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Portmore and Ctry and couple a we well from down a Board Lane a sid down under one biggg shadey mango tree down a Coodeh….when Ctry start chat bout how people cyan chat bad….
CTRY – bwoy paady some people cyan chat badd een man…, kiss me neckback!! Why dem cyan talk proper and nice like you een Paady, u talk so nice, anyway u memba when we did a pickney and old time people use to chat nuff proverbs, u know none..,
PORTMORE – ohh gosh yes paady…u luv talk bout ole time proverbs een…ok mek a see..,
1. Taking the bucket to the water source each day will eventually result in the demise of the bottom, and
2. In order to succeed, mucous must proceed from your nostrils, and
3. This day is mine, the next day will be yours
4. Hello and thanks do not destroy squares
5. If you cannot get to someone, get to their shirt
CTRY: bwoy Paady, u sound nice sah….u did go nuff school nuh chroo **DWL**
SANDIF – Ms Ctry, I try to speak properly most a de time, but sometimes me slip up….u waan hear proverbs, see some yaa…,
Things break at its weakest point
Hag wash inna the first watah him ketch **see deh it start slip awready** dwl,
cyaan bury man and lef out him foot
CTRY: Sandi, me never hear da one deh from I bawn.., u sure a suh it go,
SANDIF – yes man a so it go, den u never hear da one yaa needda,
stiff starch and dutty blue
Fus watah frag si, him jump inna it
Bucket wid hole battam hab no business a rivaside
ICHES – me nuh business yaa man, me twang when me want and me go inna me lingo when me want…hear dem yaa
Wen yuh de ah Kingston, yuh fi do as dem do!
yuh si de teeth dem, but yuh nuh si im belly!
lard! wen di macka dem reddi fi juk, ah wey yuh ah guh duh?
tricks in trade, matches stick inna biznezz
mine how you drink water, yuh fi use yuh nose.
BRIGADIER HO – ehmmm, no body naa tell de I how fe chat…, caa next ting u sorry for skinny dog,, skinny dog wil turn around and bite you, nuh care ow boar hog try fi hide unda sheep wool-him grunt always betray him.. cockroach mek dance an nevva invite fowl and if yuhh noh mash ants , yuh no fine him guts
JAMAICANDIAMOND – proverbs, wha name so, ohhh a memba now…, u mean like, oh water walk guh ah pumpkin belly, when trouble tek yuh, pickney shut fit yuh…smaddy waan explain wha de fuss one mean…, how me fe know how water walk go a pumpkin belly.., **kissteeth**
HANNAH – ask Ctry she a ole ooman, she muss know…, ok mek a see if a memba one…
Wah fowl waah bakka daag , wen ihm get ih, him halla 'creng'
BANDILERO – **wander whey Hannah hear datdeh, me never hear dat yet*** well, dem two yaa a did me granny favorites, me cyan feget dem.
Skawnful dawg nyam dutty pudd'n
Nevva si cum si!
CHAKA CHAKA – fe me granny too did love use dem yaa..,
Every dog have him day, and every puss have im 4 o'clock
one one coco full basket
NYABEE/BYNGHIMAN – me know unu nuh memba me, a me same one Nyabee, is dis a proverb, me nuh too sure, but me memba a hear it..,
Why we feed di babies en di chiren stilla cry
You haffi walk crookid feh go strait
Nevva redeye feh people siten
Bird cyan fly pon one wing
CHICKIE – speaking of twang…yessiday me a watch hill and gully ride and dem ask wan man how him find him community .... hear him nuh ..... “well I tink di place in very interested” me DWL
dem me did a watch one feacha pon child abuse and dem ask wan ooman har views pon it she seh “well as a parents .... “ me did a DWL
Unu tink a joke, one time pon tv me hear one bredda “him guh out inna di wata and next ting me know him drownded” one next time, dem some ppl did a demonstrate bout some land and wan man have wan placard seh “di land to deer “ no sah…Ja tv tek ie cake rastafari, jah know.., DWL
CTRY: den Chickie, u neen know say a NY we get we likkle hill and gully ride to, yes chile…from Friday night to Sunday., we likkle j’can news, sports, comedy and ting…, wooiiieeeee
VENN - Yow, fiya bun fi all ppl who live a NY an get JA TV!!!
777 – fe real enoh Venn, fiya bun fe dem yes…, cha,
MAHKKA – well now dat we live in a time weh everybaddy worlwide proud bout dem heritage and culcha. Yet wi trivialize and even scorn it in Jamaica more dan Merica, Unu tink ja should declare patois an official language?????
EVANOVITCH – DWL, lawd gad misses, di reason mi laffing is because u know how much people already nuh understanding wha de djs dem a say, wooiiieeee
PORTMORE - Mahkka, me only have one question fe u enoh….wah mek yu always a jook mi inna mi foot battam soh much when mi likkle bit an a run roun di place bare foot? Cha,
NiceNurse – baxside…all me haffe say is…a nuff a de stoosh people dem wudda fennay DWL. ….but talking dat…me have one question fe ask unu.., and btw..while I have unu attention why so much people like blame dem "childhood" fe dis and dat. Listen up! U R NOT A CHILD anymore. GROW THE HELL UP and assume your adults responsibilities and stand up and own up to the decisions YOU'VE made. ...and while your'e there, stop watching those dayuuum daytime TV shows and getting ridiculous ideas.
Enuff is enuff areddy!!!
QK – same ting me say Nurse, imagine, my OWN BROTHER told me that I didn't know what it was like growing up in "that house"... me say which house?? den nuh de same house me grow up inna to.., **caca*** EVERYBODY had a rough childhood! Get over it,
Mankind – a true man, it come in like people who smoke, unu nuh hear say dem waan sue tobacco company.., nutten nuh fe guh suh, a suh me see it, a nuh dem tell u fe smoke, **kissteeth***
LADY Z – all me waan duh is tell ms undercover fe tap dun off me text dem, and email me,
UNDERCOVER – as soon as u gi me me tings dem, whey me tings dem deh
HO – ehh…unu memba de babylon bwoy dem search me wha day and find one rachet knife and charge me wid concealing weapon…well de judge throw out dat and say is nawt a weapon an gi back mi knife now im suing the police for illegal search an suing the province for malicious prosecution
SINCO - gwaan thru ya boss..ah should ah do the same ting couple months back when dem pull mi ova...but mi mind wasn't ah think..lik dem boss (anyway dem gimme back mi rachet same time an neva charge mi fe nuttin)
NiceNurse – u know say unu must be more kind to unu one another…. Een, imagine, When was the last time you, Held someone else's baby (I mean a likkle baby) Had a conversation with a old person (60-100 yrs old) that is not your family? or Speak to a child that is not a family member or family friend?
KingDahjah - Me nuh like hold odder ppl baby….me fraid me might drap dem,
BOOPIE – caa me grow wid old people, me have nuff patience fe dem, me get along more wid dem dan me own age,
COMPRY – well me nuh know bout unu, but I need to stay away from newborns…larks dem smell good een, and modders day de odder day me and me frens mom was on de phone for a long time,
SWEETSOPP – well it seem like everytime me deh a bus stop me and old people dem a get into a conversation…
HO – well me nuh too inna nuh old people rasta…me find wan new girlfren doe..and guess wha she name, Sum Yung Ho ~~~~woooiiiieeeeee~~~~
KingDahjah – so HO u tell har u a HO to, DWL, woooiiee,
BOOPIE – man some ppl have some breed a nick name esee….u know me did have one fren name PieFace,
NUETRAL – dat a nuh nutten, me did know a guy dem called f....fowl,for obvious reasons (no lie….) lawd gad,
OCHIGAL – dammmm, well me know a Roundhead (self explanatory), and Blacka (the guy was dark!)
SWEETSOPP – me did know one bredda dem call him Rottin Benbow.......he had the uglies grey hair and he use to polish it with shoe polish, no lie,
Boopie – Me did know dis girl dem call Peaches cause dem say har batty did shape like a peach, (fawt)
MAGIC MAN – den me nuh did know a pork chop, de bredda face did fat and always greasy
TIGRR – me did know dis bredda dem call dodo, (yuck)
KingDahjah – Tiggrr a u dat….gal is whey u was all dis lang time….kiss me false teeth, so wah a gwaan my girl,
TIGRR – larks man, me miss you too esee. My puter neen a work enoh, me did haffe go buy a next one, den me did have a crappy job in Supervision that was sucking the life out of me. Both have changed and I missed you guys bad bad…so wha u have fe me,
COOLCAT – a ongly hope dem nuh hangle u like dem did do me wha day, imagine, one a me bredren dem invite me fe dinner and when me look inna me plate, nuh one chicken batty me see…, me jess get up right deh so rasta, mek up some fawt and juss leff Iyah, me say some ppl esee, cha
SISTACAF – u nat serrus.. but u know say dat was me mommies fav part a de chicken,
GENEVA – lawd gad unu mek me waan fe vammit
MANKIND – maybe dem waan u confess to something… Dem say wen you eat chicken batty it mek yu chat nuff
COOLCAT – no Iyah, dat deh part a chicken fe dash whey,
SISTA D – bwoy Coolcat, me sarry fe hear enoh…..u shudda did deh wid me dis weekend…, ***kinpuppalick*** me say me bredda I had the BEST weekend ever in a very long time! DE BEST hostess award goes to (((((yardy))))) **bigup** and her three fine men really added to the fun!, man great music, fantastic food, and excellent company! And no chicken batty.., DWL
777 – u mean say she mek u draps…and never send me none….cho, me screw fe dat enoh.
MANKIND – a dat me like hear enoh….man and man coming together and enjoying life.., **bigup**
PEPPER – me naa go no whey ever, gas price dem too high man, me a go boycott dem baxside and tap buy gas.., a how much unu a pay now…. A $1.95 - $2.15 fe Regular and $2.17 - $2.31 fe Premium, enoh, no sah, dem gone too far now man…
MILO MAN - Gas up here in Toronto is about $2.48 USD per gallon (we haffe go start ride bicycle, caa dis a farrin, donkey cyan guh pon treet)
LIKKLE KAY – me deh yaa a watch dem enoh…. A $2.05-$2.10 regular and $2.15-$3.00 premium
COLES – regular is $2:03 - $2:15, me did too fraid fe look pon de premium sah
REGGAE + - a teef de bush bredda deh a teef de whole a we….I see what bush a duh now…de Record losses on the stock markets, Crude oil prices going through the roof. leadership in Iraq is dropping like flies…bushwacker wants to ruin the economies of the world…mek him gwaan man, every puss have dem 4 o’clock,
TuffSTuff –ENSOME…you husband say u have nuff gas, so me is on me way to fillharup, ok me luv, dem keep up dis, me might haffe go work 3days fe save pon me gas…., o/
PAPI – all who have SUV unu betta go park ie,
BORN JAMAICAN – well unu betta come faas and congratulate me, caa me is now officially a college graduate.., ***kinpuppalick*** it was was so nice the whole family did come fe see me and we nyaam nuff nuff jerk chicken, curry goat, cake and all di trimmings...oh Thank you Jesus...
PEPPER – dats good, dats real good…but now u haffe go fe de MASTERS!!!
EVANOVITCH – ehhh, u know something…unu ever get a 6th sense bout something so strong it mek get up and move.., one time esee me go 8o'clock service one Sunday , Sunday School afterwards and thought to miself dat i would stay for the start of the 11 o'clock service , juss to hear the praise team sing...as i sat there i had the overwhelming urge to go home...finally i gave in to it and when i got home and opened the front door, there was smoke in the passageway...my father had put his handkerchief over his lamp to dry and it was smouldering......and he was fast asleep, not aware of a thing..ah sah...that was MY God's will…dat was the Spirit of God talking...
GREEN BISCUIT - The phenomenon is called by many names, including precognition and ESP. Everyone is born with the ability. As we age, our environment influences us, and begins to block what may be perceived to be “pretend” things. Many people retain vestiges of the ability, some more than others, in various strengths. In addition, there are outside influences, of sorts, that can “help”. People interpret this in different ways – God’s help, Guardian Angel looking out for them, some sort of Guide or Spirit watching over them, etc. The bottom line is, there is more to it than most people realize or acknowledge, and the more open you are to your own precognition
777 – rahtid GB, u sound deep sah…**thinking** Yes I believe that there is a "6th sense" but I too believe that its the spirit of the Lord leading and guiding..it depends on how much u willing to listen
SUSANNA – a same so one time I was coming down to Sacramento from Lake Tahoe about 4am and just as the road start climb into a mountain pass, a pickup truck come up fast behind me, overtake me and force me off the road……about 5 minutes later I rounded a curve and saw the same pickup truck crushed under a huge boulder that had rolled down off the mountain. I still think if that truck hadn't shoved me off the road and taken my place it would have been me under that rock
King Dahjah – dat happen to me all de while. Nuff time supm tell mi nuh fe duh dis ar guh deh so.
Is not no 6th sense eedah. It is a spritual communication. Wish it cudda stay wid me more..,
TIGRR – lawks man, nuff times something delays me in traffic only to see a big accident up ahead…
My spiritual sense seems to involve people I love too. I will get a strong premonition that something is wrong. When I know who it is I immediately offer intercessary prayer. When I feel something is circling about, but do not know who is in danger, I just start praying for everyone who comes to mind.
EVANOVITCH – yes Tigrr, a dat u haffe duh yaa…..u know wha me jussa a memba….when me did likkle and de dumb tings we use to duh….one time enoh, me and mi fren a try get a drink...we were in primary school and figga seh we a go drink like big people...we tief di bokkle of alcohol and a hide a drink it...ongle problem was it was a bokkle of rubbing alcohol **kaka** we neva know seh alcohol is not alcohol ***talk bout dumb*** a lucky ting di fuss sip mek mi spit it out, cause lata awn in life mi get fi know seh drinking rubbing alcohol can be fatal...maybe dats why mi no like drink to dis day
777 – lawd Vanny… u know wha me use to do….me use to roll up any dry leaf and newspaper and light it and sey me a smoke cigarette... Maybe a dat mek me no never try smoking fe true..,
BOOPIE – lawd gad my list is endless….one time my grand mother had gone out for the evening so I was home with my other 3 cousins, anyway I wanted to polish my shoes and we had paste shoe polish. I wanted it to be liquid so it would be easy to apply to my shoes, so I had a bright idea to put the can on the gas stove to heat it. All of a sudden a big stream of fire shot through the can and the shoe polish was on fire! ***ohh lawd*** I was so scared I grabbed the can with my bare hands dropped the can on the linoleum floor….it was covered in brown spots of wax, one next time we nearly wash whey de house wid bubbles from de washing machine…den me black and white spots from Ambi, lawks me really have nuff a dem.., **DWL** one time me almost mek me modder have hawt failure true one bwoy a call him self a write me luv letter…iiee sah,
J-KID – well…me nearly electrocute me self…me nuh guh stick mi finga inna light socket (anybody tell u say me say me is all dere a lie dem a tell) **DWL**
MTNGAL – a suppose a craben me did craben, caaa me weena a try tek cokenat trash and sugga mek gizzada…sinting hat me belly esee..,
CHEF DONJUAN – me did always want walk round wid me pants down, dats all,
PORTMORE – I would stare at the sun till me eyes water every mawning, a musse star trek me did a look fah…
SUNIICA – well a suppose me did craven too, caa one day me tek a Vienna sausage can and put it pon de stove fe heat, de whole can explode every whey…, ***talk bout frighten**
MAHKKA – well I was wha dem call back yard scientist…one day I made my own parachute--out of a bed sheet--and jumped from the top of an ackee tree. I remember thinking, "But wait, mi suppose fi a drop suh faas" Next thing I remember is my granny feeding me some "sweet, sweet sugar and water". Haven't eaten ackee since. ( Mahkka – a de fuss me see dis, I was deding girl) **caca** den afta never nuh ackee fault, woiiieee,
777 - my father used to mek me cook rice and fe de life a me me juss cudden get it right...Him use to get real mad if it putta, putta. So sometimes it tek me all 3tries fe get it right…so u know say a nuff rice did bury outta back right, DWL
YARDY – me try fi fly affa de bathroom tap like batman, aan bruk mi han
SISTAGIRL – something wrang wid unu, unu guess wha… dis weekend me and Ochigal finally meet…..u know it amazes me how you can feel like you know someone and you have never met them…as soon as she walked in I knew it was her…and mek me tell u, she have one gorgeous son deh…kiss me neckbak…I really enjoyed our little meeting…
OCHIGAL – it was a pleasure!!!
Ms MENTION – oyyyy Its party time, JAMAICANDIAMOND its your birthday girl, and we gone pawty like its your birthday..,
KING DAHJAH – anyting u want JamD, anyting at all, juss name it babes, and its all yours..,
PORTMORE – ehhh me have a question….why did the chicken cross de road.
CHICKIE – ohh lawd not again ***rolleyes**
BRUK BAK - Give me ten minutes wid de chicken and mi will find out.
MS POWELL - De fact dat yuh thought dat de chicken crossed de road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity
SUESUMBA - it was ah government conspiracy
JACKIE - what the bloody hell!!!! FYAHHHHHHHHH Fi halll white meat!!!!!
WENDY - a ediat farrin fowl dat, If ah did one yaad fowl him woudda hap on pan di back ah one dumpa truck and hap aff when di truck reach di odda side.
PORTMORE – de whole a unu wrang…me nuh tink so, The chicken crossed the road not because he wanted to but because he knew that the land of opportunities was on the other side. The chicken was therfore forced to cross the road by the system. He crossed the road but he really didn't cross the road. He was kicked over on the other side by the PNP and JLP of the farm house.
****De end****
CTRY – bwoy paady some people cyan chat badd een man…, kiss me neckback!! Why dem cyan talk proper and nice like you een Paady, u talk so nice, anyway u memba when we did a pickney and old time people use to chat nuff proverbs, u know none..,
PORTMORE – ohh gosh yes paady…u luv talk bout ole time proverbs een…ok mek a see..,
1. Taking the bucket to the water source each day will eventually result in the demise of the bottom, and
2. In order to succeed, mucous must proceed from your nostrils, and
3. This day is mine, the next day will be yours
4. Hello and thanks do not destroy squares
5. If you cannot get to someone, get to their shirt
CTRY: bwoy Paady, u sound nice sah….u did go nuff school nuh chroo **DWL**
SANDIF – Ms Ctry, I try to speak properly most a de time, but sometimes me slip up….u waan hear proverbs, see some yaa…,
Things break at its weakest point
Hag wash inna the first watah him ketch **see deh it start slip awready** dwl,
cyaan bury man and lef out him foot
CTRY: Sandi, me never hear da one deh from I bawn.., u sure a suh it go,
SANDIF – yes man a so it go, den u never hear da one yaa needda,
stiff starch and dutty blue
Fus watah frag si, him jump inna it
Bucket wid hole battam hab no business a rivaside
ICHES – me nuh business yaa man, me twang when me want and me go inna me lingo when me want…hear dem yaa
Wen yuh de ah Kingston, yuh fi do as dem do!
yuh si de teeth dem, but yuh nuh si im belly!
lard! wen di macka dem reddi fi juk, ah wey yuh ah guh duh?
tricks in trade, matches stick inna biznezz
mine how you drink water, yuh fi use yuh nose.
BRIGADIER HO – ehmmm, no body naa tell de I how fe chat…, caa next ting u sorry for skinny dog,, skinny dog wil turn around and bite you, nuh care ow boar hog try fi hide unda sheep wool-him grunt always betray him.. cockroach mek dance an nevva invite fowl and if yuhh noh mash ants , yuh no fine him guts
JAMAICANDIAMOND – proverbs, wha name so, ohhh a memba now…, u mean like, oh water walk guh ah pumpkin belly, when trouble tek yuh, pickney shut fit yuh…smaddy waan explain wha de fuss one mean…, how me fe know how water walk go a pumpkin belly.., **kissteeth**
HANNAH – ask Ctry she a ole ooman, she muss know…, ok mek a see if a memba one…
Wah fowl waah bakka daag , wen ihm get ih, him halla 'creng'
BANDILERO – **wander whey Hannah hear datdeh, me never hear dat yet*** well, dem two yaa a did me granny favorites, me cyan feget dem.
Skawnful dawg nyam dutty pudd'n
Nevva si cum si!
CHAKA CHAKA – fe me granny too did love use dem yaa..,
Every dog have him day, and every puss have im 4 o'clock
one one coco full basket
NYABEE/BYNGHIMAN – me know unu nuh memba me, a me same one Nyabee, is dis a proverb, me nuh too sure, but me memba a hear it..,
Why we feed di babies en di chiren stilla cry
You haffi walk crookid feh go strait
Nevva redeye feh people siten
Bird cyan fly pon one wing
CHICKIE – speaking of twang…yessiday me a watch hill and gully ride and dem ask wan man how him find him community .... hear him nuh ..... “well I tink di place in very interested” me DWL
dem me did a watch one feacha pon child abuse and dem ask wan ooman har views pon it she seh “well as a parents .... “ me did a DWL
Unu tink a joke, one time pon tv me hear one bredda “him guh out inna di wata and next ting me know him drownded” one next time, dem some ppl did a demonstrate bout some land and wan man have wan placard seh “di land to deer “ no sah…Ja tv tek ie cake rastafari, jah know.., DWL
CTRY: den Chickie, u neen know say a NY we get we likkle hill and gully ride to, yes chile…from Friday night to Sunday., we likkle j’can news, sports, comedy and ting…, wooiiieeeee
VENN - Yow, fiya bun fi all ppl who live a NY an get JA TV!!!
777 – fe real enoh Venn, fiya bun fe dem yes…, cha,
MAHKKA – well now dat we live in a time weh everybaddy worlwide proud bout dem heritage and culcha. Yet wi trivialize and even scorn it in Jamaica more dan Merica, Unu tink ja should declare patois an official language?????
EVANOVITCH – DWL, lawd gad misses, di reason mi laffing is because u know how much people already nuh understanding wha de djs dem a say, wooiiieeee
PORTMORE - Mahkka, me only have one question fe u enoh….wah mek yu always a jook mi inna mi foot battam soh much when mi likkle bit an a run roun di place bare foot? Cha,
NiceNurse – baxside…all me haffe say is…a nuff a de stoosh people dem wudda fennay DWL. ….but talking dat…me have one question fe ask unu.., and btw..while I have unu attention why so much people like blame dem "childhood" fe dis and dat. Listen up! U R NOT A CHILD anymore. GROW THE HELL UP and assume your adults responsibilities and stand up and own up to the decisions YOU'VE made. ...and while your'e there, stop watching those dayuuum daytime TV shows and getting ridiculous ideas.
Enuff is enuff areddy!!!
QK – same ting me say Nurse, imagine, my OWN BROTHER told me that I didn't know what it was like growing up in "that house"... me say which house?? den nuh de same house me grow up inna to.., **caca*** EVERYBODY had a rough childhood! Get over it,
Mankind – a true man, it come in like people who smoke, unu nuh hear say dem waan sue tobacco company.., nutten nuh fe guh suh, a suh me see it, a nuh dem tell u fe smoke, **kissteeth***
LADY Z – all me waan duh is tell ms undercover fe tap dun off me text dem, and email me,
UNDERCOVER – as soon as u gi me me tings dem, whey me tings dem deh
HO – ehh…unu memba de babylon bwoy dem search me wha day and find one rachet knife and charge me wid concealing weapon…well de judge throw out dat and say is nawt a weapon an gi back mi knife now im suing the police for illegal search an suing the province for malicious prosecution
SINCO - gwaan thru ya boss..ah should ah do the same ting couple months back when dem pull mi ova...but mi mind wasn't ah think..lik dem boss (anyway dem gimme back mi rachet same time an neva charge mi fe nuttin)
NiceNurse – u know say unu must be more kind to unu one another…. Een, imagine, When was the last time you, Held someone else's baby (I mean a likkle baby) Had a conversation with a old person (60-100 yrs old) that is not your family? or Speak to a child that is not a family member or family friend?
KingDahjah - Me nuh like hold odder ppl baby….me fraid me might drap dem,
BOOPIE – caa me grow wid old people, me have nuff patience fe dem, me get along more wid dem dan me own age,
COMPRY – well me nuh know bout unu, but I need to stay away from newborns…larks dem smell good een, and modders day de odder day me and me frens mom was on de phone for a long time,
SWEETSOPP – well it seem like everytime me deh a bus stop me and old people dem a get into a conversation…
HO – well me nuh too inna nuh old people rasta…me find wan new girlfren doe..and guess wha she name, Sum Yung Ho ~~~~woooiiiieeeeee~~~~
KingDahjah – so HO u tell har u a HO to, DWL, woooiiee,
BOOPIE – man some ppl have some breed a nick name esee….u know me did have one fren name PieFace,
NUETRAL – dat a nuh nutten, me did know a guy dem called f....fowl,for obvious reasons (no lie….) lawd gad,
OCHIGAL – dammmm, well me know a Roundhead (self explanatory), and Blacka (the guy was dark!)
SWEETSOPP – me did know one bredda dem call him Rottin Benbow.......he had the uglies grey hair and he use to polish it with shoe polish, no lie,
Boopie – Me did know dis girl dem call Peaches cause dem say har batty did shape like a peach, (fawt)
MAGIC MAN – den me nuh did know a pork chop, de bredda face did fat and always greasy
TIGRR – me did know dis bredda dem call dodo, (yuck)
KingDahjah – Tiggrr a u dat….gal is whey u was all dis lang time….kiss me false teeth, so wah a gwaan my girl,
TIGRR – larks man, me miss you too esee. My puter neen a work enoh, me did haffe go buy a next one, den me did have a crappy job in Supervision that was sucking the life out of me. Both have changed and I missed you guys bad bad…so wha u have fe me,
COOLCAT – a ongly hope dem nuh hangle u like dem did do me wha day, imagine, one a me bredren dem invite me fe dinner and when me look inna me plate, nuh one chicken batty me see…, me jess get up right deh so rasta, mek up some fawt and juss leff Iyah, me say some ppl esee, cha
SISTACAF – u nat serrus.. but u know say dat was me mommies fav part a de chicken,
GENEVA – lawd gad unu mek me waan fe vammit
MANKIND – maybe dem waan u confess to something… Dem say wen you eat chicken batty it mek yu chat nuff
COOLCAT – no Iyah, dat deh part a chicken fe dash whey,
SISTA D – bwoy Coolcat, me sarry fe hear enoh…..u shudda did deh wid me dis weekend…, ***kinpuppalick*** me say me bredda I had the BEST weekend ever in a very long time! DE BEST hostess award goes to (((((yardy))))) **bigup** and her three fine men really added to the fun!, man great music, fantastic food, and excellent company! And no chicken batty.., DWL
777 – u mean say she mek u draps…and never send me none….cho, me screw fe dat enoh.
MANKIND – a dat me like hear enoh….man and man coming together and enjoying life.., **bigup**
PEPPER – me naa go no whey ever, gas price dem too high man, me a go boycott dem baxside and tap buy gas.., a how much unu a pay now…. A $1.95 - $2.15 fe Regular and $2.17 - $2.31 fe Premium, enoh, no sah, dem gone too far now man…
MILO MAN - Gas up here in Toronto is about $2.48 USD per gallon (we haffe go start ride bicycle, caa dis a farrin, donkey cyan guh pon treet)
LIKKLE KAY – me deh yaa a watch dem enoh…. A $2.05-$2.10 regular and $2.15-$3.00 premium
COLES – regular is $2:03 - $2:15, me did too fraid fe look pon de premium sah
REGGAE + - a teef de bush bredda deh a teef de whole a we….I see what bush a duh now…de Record losses on the stock markets, Crude oil prices going through the roof. leadership in Iraq is dropping like flies…bushwacker wants to ruin the economies of the world…mek him gwaan man, every puss have dem 4 o’clock,
TuffSTuff –ENSOME…you husband say u have nuff gas, so me is on me way to fillharup, ok me luv, dem keep up dis, me might haffe go work 3days fe save pon me gas…., o/
PAPI – all who have SUV unu betta go park ie,
BORN JAMAICAN – well unu betta come faas and congratulate me, caa me is now officially a college graduate.., ***kinpuppalick*** it was was so nice the whole family did come fe see me and we nyaam nuff nuff jerk chicken, curry goat, cake and all di trimmings...oh Thank you Jesus...
PEPPER – dats good, dats real good…but now u haffe go fe de MASTERS!!!
EVANOVITCH – ehhh, u know something…unu ever get a 6th sense bout something so strong it mek get up and move.., one time esee me go 8o'clock service one Sunday , Sunday School afterwards and thought to miself dat i would stay for the start of the 11 o'clock service , juss to hear the praise team sing...as i sat there i had the overwhelming urge to go home...finally i gave in to it and when i got home and opened the front door, there was smoke in the passageway...my father had put his handkerchief over his lamp to dry and it was smouldering......and he was fast asleep, not aware of a thing..ah sah...that was MY God's will…dat was the Spirit of God talking...
GREEN BISCUIT - The phenomenon is called by many names, including precognition and ESP. Everyone is born with the ability. As we age, our environment influences us, and begins to block what may be perceived to be “pretend” things. Many people retain vestiges of the ability, some more than others, in various strengths. In addition, there are outside influences, of sorts, that can “help”. People interpret this in different ways – God’s help, Guardian Angel looking out for them, some sort of Guide or Spirit watching over them, etc. The bottom line is, there is more to it than most people realize or acknowledge, and the more open you are to your own precognition
777 – rahtid GB, u sound deep sah…**thinking** Yes I believe that there is a "6th sense" but I too believe that its the spirit of the Lord leading and guiding..it depends on how much u willing to listen
SUSANNA – a same so one time I was coming down to Sacramento from Lake Tahoe about 4am and just as the road start climb into a mountain pass, a pickup truck come up fast behind me, overtake me and force me off the road……about 5 minutes later I rounded a curve and saw the same pickup truck crushed under a huge boulder that had rolled down off the mountain. I still think if that truck hadn't shoved me off the road and taken my place it would have been me under that rock
King Dahjah – dat happen to me all de while. Nuff time supm tell mi nuh fe duh dis ar guh deh so.
Is not no 6th sense eedah. It is a spritual communication. Wish it cudda stay wid me more..,
TIGRR – lawks man, nuff times something delays me in traffic only to see a big accident up ahead…
My spiritual sense seems to involve people I love too. I will get a strong premonition that something is wrong. When I know who it is I immediately offer intercessary prayer. When I feel something is circling about, but do not know who is in danger, I just start praying for everyone who comes to mind.
EVANOVITCH – yes Tigrr, a dat u haffe duh yaa…..u know wha me jussa a memba….when me did likkle and de dumb tings we use to duh….one time enoh, me and mi fren a try get a drink...we were in primary school and figga seh we a go drink like big people...we tief di bokkle of alcohol and a hide a drink it...ongle problem was it was a bokkle of rubbing alcohol **kaka** we neva know seh alcohol is not alcohol ***talk bout dumb*** a lucky ting di fuss sip mek mi spit it out, cause lata awn in life mi get fi know seh drinking rubbing alcohol can be fatal...maybe dats why mi no like drink to dis day
777 – lawd Vanny… u know wha me use to do….me use to roll up any dry leaf and newspaper and light it and sey me a smoke cigarette... Maybe a dat mek me no never try smoking fe true..,
BOOPIE – lawd gad my list is endless….one time my grand mother had gone out for the evening so I was home with my other 3 cousins, anyway I wanted to polish my shoes and we had paste shoe polish. I wanted it to be liquid so it would be easy to apply to my shoes, so I had a bright idea to put the can on the gas stove to heat it. All of a sudden a big stream of fire shot through the can and the shoe polish was on fire! ***ohh lawd*** I was so scared I grabbed the can with my bare hands dropped the can on the linoleum floor….it was covered in brown spots of wax, one next time we nearly wash whey de house wid bubbles from de washing machine…den me black and white spots from Ambi, lawks me really have nuff a dem.., **DWL** one time me almost mek me modder have hawt failure true one bwoy a call him self a write me luv letter…iiee sah,
J-KID – well…me nearly electrocute me self…me nuh guh stick mi finga inna light socket (anybody tell u say me say me is all dere a lie dem a tell) **DWL**
MTNGAL – a suppose a craben me did craben, caaa me weena a try tek cokenat trash and sugga mek gizzada…sinting hat me belly esee..,
CHEF DONJUAN – me did always want walk round wid me pants down, dats all,
PORTMORE – I would stare at the sun till me eyes water every mawning, a musse star trek me did a look fah…
SUNIICA – well a suppose me did craven too, caa one day me tek a Vienna sausage can and put it pon de stove fe heat, de whole can explode every whey…, ***talk bout frighten**
MAHKKA – well I was wha dem call back yard scientist…one day I made my own parachute--out of a bed sheet--and jumped from the top of an ackee tree. I remember thinking, "But wait, mi suppose fi a drop suh faas" Next thing I remember is my granny feeding me some "sweet, sweet sugar and water". Haven't eaten ackee since. ( Mahkka – a de fuss me see dis, I was deding girl) **caca** den afta never nuh ackee fault, woiiieee,
777 - my father used to mek me cook rice and fe de life a me me juss cudden get it right...Him use to get real mad if it putta, putta. So sometimes it tek me all 3tries fe get it right…so u know say a nuff rice did bury outta back right, DWL
YARDY – me try fi fly affa de bathroom tap like batman, aan bruk mi han
SISTAGIRL – something wrang wid unu, unu guess wha… dis weekend me and Ochigal finally meet…..u know it amazes me how you can feel like you know someone and you have never met them…as soon as she walked in I knew it was her…and mek me tell u, she have one gorgeous son deh…kiss me neckbak…I really enjoyed our little meeting…
OCHIGAL – it was a pleasure!!!
Ms MENTION – oyyyy Its party time, JAMAICANDIAMOND its your birthday girl, and we gone pawty like its your birthday..,
KING DAHJAH – anyting u want JamD, anyting at all, juss name it babes, and its all yours..,
PORTMORE – ehhh me have a question….why did the chicken cross de road.
CHICKIE – ohh lawd not again ***rolleyes**
BRUK BAK - Give me ten minutes wid de chicken and mi will find out.
MS POWELL - De fact dat yuh thought dat de chicken crossed de road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity
SUESUMBA - it was ah government conspiracy
JACKIE - what the bloody hell!!!! FYAHHHHHHHHH Fi halll white meat!!!!!
WENDY - a ediat farrin fowl dat, If ah did one yaad fowl him woudda hap on pan di back ah one dumpa truck and hap aff when di truck reach di odda side.
PORTMORE – de whole a unu wrang…me nuh tink so, The chicken crossed the road not because he wanted to but because he knew that the land of opportunities was on the other side. The chicken was therfore forced to cross the road by the system. He crossed the road but he really didn't cross the road. He was kicked over on the other side by the PNP and JLP of the farm house.
****De end****
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