]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SueSumba</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

who says just because you're related to a person you owe that person any obligations?


we're told that we should have some sort of loyalty to them, but if an outside person behaved this way, you wouldn't tolerate it. judge them as you would any other person. </div></div>

amen Sue. Dem seh mi cold because I will cut anybody from mi life if dem a have a negative impact on mi...but mi nah tek dat ish from nobody pan di road so mi nuh si y mi fi subject miself to it.


Mi was watching Angella's Ashes the other day. Seen it before and read the book as well butcertain scenes bore more weight to me at that time than they did before.

The scene that struck a chord with me is when Frankie's aunt had taken him to buy him a new suit for the first day of work. He even made a remark that she had alot of money to spare because she had no children of her own. His mother had 5 of them I think and the father had abandoned them. I was wondering to myself, how is it that she could see her sister and her children suffering all this time and not help them until much later on. Then a few scenes later we learn that the aunt had to borrow money to buy Frank's new suit. I understood immediately that although she had no children she still could not save her sister and her brood.


This scene comes to mind because your friend is the aunt and I suppose they figure since she has no kids that she has more money to spare and their kids would be ok. She needs to let them know that is not so. Tell her to harden her heart some. But weaken it when necessary.

[Suesumba]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: _______</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
This scene comes to mind because your friend is the aunt and I suppose they figure since she has no kids that she has more money to spare and their kids would be ok. She needs to let them know that is not so. Tell her to harden her heart some. But weaken it when necessary. </div></div>

that's presumptuous. in this case, i'd count the aunt as a great friend. that's something a friend would do. it's not about blood relationships, sometimes it's about friendship. mi wenna goh use wan millian dalla wud like fililiality, but mi cudden spell ie.

[FrenchTickla]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

mi agree dat she need fi cut di strings but yikes it hawd.

di parents enabling him tho. wah mek dem keep supporting him almshouse behavior?

i swear they must be mentally challenged to be popping dem out like dis and two during di miggle of di economic downturn?

i personally tink him need to be castrated.

wat is sadder is dat di older kids stawting to hate dem parents guts now

[LiteBlonde]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">as a fren wah u wuda tell har?</div></div>

I would tell her to move. If she stays around, she will get used.

Sometimes family treat you worse than strangers just because they feel entitled. She need to do the math and dip with the quickness.

[kia027]

Re: when u bredda won't stop sew him seed

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">now she find harself bitterly paying for children who are not hers (caw she cyaan watch dem suffa) while har modda blame di son's wife and dem continue to breed and have no plans as to how dem a go tek care of di pickney dem.</div></div>

if she bitter she need to cut herself loose from the family.. she needs a break to 'do her'