Help!

[julie*mango]

Re: Help!

It's a personal decision I have chosen to live with for many reasons Nunya...

I really don't want anything to do with him.

That's all I have to say about that.

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

Skells, the more I write here the wierder this stuff sounds, as I read what I'm writing. The caregiver was originally hired for my mother...then my dad got really sick in the last 2 months and....uh....things, I thought, were getting handled...at least that is what I was being told. I never heard about the aquired brain thing...these folks kept their dysfunctions well masked for years...if they have a breath left I doubt they would allow anything like that...ya know, like a horror flick, where just when ya think the monster is dead it raises up and....tries to make you look like an idiot!

[Seveen]

Re: Help!

turtledude [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] have you looked into hospice?

and i would stop by more often - the "caregiver" may not be able to handle this stage . . .

my brother had MS and his legs totally atrophied into fetal position due to lack of care - speeded his death and limited his quality of life - but his wife had control

TD - your dad should be comfortable for his last days

it will give you peace of mind after the inevitable

and Skelly i didn't talk to my dad for 2 years before he was hospitalized and eventually died - but i made sure he had the best funeral ever - none of his so-called friends - that seemed to have priority over me - took up the task

i laid him out good and that was that - he hasn't even visited me in my dreams - and i have no guilt

you should have seen who came out of the woodwork - when it was time to read the will [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img]

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

Yea SevY...we got a hospice gal there about twice a week...that's how he's getting the morphine and oxycoten that he loves....no need for alcohol when ya got this stuff!...before he got real sick he was stealing mom's prescription stuff...I found that out after I took him to the hospital the last time....I always wondered why he was so particular about how and when she got her meds...(to the point of obsessing) He admitted stealing it only after we told him hospice would give him anything he wanted for himself...OH...and Nunya, they're not alcoholics anymore, they've graduated to better things. (smirk)

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

...still, no matter what, I don't want my last visual memory of my dad to be what I saw today.... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crybaby.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Help!

Well dude, vent as much as you want, cause I think that's all you'll be able to do, mate. They'll do whatever they want. Need breeds ingenuity. And if they need the stuff, they'll get ingenious...

So vent away [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img]

[Seveen]

Re: Help!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: turtledude</div><div class="ubbcode-body">...still, no matter what, I don't want my last visual memory of my dad to be what I saw today.... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crybaby.gif[/img] </div></div>

[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img]

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

yea Nunya, I know....personal powerlessness sucks....but ya know, if I were king of the world..... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/smirk.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Help!

...you'd make me your queen and we'd stomp on the little people... wait, different topic...

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img]......perfect!!! so, short of that, I should probably go rent a movie an keep my mind occupied with somethin else...any recommendations??? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70456-eyebrows.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Help!

[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/grin.gif[/img]

[Suesumba]

Re: Help!

i think they need to be out of the home in a more professional environment.

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SueSumba</div><div class="ubbcode-body">i think they need to be out of the home in a more professional environment. </div></div>
no chit!....cept that the prime directive to me and wuss brother unit was that they never were to be put in a care home...and one thing has led to another, and then another, until all the personalities involved are now interdependent on this sick play...still, after it all plays out...nobodies gunna be fighting over wills, money, or anything else...cuz it's being dealt with along the way...I'm grateful for that, cuz I've seen too many families destroyed over that stuff....My dad didn't talk to HIS mother for the last 5 yrs. of her life...even tho she lived a mile an a half away....it was all about money. So I ended up taking care of her too. I dream about living in a cave.

[MsExced]

Re: Help!

[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] hang in there turtledude and continue to do the very best for your parents.

[turtledude]

Re: Help!

Thanks Xced,...I guess its all about going to bed at the end of the day knowin I did the best I could, and if I mess up, admitting it, and vowing to do a little better next time...or at least hopeing I do... I gotta admit, I didn't deal with things very gracefully yesterday....but I've done a whole lot worse in the past. A lot of times my words have more impact on people than I realize....I probably should have walked out the door [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/whatever.gif[/img],kept my mouth shut [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70374-lipsrsealed.gif[/img], got on with other business [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/music.gif[/img], and came back another day when the place didn't smell.