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We never know the full story of anyone's marriage, but do you think you would publicly discuss your husband's indiscretions? In Mrs Sanfords' case, maybe she had no choice, since she wasnt his 'soul' mate, but there are other public cases where the wife stands by the men, especially at the very beginning.
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This is the case I was thinking of - 2004- Gay governor- wife standing by his side at the press conference
N.J. Governor Resigns Over Gay Affair
McGreevey Has Been Facing Other Political Problems
By Michael Powell and Michelle Garcia
Washington Post Staff Writers
Friday, August 13, 2004; Page A01TRENTON, N.J., Aug. 12 -- Gov. James E. McGreevey resigned Thursday, announcing that he had an affair with a man and that it had left him vulnerable to "false allegations and threats of disclosure."
"My truth is that I am a gay American," the married father of two said at a news conference at the State House here. "This, the 47th year of my life, is arguably too late to have this discussion. But . . . at a point in every person's life, one has to look deeply into the mirror of one's soul."
McGreevey's voice hitched several times but he retained his composure. He said that his affair had brought great pain to his wife, Dina Matos McGreevey, who stood by his side as he spoke. "I engaged in an adult consensual affair with another man," he said. "It was foolish . . . and for this, I ask forgiveness."
Gov. James E. McGreevey addresses a news conference with his wife, Dina Matos McGreevey, and his mother, Veronica McGreevey, standing nearby. (Daniel Hulshizer -- AP\
The first-term Democrat, who has faced questions about his political ethics recently, said his resignation would take effect Nov. 15. State Senate President Richard J. Codey (D) will become acting governor and serve out the remainder of McGreevey's term, which ends in early 2006. Had McGreevey resigned immediately, state law would have required a special election within two months.
Golan Cipel, McGreevey's former lover, served in the governor's administration and earned $110,000 a year as homeland security adviser, several New Jersey political sources said. But Cipel, a published poet and a native of Israel, resigned after it was discovered that he had exaggerated his credentials, and he has since moved from one politically connected business to another.
Cipel, 33, threatened this week to publicize his affair with McGreevey, said a former aide to the governor. The aide and others in Trenton said Cipel is expected to file a sexual-harassment lawsuit against McGreevey this week. Washington Post reporters' efforts to reach Cipel for comment were unsuccessful.
"New Jersey isn't the Bible Belt," said Cliff Zukin, a professor of public policy at Rutgers University. "The governor only told us he was gay because he knew something untenable was coming down the road."
McGreevey faces other political problems. In the past two months, federal prosecutors in Newark have indicted two men who are top fundraisers for him. McGreevey's name appears 83 times in the indictment of one of the men, and Cipel recently worked for the other fundraiser.
"Could McGreevey have survived outing himself? Probably," said Jon Shure, a top aide to a former Democratic governor. "But he had no political capital left in his bank."
Still, the governor's pained talk of his lifelong denial of his sexuality was riveting for gays who watched the televised news conference. "If you're a member of New Jersey's lesbian and gay community, you didn't watch the governor's speech today with political or legal eyes -- you watched it with personal eyes. We all know how difficult it is to come out as openly gay, whether to family or other loved ones," said Steven Goldstein, chairman of Garden State Equality, a gay advocacy group.
When he was elected governor in 2001, McGreevey seemed possessed of a golden touch. He was athletic and handsome, with a boyish face that shaved 10 years off his age. A product of a working-class family, he attended parochial schools and volunteered for many things. He would graduate from Columbia University and Georgetown Law School and later add a master's from Harvard.
He married, had a daughter and got divorced. After he lost his first race for governor against Republican Christine Todd Whitman in 1997, McGreevey met Dina Matos, a Catholic from Newark's Portuguese Catholic Ironbound neighborhood. They married and had a daughter.
It seemed perfect, but McGreevey spoke of another reality. "From my early days in school until the present day, I acknowledged some feelings, a certain sense that separated me from others," he said. "But because of my resolve . . . I forced what I thought was an acceptable reality onto myself, a reality which is layered . . . with all the, quote, 'good things.' "
In fact, rumors had long circulated about McGreevey's sexual identity. Political insiders debated whether he was gay, and many spoke of how the governor could be utterly engaging one moment and distant the next. "It always seemed there was a story behind his story," said David Rebovich, managing director of the Rider Institute for New Jersey Politics. "It seemed to close observers that Jim McGreevey was haunted by something."
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Eliot Spitzer's wife was none to pleased after his prostitution scandal, but she was there for the press conference- are they still married?
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Some women are so desperate to "have a man" that they will put up with anything.
I don't know too many Black women who would be THAT desperate.
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is it desperation thoughOriginally posted by Tropicana View PostSome women are so desperate to "have a man" that they will put up with anything.
I don't know too many Black women who would be THAT desperate.
many of these woman are "good catches" themselves and would have no troubles landing another. man no all dat scarce and we keep saying.
i think the reason why we see so many women sticking by their men in the beginning is bcus its easier. imagine she is hurting by this betrayal but not only that, now the whole world is watching as her world come crashing down. a smart woman builds her house. so if even till the dust settles its best to assume the role of forgiving wife...
while ur hurt is still fresh you wont have to be answering to the press about what went wrong in your marriage. all you have to do is knod and smile and say your standing by your husband and that your gonna work through this. no need to show the world the mad crazy B behind that beautiful smile.Comment
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I immediately thought of Magic Johnson and his wife, and they are STILL going strong after the most severe consequence of his betrayalOriginally posted by Tropicana View PostSome women are so desperate to "have a man" that they will put up with anything.
I don't know too many Black women who would be THAT desperate.
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