Tweet
Jackass sey di worl' no level. Jackass sey dem sey de trute wi set yu free, but nuff time if yu chat trute inna bed business it wi jus' set yu free fe galang true life widdouten nobody.
Last week Jackass and all you Jackassites (yeah, cause we a no Labourite or Socialist, Labourer or Socialite, cause nuff time dem deh a [censored]. We a Jackass.) looked at just how the truth will not set you free in court.
But in the bedroom the truth might just set you free.
Free to go to the left or the right, whichever direction you prefer when you are out the front door, with all you own in two scandal bags.
It works on both sides of the plug and socket (and you know we talking about self-lubricated socket and plug that work without battery, cause Jackass and all true Jackassites bun out a plug to plug and socket to socket) that come together for shocking stuff in the bedroom.
Take, for example, a man and a woman have just finished doing the squishy squishy (and no, Jackass is not talking about the dishes. For some, snacking may be involved but anyway). He rolls off, feeling quite proud of himself, already planning how he is going to tell the other fellows how he 'mash de works', and speaks those three words that pass between lovers ever so often.
How was it?
So what does the socket do, if it was not so great, if it was not really shocking out? Does she tell the truth, even gently, saying "you dripped sweat in my eye, you don't know how to rest your weight on your elbows so you squashed me and then thought I was gasping in pleasure when I was really struggling for breath. You chewed my nipples like they were marshmallows, I still feel the pain at the root when you were trying to swallow my tongue. A girl likes a little tap on the rear when she is doing that backfire thing but you started beating me like I was Dr. Ford and a little rude talk is nice but saying 'a gwine kill yu dutty r..s wid f..k is taking it a bit too far".
"Apart from that, honey, it was OK."
Chances are she would get a straight left, well, two. One from the hand, the other as the door slams. So she does what Mommy and her sistrens told her to do from looooong time. She says it was good, either outright or by her actions. The first strategy is the one we all know ("you are the best honey" or "you tiger you" or those three special words every man loves to hear, "oh me Gad"), but the second one is a bit more complicated.
Instead of saying outright that the asker was da bomb on the posturpedic, that he almost made the divan go splat, she just throws a leg over him and purrs. She just snuggles into him and says 'mmmmmmm'. Now, she did not outright lie, but what is a man who asks a woman if the sex was good and gets that response to think?
Then five months later she says you are not reading me.
Jackass sey de worl' no level. Jackass sey book an magazine an newspaper fi read, people whe get dem mout fi chat mus'chat
Comment