Di Pawty

[applepie]

Re: Di Pawty

so what happen to David? the person he had with him? who was that person? Bridgete and so on did the current Mr ILP know any of these people?

[CeaBee]

Re: Di Pawty



please continue

[ILP]

Re: Di Pawty

ummm...mi see you read di first post dem

[CeaBee]

Re: Di Pawty

alrite me edit the poas

[Compry]

Re: Di Pawty

You know all dis time, I thought ILP was just yuh Ja.com screen name. I tell yah, you learn something new everyday pan Ja.com.

Now come wid di ress.

[ILP]

Re: Di Pawty

So mi still busy deading ahn di current mr ilp ah look pon mi like ahn im ask mi what is so funny.

So mi ahn den ask, "What is David [umm...mi gwine call im DiHusband]'s wife's name?"
"David diHusband, the head of the company?"
"Yes"
"Bridgett? I think. Why?"
"Well if her name is Bridgett, then woooiieeee" Den mi bust out laughing again.
"What?"
"If it's Bridgett his wife's name is, then according to her 'David is acting like a [censored] and he is gonna get cursed out' tonight , as in at this party. That is if she hasn't done it already."
"Huh? Where'd you hear that?"
"In the bathroom."

Di current mr ilp look pan me with a Den wi continue mekin wi way ova to Jim ahn im daughter that di current mr ilp wanted to introduce mi to. Wi grab one next drink (memba fram di free bar... ) and one next hors d'ivers <----nuh baddah come tell mi seh daht spell wrong, mi already know Anyhow...

Di current mr ilp said, "So why is Bridgett going to curse him out tonight?"
"Because Bridgett likes a vibrator and he brought some woman here and she is upset about that."
"Huh? David came with his wife? Vibrator?"
"Look, I am telling you what I heard in the bathroom. That's all."

Just then wi reach to where Jim ahn im daughter was standing. Jim was dressed in one ah dem 70's 3 piece suit ahn im daughter dress just like she coming fram Woodstock Dem outfits wasn't missing a ting. Wi small chats, wi chat bout riding ahn di races ahn trails wi have done. Wi bops wi head to Guy's <span style="font-style: italic"> I Like</span> Oonu memba daht deh chune? Wi stawt chat bout di pawty when Jim says,

&quot;Hey di current mr ilp, what's up with David DiHusband and his wife?&quot; Mi start cough ahn mi look pon di current mr ilp Di current mr ilp ansa,
&quot;Umm, I dont know. Why?&quot;
Jim's continued, &quot;He ahn his wife have been going at it tonight.&quot; Den im start do dis ----&gt;
&quot;Mmm. I have no idea.&quot;
Jim's daughter adds, &quot;Yeah they are obviously fighting. There they are over there.&quot; Den she point.

Lawd when mi yeye dem find weh Jim daughter was pointing to ahn mi behold di site.

All mi can seh is it could neva be me fi real. Neva. Oonu hear wah mi seh

[Bandana]

Re: Di Pawty

ILP!!!!


nobody can tell one story like you ILP


now come finish it!

[UKBlackLady]

Re: Di Pawty

<span style="font-weight: bold">Hell Pee!</span> Come wid it nuh...

[ILP]

Re: Di Pawty

Like mi seh, certain people good cah dem put up wid tings weh mi could neva put up wid. Neva inna all my life mi could mek smaddy do mi suh ahn mi juss tan deh like some kinna foofool.

So mi yeye dem reach ova where Jim daughter pointing ahn mi see Bridgett ahn David DiHusband ova inna one corner inna one argument. Di musics (<span style="font-style: italic">Get into the Groove</span> by Madonna ) did turn up, so mi couldan mek out wah dem did a cuss off (obviously ) each oddah saying. But mi did see:

Bridgett vigorously inna David DiHusband face.
David DiHusband standing their like but im a look round fi mek sure nubaddy nu site im ova deh
Bridgett continues to vigorously inna David DiHusband face, but then she added this then she escalate to
David continues to scan di room, while and at Bridgett
Bridgett continues to and then she added Mi think something inna David DiHusband snap

David DiHusband then bax weh Bridgett hand outta fi im face.

Mi jaw drop did -------&gt; but mi continue sip glass of Riesling

Bridgett neva blink, enoh? She went from to to inna split second. Den she stawt fling some inna David DiHusband chest.

Now mi will admit daht mi have been that upset wid di current mr ilp daht mi have wanted to fling lick, but fi actually dweet ahn inna public no sah.

David DiHusband took few of di licks dem weh Bridgett was giving im, but is when Bridgett look like she wasnt gwine stop ahn David DiHusband stawt fi lose im balance ahn a fall back daht im had was fi tek some action. David DiHusband grab Bridgett hands and did look like im was trying fi put dem dung at har side, but Bridgett still ah bruk bad pon im so im literally (mi hand to gawd) pick har up (inna one bear hugs) and shoove har gense one wall.

Mi hear Jim seh, “Oh [censored]” Mi look ova at di current mr ilp ahn im was Few oddah smaddy daht was inna di vicinity look ova at di habaloo ahn dem look and Mi look back ova to where Bridgett ahn David DiHusband was ahn David DiHusband have Bridgett pin up gense di wall. Bridgett all of a sudden nu fling no lick again Mi couldan see wah David DiHusband was saying, but it look like im was telling Bridgett something (mussi some badwerd fi real, cah is suh mi woulda do ), di next ting you know Bridgett try fi gi David DiHusband ah hug . She ah try put har arms round im neck But David DiHusband not having any ah daht cah im backup fram gense Bridgett, she falls forward and den im grab har again ahn fling har around likkle bit den im stand har up. Den im commence fi tell har off properly. Mi neva hear di exact words, but see Bridgett face here all roll into one. David DiHusband mussi finish tell Bridgett di heap ah badwud, cah im stand up fix fi im outfit (im did have on one ah dem outfit weh mek im look like Hall &amp; Oats...oonu memba daht group, deh im neva do to bad wid ei) smile and den walk off towards di bar.

Mi haffi interject...daht deh smile gave mi a chill

Bridgett still ah stand deh looking and when one ooman walk up to har ahn mussi ask if she all right. Bridgett shake har head: No. Den she put har hands inna har face ahn stawt

Mi feel di current mr ilp grabbing on mi hand ahn mi hear im seh, “Umm...that wasn’t pretty.”
Mi hear Jim’s daughter say, “That wasn’t pretty at all. I wonder if she’s alright?”
Jim adds, “And you see why I am no longer married. Hell no, am I gonna let my wife do that to me and in public?”

Mi tun back round fi face Jim, im daughter, ahn di current mr ilp when mi glipse out di carnah of mi yeye dem, nobody but who ah slink ova to di bar ......

[CeaBee]

Re: Di Pawty



continue

[diabolical_Tanya]

Re: Di Pawty

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: coolbeans</div><div class="ubbcode-body">

continue </div></div>yes



and I must say and and mi noh si nuttin like dat dis upcoming party season dat starts today

[julie*mango]

Re: Di Pawty

somebody cawl mi wen she done dis yah tory

[ILP]

Re: Di Pawty

lawd how oonu can do mi suh?

how much times mi haffi tell oonu daht mi haffi tek time post cah if di current mr ilp eva know seh mi post fi im colleeks dem story pon intanet...lawd mi shame fah di outcome

[Bandana]

Re: Di Pawty

OMG!!!



Lawd ILP, you have me bustin a gut at my desk


I mean... oh that's terrible

[Compry]

Re: Di Pawty

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: mILuvPortland</div><div class="ubbcode-body">lawd how oonu can do mi suh?

how much times mi haffi tell oonu daht mi haffi tek time post cah if di current mr ilp eva know seh mi post fi im colleeks dem story pon intanet...lawd mi shame fah di outcome </div></div>

Kissteet...

a) don't ever let your SO find out that you post on Jamaicans.com
b) use wireless so you can post from the bathroom, balcony or the closet
c) if the above fails, type in MS Word then copy and paste quickly as soon as him leave di room

Yuh nuh have no excuse.