Domestic Violence

**Boopie2** · 05-03-2007, 11:13 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

I heard them today talking about domestic violence on Micheal Baisden's show today. I thought about my friend right away [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70361-embarassed.gif[/img] I also heard one author speaking about the book she wrote being a victim to violence herself. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70384-praying.gif[/img] It broke my heart also when the kids were calling in telling about their abusive parent. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img]

**Suesumba** · 05-04-2007, 09:44 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

man that was rough. i don't think i'd be strong enuff to want to live if that happened to me. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

**Boopie2** · 05-04-2007, 10:27 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

I was on my way home listening to this author who was in an abusive relationship and got out of it. I didn't hear the whole program but she said wrote the book inspired by her own abusive relationship as well of her friend that was killed by her abuser. I think she said her friend was at her aunts funeral and as they were lowering her body into the grave her ex boyfriend and said "If I can't have you nobody will: he shot her in the head then ran in the woods nearby and shot and killed himself. Another relative in her family was shot and killed by an abuser but I didn't quite catch that story.

**ZaraJah** · 05-04-2007, 11:05 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

This is sad beyond measure. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

I do not take any form of violence lightly (especially in relationships) and never see any form of force to be a joke. IT IS SICK, SICK, SICK for adults who have this problem not to seek professional help. S I C K!!!!!!! [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/mad2.gif[/img]

That is why I will continue to take the [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/throwstone.gif[/img] more times than not here, for denouncing and labeling violence in any way, shape or form as DYSFUNCTIONAL in relationships, when people talk/brag about what they do to inflict pain (whether emotional, verbal or physical) on their SO. It makes me copiously sick to my stomach.

I feel sick not only because I know that it will only be a matter of time when what is mislabeled as "play fight" will turn into what it really is...domestic violence, but also because I know people globally are reading and using the information as a source... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

**Suesumba** · 05-04-2007, 11:09 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Zarah</div><div class="ubbcode-body">IT IS SICK, SICK, SICK for adults who have this problem not to seek professional help. S I C K!!!!!!! </div></div>

problem. they don't know or will not acknowledge that they're sick. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

**ZaraJah** · 05-04-2007, 11:14 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: SueSumba</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Zarah</div><div class="ubbcode-body">IT IS SICK, SICK, SICK for adults who have this problem not to seek professional help. S I C K!!!!!!! </div></div>

problem. they don't know or will not acknowledge that they're sick. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img] </div></div>

Exactly! And when someone recognizes it and try to tell them, they pounce (as a group) on you and call you names that not even your worse enemy would.

It is NOT FUNNY!!!!! Who is next? WHO???? We all have a responsibility to ask ourselves WHY. Why do we do it? Why don't we notice that it is not right and why do we refuse to get help?

These are some of the same people who would run to the doctor at the first sign of a hang nail but will never go and see one for such a critical illness. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

**MrsBlue** · 05-04-2007, 11:45 AM

Re: Domestic Violence

<span style="color: #3333FF">But what kind of help is there for abusers? I don't know of anything that has been proven to work. Abuser groups can turn into victim-bashing events. Can you imagine getting a group of abusive-people together in one room? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

DV is a systemic issue. While there are cases of women abusing men, most times it is the reverse and it has a lot to with women being considered property and objects. </span>

**ZaraJah** · 05-04-2007, 12:05 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Blueness</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> <span style="color: #3333FF">But what kind of help is there for abusers? I don't know of anything that has been proven to work. Abuser groups can turn into victim-bashing events. Can you imagine getting a group of abusive-people together in one room? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

DV is a systemic issue. While there are cases of women abusing men, most times it is the reverse and it has a lot to with women being considered property and objects. </span> </div></div>

I know of a remedy for abusers. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/cool.gif[/img]

One cannot expect to re-habilitate that which was never habilitated. I don't have the answer but all I know is that any man (or woman) who will have the nerve to step to me in a violent manner WILL get remedied. PERIOD!!!!

Every illness has a cure but the first step to healing, lies with the individual admitting that s/he has an illness. Those who can't hear, tend to feel...

There is some truth there, but you'd be surprised to know that there are many more cases of women abusing men than you could ever imagine. I wonder if those women consider those men property or objects?

The blame and historical justifications need to STOP. Every man and woman who abuse and/or think they have anger management issues that can lead to abuse should seek help. If they do not know that they are sick, they at least KNOW THAT THEY ARE DIFFERENT AND SHOULD SEEK URGENT HELP!

**Boopie2** · 05-04-2007, 12:06 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Blueness</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> <span style="color: #3333FF">But what kind of help is there for abusers? I don't know of anything that has been proven to work. Abuser groups can turn into victim-bashing events. Can you imagine getting a group of abusive-people together in one room? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

DV is a systemic issue. While there are cases of women abusing men, most times it is the reverse and it has a lot to with women being considered property and objects. </span> </div></div>

The radio show gave out numbers and some doctor and policeman was suppose to come on but I had to leave my car and go to the store. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70402-thinking.gif[/img] They also had abusers calling into the show as well.

**MrsBlue** · 05-04-2007, 12:11 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Zarah</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Blueness</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> <span style="color: #3333FF">But what kind of help is there for abusers? I don't know of anything that has been proven to work. Abuser groups can turn into victim-bashing events. Can you imagine getting a group of abusive-people together in one room? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

DV is a systemic issue. While there are cases of women abusing men, most times it is the reverse and it has a lot to with women being considered property and objects. </span> </div></div>

I know of a remedy for abusers. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/cool.gif[/img]

One cannot expect to re-habilitate that which was never habilitated. I don't have the answer but all I know is that any man (or woman) who will have the nerve to step to me in a violent manner WILL get remedied. PERIOD!!!!

Every illness has a cure but the first step to healing, lies with the individual admitting that s/he has an illness. Those who can't hear, tend to feel...

There is some truth there, but you'd be surprised to know that there are many more cases of women abusing men than you could ever imagine. I wonder if those women consider those men property or objects?

The blame and historical justifications need to STOP. Every man and woman who abuse and/or think they have anger management issues that can lead to abuse should seek help. If they do not know that they are sick, they at least KNOW THAT THEY ARE DIFFERENT AND SHOULD SEEK URGENT HELP! </div></div> <span style="color: #3333FF">I know that there are many more females that abuse males than are, or ever will be, reported. I don't have an answer as to why that happens.

I was not providing justification, what I was saying is that while on an individual level, the man needs to take responsibility, on a societal level the subjection of women goes a long way towards making men feel that their woman is their property and they therefore have the right to do as they will. </span>

**ZaraJah** · 05-04-2007, 12:47 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> =Blueness
I was not providing justification, what I was saying is that while on an individual level, the man needs to take responsibility, on a societal level the subjection of women goes a long way towards making men feel that their woman is their property and they therefore have the right to do as they will. </div></div>

No, no. My "justification" comment was not directed at you at all.

Men are free to feel whatever they chose to feel as far as "property" and whatever is concerned.

My issue is with the increasing number of women who are not being more responsible for what they are ALLOWING men to feel they can do to them.

I know about the many excuses and justifications, but when are "those" women going to take some of the responsibility and vow to break that hideous cycle that seem to go on from generation to generation?

Where will it end if it is not with the victim? The abuser seem to enjoy doing what they are doing so why aren't the victims saying enough is enough and DO SOMETHING IT (other than running from shelter to shelter and then putting up bail). [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img]

**MarieK** · 05-04-2007, 01:23 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Zarah</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> "play fight" </div></div>

What do you consider play fight

**ZaraJah** · 05-04-2007, 01:26 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Zarah</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> "play fight" </div></div>

What do you consider play fight

</div></div>

Pushing, Shoving, Scratching etc., where one is not necessarily overpowering the other, but pain is being inflicted.

If challenged, one or the other would justify the visible scars by saying "well, s/he was only playing when..." or "it was all in fun, we make up later" or something similar.

**MarieK** · 05-04-2007, 01:27 PM

Re: Domestic Violence

My question is why him family is still alive? The man in the article I am talking. Him entiya family wudda dead and mi will guh tell di judge seh mi nah waste tax paya money mi guilty. dyam brite

Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence

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