Income and relationship

[franksterr]

Gents
How does the fact that your woman earns <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than you or is more successful than you affects your relationship?

Ladies
How does the fact that your man earns <span style="font-weight: bold">less</span> than you or is less of a success than you affects your relationship?

Ladies and Gents
If you have always earned <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than your mate does that give you more weight in the decision making process in your relationship?

[twiney]

Re: Income and relationship

What if his success is not determined by his income?

[quodlibet]

Re: Income and relationship

embedded in this is the implication that the woman earning less than the man would NOT affect the relationship... makes me wonder.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: franksterr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Gents
How does the fact that your woman earns <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than you or is more successful than you affects your relationship?

Ladies
How does the fact that your man earns <span style="font-weight: bold">less</span> than you or is less of a success than you affects your relationship?

Ladies and Gents
If you have always earned <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than your mate does that give you more weight in the decision making process in your relationship?

</div></div>

[CyberPhobic]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: franksterr</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Gents
How does the fact that your woman earns <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than you or is more successful than you affects your relationship?

Ladies
How does the fact that your man earns <span style="font-weight: bold">less</span> than you or is less of a success than you affects your relationship?

Ladies and Gents
If you have always earned <span style="font-weight: bold">more </span>than your mate does that give you more weight in the decision making process in your relationship?

</div></div>

Mi nuh deal wid man whe mekk less $$ dan mi. Mi cyaah have nuh <span style="font-weight: bold">Relation</span> widd dat dey typea <span style="font-weight: bold">Ship</span>.

<span style="color: #FF0000"><span style="font-style: italic">It takes money to pay for your doctor bill
and your psychiatrist if you're actin ill
It takes money for a king to have a queen
It takes money for the king to buy her ring
It takes money for a castle when the king is crowned
cos money what make the world go round
It takes money money (money money)
Cash, money money (money moneyyy), that's right
It takes money money a-to the bill
A-to the B-I-double L, BILL for real

Coolio</span></span>

[kia027]

Re: Income and relationship

I was just going to say the same as Twiney &amp; Quodlibet

A balance on a relationship is not solely determined by money but by what each partner brings to the table.

The state of the economy being what it is, there are clearly cases where the man is now the stay at home parent. Roles have switched and for the families where the man has taken on the domestic duties those relationships seem to be working well. The fathers have also developed a new appreciation for what it takes to run a household as well

[Wahalla]

Re: Income and relationship

I wish mine did. id stay home and look after the children rather than her.

[Skelly]

Re: Income and relationship

I would have no problems dating a man who earned less than me if he supported me in many other ways...I know of one husband who stays home with the kids, his wife is a nurse, him do everyting roun di house, and if it snows, him go di wife job and dig her car out, warm it up fi her, an clean it off right before she suppose to come out den him leff an go home....dat to me is worth more than a man who mek moola an doan do squat...

[Cultcha]

Re: Income and relationship

I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does.

[Tulip]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kotch_Foot_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does. </div></div>

At least you know yourself well enough to admit it. When I have been in relationships with men who made Iess money than I, they act like it's no problem but eventually resent me in the end.

I want the man to make more money, but that cannot be the main glue that holds us together. Money comes and goes so who is up today may be down tomorrow.

Franksterr, i would not stay long in a relationship where it turns out the balance of decision making power is determined by who has the highest bank balance.

[DearK]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kotch_Foot_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does. </div></div>

Does this mean you would end a relationship once you realized it? If not, how do you think it would play out?

[Wendy]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kotch_Foot_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does. </div></div>

Bravo Milo Thanks for that bit of honesty!

Tulip said it... so many men say they want an &quot;independent woman&quot; who got her &quot;own&quot; and that sounds pleasing to the ear until you are in a relationship then you see the real deal.

I was once in a relationship where I found myself trying to down play my accomplishments just so I could make the person feel comfortable....which in turn made ME uncomfortable. Let's face it.. it is not ever going to be equal when it comes to income...somebody is going to make more and 9/10 times that may have to do with the person's drive, type of work or education.

This is why I believe that relationships have to be more about common interest/goals and less about financial status and material possessions. There are these magic words in the English language that make a whole lot of difference to avoid those insecurities. Words like, &quot;We&quot;, &quot;our&quot; and &quot;Us&quot;

[SandiF]

Re: Income and relationship

Why were you downplaying your accomplishments to make him comfortable? Was he complaining?

What do you mean by &quot;accomplishments&quot;? Are you referring to educational background? You are in a position as VP while he is a garbage collector? Or is this accomplishment based on material possessions? Or is it accomplishments based on you being the sole income earner even with an associate degree and he has a PhD but still not able to get a job or get that unknown invention patented?

Just trying to understand what you mean by accomplishments and why were you trying to downplay it. If you had common interest and goals, why were your accomplishments an issue?

[Skelly]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kotch_Foot_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does. </div></div>

I suppose you like to feel...needed.

[Cultcha]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Kotch_Foot_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I'm old fashioned. I would like to say that it would not bother me but it does. </div></div>

I suppose you like to feel...needed. </div></div>

I dunno! I guess it was how you were raised. My childhood was pretty average. Mom looked after the house and the kids and also worked part time while dad worked his job and was the main provider, financially.

I guess it is just what I find familiar and normal.

[Wahalla]

Re: Income and relationship

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Skelly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I would have no problems dating a man who earned less than me if he supported me in many other ways...I know of one husband who stays home with the kids, his wife is a nurse, him do everyting roun di house, and if it snows, him go di wife job and dig her car out, warm it up fi her, an clean it off right before she suppose to come out den him leff an go home....dat to me is worth more than a man who mek moola an doan do squat... </div></div>

Sorry but dat is just not right.. dig ar own cyar out!