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By Peter M
We got married in 1993. We both wanted kids. Early 1994 she fell pregnant and all was well. Late 1994 she gave birth to our son. Two years later she gave birth to our eldest daughter and all was well. We had a discussion and I tabled the notion that two was enough. She wanted more kids but after discussing financials and careers (she is a trained phlebotomist) we finally agreed that two was enough. I could see that she was resentful but decided to play dumb. Other considerations had crept in. Regular readers of the board will see me post �male chauvinistic� comments on occasion. These comments are usually in response to a pro-female post and are so outrageously chauvinistic that they are instantly recognisable for what they are � a wind-up. I am a far cry from a chauvinist but my wife seemed hell-bent on turning the clock back 50 years and become a �hausfrau�. She saw me as the breadwinner and herself as a baby-making machine. She is also by nature lazy. As far as she was concerned her �job� was looking after the children while I went to work. This would not have been so bad if she actually did some �housework� (i.e. cooking & cleaning) but that part of it wasn�t to her taste. I am quite lazy myself but I will not live in squalor so after coming home from work I found myself having to clean the house as well. This led to arguments. The arguments were then fuelled by her demanding more kids and me demanding she get off her arse and go back to work. Finally the inevitable �accident� happened. I got a phone call at work from her telling me she was pregnant again. �I don�t know how it happened� she wails. Yeah, right! I am outwardly angry but inwardly resigned. We have another discussion and she suggests that she should be sterilised. I agree but I am confused as it is far easier for me to be sterilised but she insists she have it done after the child is born and she has finished feeding it. I found out why after our youngest daughter was born. I, my wife and our two older children are brown-eyed, brown-haired and similar featured. Our youngest has blonde hair; blue eyes and is totally different in looks to the other two. This child isn�t even mine!!! Nevertheless I treat her as my own. By this time my feelings for my wife have changed. �I am merely going through the motions� as a husband but I feel that I should pretend for the sake of the kids. My wife and I had drifted a fair way apart when she announces that she�s going to be sterilised. She makes the appointment but is turned away because she is again pregnant! Now I know this child is not mine, as we hadn�t had sex for months. We have a huge row. I tell her �At the end of the day it�s your body and you decide. I would advise an abortion. If you do decide to have it then I will have a blood test taken because I am sure that the child is not mine� She has a termination done and is sterilised. The damage is done however and our relationship has all but ended. I still keep up the happy families pretence for the sake of the kids. While I am going to work she is becoming less and less discreet with her lovers and I finally get to hear about the long line of men coming to our house while I�m at work. Right, enough is enough! I start to gather evidence for a divorce. While I am gathering it she comes and confesses her affairs to me. She begs my forgiveness. I put brain into �what�s good for the kids� mode again and agree. I also set up PIR-activated video camera in bedroom, bugged the phone and wrote a port monitor to capture MSN Messenger & ICQ conversations on our computer. To my surprise she was behaving herself. But what I didn�t realise was that she was stealing/mis-appropriating money from out joint bank account and putting it into her new secretly opened account. I am pretty sloppy when it comes to keeping accounts and as long as I can go to the ATM and get money out I don�t care. (I mention at the top that she�s a trained phlebotomist. She has not done a day�s paid work since 1994 and she is too idle to go and sign on for dole/unemployment insurance) This went on for about 3 months. It could still be going on now but she got too greedy and took enough money for even me to notice. She denied taking money even when I shoved the bank statements under her nose. It turns out that she had still been seeing her regular boyfriend all of the time. I could not throw her out of the house because her name is on the mortgage agreement (even though she has not contributed a penny towards repayment). Also the way the law stands I could not win custody claim for the children because our youngest is too young to be separate from her mother. I could demand a paternity test on my youngest daughter but to be honest I am frightened of the truth. I love her as my daughter and have done so for the past 3 years. To find out officially that she is not mine would be heartbreaking. Recent developments have gone in my favour though. Firstly all of her friends disowned her when they found out what she had done to me. Some even started to attack her verbally & physically. This has driven her into a state of depression and she is on medication for that condition. Finally her boyfriend has decided to dump her and go back to his wife (a consequence of me removing her from our joint bank account, he got fed up of her begging for money) She claimed to be suicidal and to be honest I wasn�t very sympathetic. I am not too concerned that she�ll top herself though, she has a selfish streak a mile wide and to do so would do me a favour.
Well that�s it. Please treat the above with a large pinch of salt. Remember that I could be making all of this up and even if it�s true it is only my side of the story. I do not ask for sympathy or criticism, This post is here merely to inform you why I sometimes get snotty about my wife on the main board. Thank you for your patience.
We got married in 1993. We both wanted kids. Early 1994 she fell pregnant and all was well. Late 1994 she gave birth to our son. Two years later she gave birth to our eldest daughter and all was well. We had a discussion and I tabled the notion that two was enough. She wanted more kids but after discussing financials and careers (she is a trained phlebotomist) we finally agreed that two was enough. I could see that she was resentful but decided to play dumb. Other considerations had crept in. Regular readers of the board will see me post �male chauvinistic� comments on occasion. These comments are usually in response to a pro-female post and are so outrageously chauvinistic that they are instantly recognisable for what they are � a wind-up. I am a far cry from a chauvinist but my wife seemed hell-bent on turning the clock back 50 years and become a �hausfrau�. She saw me as the breadwinner and herself as a baby-making machine. She is also by nature lazy. As far as she was concerned her �job� was looking after the children while I went to work. This would not have been so bad if she actually did some �housework� (i.e. cooking & cleaning) but that part of it wasn�t to her taste. I am quite lazy myself but I will not live in squalor so after coming home from work I found myself having to clean the house as well. This led to arguments. The arguments were then fuelled by her demanding more kids and me demanding she get off her arse and go back to work. Finally the inevitable �accident� happened. I got a phone call at work from her telling me she was pregnant again. �I don�t know how it happened� she wails. Yeah, right! I am outwardly angry but inwardly resigned. We have another discussion and she suggests that she should be sterilised. I agree but I am confused as it is far easier for me to be sterilised but she insists she have it done after the child is born and she has finished feeding it. I found out why after our youngest daughter was born. I, my wife and our two older children are brown-eyed, brown-haired and similar featured. Our youngest has blonde hair; blue eyes and is totally different in looks to the other two. This child isn�t even mine!!! Nevertheless I treat her as my own. By this time my feelings for my wife have changed. �I am merely going through the motions� as a husband but I feel that I should pretend for the sake of the kids. My wife and I had drifted a fair way apart when she announces that she�s going to be sterilised. She makes the appointment but is turned away because she is again pregnant! Now I know this child is not mine, as we hadn�t had sex for months. We have a huge row. I tell her �At the end of the day it�s your body and you decide. I would advise an abortion. If you do decide to have it then I will have a blood test taken because I am sure that the child is not mine� She has a termination done and is sterilised. The damage is done however and our relationship has all but ended. I still keep up the happy families pretence for the sake of the kids. While I am going to work she is becoming less and less discreet with her lovers and I finally get to hear about the long line of men coming to our house while I�m at work. Right, enough is enough! I start to gather evidence for a divorce. While I am gathering it she comes and confesses her affairs to me. She begs my forgiveness. I put brain into �what�s good for the kids� mode again and agree. I also set up PIR-activated video camera in bedroom, bugged the phone and wrote a port monitor to capture MSN Messenger & ICQ conversations on our computer. To my surprise she was behaving herself. But what I didn�t realise was that she was stealing/mis-appropriating money from out joint bank account and putting it into her new secretly opened account. I am pretty sloppy when it comes to keeping accounts and as long as I can go to the ATM and get money out I don�t care. (I mention at the top that she�s a trained phlebotomist. She has not done a day�s paid work since 1994 and she is too idle to go and sign on for dole/unemployment insurance) This went on for about 3 months. It could still be going on now but she got too greedy and took enough money for even me to notice. She denied taking money even when I shoved the bank statements under her nose. It turns out that she had still been seeing her regular boyfriend all of the time. I could not throw her out of the house because her name is on the mortgage agreement (even though she has not contributed a penny towards repayment). Also the way the law stands I could not win custody claim for the children because our youngest is too young to be separate from her mother. I could demand a paternity test on my youngest daughter but to be honest I am frightened of the truth. I love her as my daughter and have done so for the past 3 years. To find out officially that she is not mine would be heartbreaking. Recent developments have gone in my favour though. Firstly all of her friends disowned her when they found out what she had done to me. Some even started to attack her verbally & physically. This has driven her into a state of depression and she is on medication for that condition. Finally her boyfriend has decided to dump her and go back to his wife (a consequence of me removing her from our joint bank account, he got fed up of her begging for money) She claimed to be suicidal and to be honest I wasn�t very sympathetic. I am not too concerned that she�ll top herself though, she has a selfish streak a mile wide and to do so would do me a favour.
Well that�s it. Please treat the above with a large pinch of salt. Remember that I could be making all of this up and even if it�s true it is only my side of the story. I do not ask for sympathy or criticism, This post is here merely to inform you why I sometimes get snotty about my wife on the main board. Thank you for your patience.
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