What do you think partners can do to support each other in the tough economy? I may have previously mentioned the couple with the husband who's been out of work for over a year It is really taking a toll on their relationship. How long would you stay in a 'for worse' situation?
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">How long would you stay in a 'for worse' situation? </div></div>
When you're in a committed relationship, there is no limit to the <span style="font-weight: bold">time</span> you stay in a 'for worse' situation. What may be a few short months for one person may feel like a lifetime for another person. But, imho, there should be a limit on what you should tolerate as far as your personal happiness and well-being.
For your friend, she has to determine what her limit or breaking point is.
No kids, which sort of makes wife more prone to throw in the towel. They are not living the lifestyle to which she'd grown accustomed, and despite her hard work, they're barely paying their bills.
Should a r/ship be just about how a mate can lift upi financially?
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Should a r/ship be just about how a mate can lift upi financially? </div></div>
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">No kids, which sort of makes wife more prone to throw in the towel. They are not living the lifestyle to which she'd grown accustomed, and despite her hard work, they're barely paying their bills.
</div></div>
she have a Sub warming up to step in?
When its hot in the jungle of peace I go swimming in the ocean of love.....
In this case the lack of work is no fault of his own -right? If so, you support him/her to try to get back to work. That's when you sit down and go over what needs to be cut out the budget until things normalize. But then again, that is if you are committed to the person.
Now if the person is a lazy bum who does not want to find work that is a whole diff story.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nunya</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Should a r/ship be just about how a mate can lift upi financially? </div></div>
You know it shouldn't be so why ask? </div></div>
I'm asking the opinion of others. She is at the point now where she feels like her partner should be a helpmate- they are middle aged and should be 'further along' in their lives. He has 2 children from his previous marriage (I didnt ask how child support is being handled), and she is angry that this imbalance in their r/ship sets a poor example, and *she* may be the one paying for them in the long run.
The financial piece is now her bottom line- he;s a 'great guy', cares about her and she him, most often, but as they are planning for retirement- his positives dont support her goals. I think she's also concerned that his family/friends may see her as coldhearted and money hungry for her leaning towards parting ways.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: RichD</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">No kids, which sort of makes wife more prone to throw in the towel. They are not living the lifestyle to which she'd grown accustomed, and despite her hard work, they're barely paying their bills.
</div></div>
she have a Sub warming up to step in? </div></div>
I dont know, would that make it more understandable?
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: WeNdY_PeNdY</div><div class="ubbcode-body">In this case the lack of work is no fault of his own -right? If so, you support him/her to try to get back to work. That's when you sit down and go over what needs to be cut out the budget until things normalize. But then again, that is if you are committed to the person.
Now if the person is a lazy bum who does not want to find work that is a whole diff story. </div></div>
He's tried different entrepreneural ventures, but seems averse to working for someone again, due to being burned by the layoff. She's angry that he's used her as a way to try (and not excelled :shh at his dreams, things she supported and tried to get behind for his sake. But if they were not together, his attitude might be different...
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: RichD</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body">No kids, which sort of makes wife more prone to throw in the towel. They are not living the lifestyle to which she'd grown accustomed, and despite her hard work, they're barely paying their bills.
</div></div>
she have a Sub warming up to step in? </div></div>
I dont know, would that make it more understandable? </div></div>
im just trying to figure being on her own she will go back to being able to afford the "style she is accustomed" .
sound to me like she eyeing an option
When its hot in the jungle of peace I go swimming in the ocean of love.....
Ah, I see what you mean. She's coming from a different angle- she's doing it all on her own anyway, why not just eliminate the bad vibes from arguing and the negative energy every morning when she leaves him at home in the morns and returns with knotted stomach in the eves.
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Dear K</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: WeNdY_PeNdY</div><div class="ubbcode-body">In this case the lack of work is no fault of his own -right? If so, you support him/her to try to get back to work. That's when you sit down and go over what needs to be cut out the budget until things normalize. But then again, that is if you are committed to the person.
Now if the person is a lazy bum who does not want to find work that is a whole diff story. </div></div>
He's tried different entrepreneural ventures, but seems averse to working for someone again, due to being burned by the layoff. She's angry that he's used her as a way to try (and not excelled :shh at his dreams, things she supported and tried to get behind for his sake. But if they were not together, his attitude might be different... </div></div>
Hmnnnn..complacency seems to be setting in.
I still say she can use some "reverse psychology" here. If he enjoys certain privileges now , she should cut them off to prove a point without being argumentative. This is simple but just giving as an example: She cooks steak dinners regularly. Because of the one income, explain to him that steak is off the table because they now can only afford chicken back.
Would him being employed and her not be a "for worse" situation? If his income allowed them to meet her lifestyle needs would it be a problem to the relationship?
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: WeNdY_PeNdY</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Hmnnnn..complacency seems to be setting in.
I still say she can use some "reverse psychology" here. If he enjoys certain privileges now , she should cut them off to prove a point without being argumentative. This is simple but just giving as an example: She cooks steak dinners regularly. Because of the one income, explain to him that steak is off the table because they now can only afford chicken back. </div></div>
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It is really taking a toll on their relationship. How long would you stay in a 'for worse' situation?
She's angry that he's used her as a way to try (and not excelled :shh
at his dreams, things she supported and tried to get behind for his sake. But if they were not together, his attitude might be different...
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