Do you think this is okay?

[Green_Biscuit]

While driving home tonight, I turned onto my street to drive the last mile home. There is a funeral parlor on the corner, and you can always tell when there is a wake/viewing in progress, because their parking lot is not large enough, and the cars overflow to the church lot across the street. I make sure to go extra slow when I notice this, as there is usually a steady stream of people back and forth. Sure enough, there are plenty coming and going....but the thing that caused me to brake was seeing two woman, exiting the parlor, with street shorts (modest but shorts nonetheless) and flat sandals, and basically, nice tees on! I was floored! (not to mention the one talking on the cell phone). Does anyone else think this is appropriate? Granted is is hot and muggy, but, if I couldn't get home to change, I wouldn't go....just seems so disrespectful to me. What do you think?

[SandiF]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

Appropriate to who...what? The dead? Tradition?

Though I typically wear the customary black to a funeral, I do not think any one should be bound by this tradition. People should feel free to celebrate/mourn the dead in any way they feel comfortable. Why be bound by tradition? Maybe that's what the dead requested -- no black please, come as you wish.

[Seveen]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

GB - my dad's funeral was at a funeral parlor and because it wasn't at church - if we laid him out at church it would have imploded - it was anything goes

we played music - we drank - we danced - kinda like a Jamaican nine night - and did the things he did in life

at one point we debated changing his clothes for each viewing (he was a dapper dresser) - or instead of a casket - using the lounge chair he always fell asleep in as one - and we would tickle his feet to see if he was really dead

the back of his "prayer" card had all the words to "as long as you live in this house you will follow the rules" - i think i heard that everyday for 18 years - got my own house pretty early

so - we sent my dad out in style - his style - he couldn't see what anyone was wearing and we didn't care either

even played "When The Saints Go Marching In" to include his Louisana heritage

next time in Jamaica - go to a Nine Night - and be prepared to party and drink white rum

dead = no worries for sure [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[nursey]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

Originally posted by SandiF:
[qb] Appropriate to who...what? The dead? Tradition?

Though I typically wear the customary black to a funeral, I do not think any one should be bound by this tradition. People should feel free to celebrate/mourn the dead in any way they feel comfortable. Why be bound by tradition? Maybe that's what the dead requested -- no black please, come as you wish. [/qb]

I agree. Maybe the dead was someone in their late teens or early twenties and this was how he or she would have wanted their friends to dress. Just because they were dressed that way does not mean that they mourn the loss of the person any less than someone who is dressed traditionally.

[Yvonne N.]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

GB said:

....just seems so disrespectful to me. What do you think?

If it's the wake/viewing, people tend to be less relaxed about the rules but on the day of the funeral, respect for the dead is defintely a consideration and that can be shown in many ways.

Here, the family members who sit together in the church usually wear the same colour as decided by the family for the occasion...be it funereal or pastel. Others are free to join in if they wish or wear their own choice...in good taste.

Nice question.

[kia027]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

gb i feel u on the short shorts, tee shirt & flip flops..

i think if they wanted to go very casual (which I have no problem with) they could have wore a long skirt with a blouse & flip slops.. still casual yet more modest and less offensive to perhaps older relatives at the parlor..

[Kumtecky]

Re: Do you think this is okay?

Originally posted by K i a:
[qb] gb i feel u on the short shorts, tee shirt & flip flops..

i think if they wanted to go very casual (which I have no problem with) they could have wore a long skirt with a blouse & flip slops.. still casual yet more modest and less offensive to perhaps older relatives at the parlor.. [/qb]

I agree also, I can tolerate jeans, but shorts is a bit extreme. There has to be some limits.