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When its hot in the jungle of peace I go swimming in the ocean of love..... -
Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
interesting. -
Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
From the article:
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Juliet Jeske, NY-based comedian</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Since I left my husband I have been unable to do a number of things -- the most frustrating lost skill is the ability to date. After nine years in a committed relationship, I have extreme difficulty navigating the nuanced dance that is dating. I have learned I can't be too direct, eager, needy, desperate, clingy, emotional, commitment pressuring, or baby daddy seeking. I also have to avoid looking cold, aloof, *****y, mean, shallow, negative or distant. And of course I can't even talk about my ex, even if the past nine years of my life was living and working with him! Then there are the crazy games of when to text, email or call, when to answer immediately, when to act interested or disinterested and when to completely blow them off. As a person who is by nature very direct and to the point, dating is a mystery trapped in a puzzle, tucked in a fireproof safe thrown down a mineshaft. I just can't figure it out. But the most distressing behavior is the casual sex hook-up mating habits that dominate New York City, a city that I adore and call my home.
I am a committed relationship type of gal. I make no illusions to being anything but this, and I do not judge others with different lifestyles. If a polyamorous life of multiple lovers or a string of emotionally detached one-night stands with perfect strangers is satisfying to a person, then they should be doing exactly that. But I know there are others like me that aren't wired this way, and seek something with some level of greater commitment both emotionally and sexually. I have a myriad of friends who complain all the time:
"I am not slutty enough for New York."</div></div>
Only New York?
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
OK, I have to say since I have been in my teens and old enough to date, this is always the way I have known things to be. I am having trouble believing that she got married after the turn of the century and this is front page news to her.
I guess the only difference now is that people are a lot more vocal about their activities than they have been since the free love 60s.
I admit finding someone compatible can be like trying to find a needle in a stack of needles, but it's not any different than it has been in the last 50 years.Comment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
thoughts become actions, you attract what u put out into the universe
If you don't fight for what you deserve, you deserve what you get.
We are > Fossil Fuels --- Bill McKibben 350.orgComment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"I do not judge others with different lifestyles."</div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">"But what are we supposed to do when everyone around us seems to be <span style="font-weight: bold">whoring it up</span>?</div></div>
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
What happened to just having some patience ? I don't get the need for all the name calling by the author just because she hasn't hasn't found a man yet........jeezComment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: R_C</div><div class="ubbcode-body">What happened to just having some patience ? I don't get the need for all the name calling by the author just because she hasn't hasn't found a man yet........jeez </div></div>
She's bitter. I can see from the tone of her article that she probably did not want to get divorced.
Also, she's aging and realizes she does have the same exterior bait she had a decade ago when she got married. She should have been able to develop some interior wisdom and other qualities in all that time though. She may not realize her desperation makes her less desirable. I felt like running, and I'm not even a man.
Her best bet would be to become more active in hobbies that interest her and not just to meet a man, even that would be a nice little ancillary benefit, but to give her something to do other than conduct a "woe is me" manhunt. Also, I think she is a good candidate for for an online dating site so she can feel like she's targeting her search.Comment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Tulip</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
She's bitter. I can see from the tone of her article that she probably did not want to get divorced.
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apparently her ex was a closeted homosexual who is now openly living a gay lifestyle.Comment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: MGee</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
apparently her ex was a closeted homosexual who is now openly living a gay lifestyle. </div></div>
I'm all for him and his openly gay lifestyle. I wish they would all come out. I do not like the DL thing. Be you so I can know who you are. Everybody would be a whole lot happier.
She should really be wanting to take her time and spin her wheels a bit this time after that farce instead of immediately going back on lockdown with a man she does not really know. Now, I think her morality tirade may be a passive-aggressive way of lashing out at the ex.Comment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
yu know wat mi notice too...it hard fi find someone slutty to be a slut wid
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
Tulip it seems to me dat she is one a dem weh gi weh di P_m P_m and tink say bcus him get it him gonna stay. seem like she did dis a few times and now dat har list is more dan wat she can count on one hand
she starting to feel guilty. instead of dealing wid her own guilt she blaming it on "society". oh i only gave it up bcus i thought that thats wat u do these days....she need a race lick. she one step away from owning a dog....ok dont take dat too seriously now dog ppl. i dont mean neting insulting and mi nah chow no words/ stone/ blows etc etc 
also not implying bestiality... a mr vegas mi get dat from. we pass one ooman inna traffic di other day and him look over pan di ooman and say bway she look like she one step away from owning a dog....i think he was just joking about the stereotypical single women who goes to the pound and rescue a dog...or puss...
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Click to reveal.. <input type="button" class="form-button" value="Show me!" onclick="toggle_spoiler(this, 'Yikes, my eyes!', 'Show me!')" /></div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div style="display: none;">lawd god i hope dahjah have him shovel fi come help dig mi outta dis yah hole yah. my survival instinct telling me fi just delete di dog comments cus too much dog lovers on here but its in my nature to shoot now an ask questions later
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">yu know wat mi notice too...it hard fi find someone slutty to be a slut wid </div></div>
lol wen i read this i was like...she must be black
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Vegas</div><div class="ubbcode-body">a mr vegas mi get dat from. we pass one ooman inna traffic di other day and him look over pan di ooman and say bway she look like she one step away from owning a dog.... </div></div>
@ Mr. Vegas comment
Actually owning a dog might attract men
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Wonder where all the good – and single – guys have gone? Try the dog park. That's right – believe it or not, there's a certain logic to it all, to wit:
* A single guy with a dog shows that he can commit to something. He just hasn't found the right person to shower his attention on.
* He obviously is putting forth effort into the relationship, i.e., he's spending time with the dog (and cleaning up after it, if he's responsible, an added bonus – willingness to clean).
* He's probably hoping his dog will help him meet an eligible woman he can get to know.
Of course, you'd look pretty silly showing up at a dog park without a dog – that would make your intentions just a little too obvious. But if you have a dog, or want to get a dog to share your life with, then by all means do so. But choose a dog that fits your lifestyle and a breed you can love and enjoy, even if you are going to do that alone.
If the breed you choose had the added benefit of attracting the type of guy you want, why not use all the ammunition you have to snare your soul mate? </div></div>Comment
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Re: dating after divorce in a city of sluts
@ Skelly
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Hi All
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