Can the African male...

[Emperah]

stick to one woman?

And why should we if it is not our nature (this is my stance)
It was when we were brought over here that they beat this out of us.
And it had nothing to do with womanizing but it was love and community and the sharing of All.

I believe they can, but I don't believe it is natural.
Tiger can't deny that pawt a him, him nuh even kno why him dweet

[Bizzy]

Re: Can the African male...

[Yvonne N.]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: dahJahPawtTwo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">stick to one woman?

</div></div>


Commitment to building a family unit could make it happen.
<span style="font-size: 8pt">Catching coochi on di side is a learned behaviour; it nuh necessary.</span>

[Suesumba]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BiziBubbla</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> </div></div>

[halfwaytree]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: dahJahPawtTwo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">stick to one woman?

And why should we if it is not our nature (this is my stance)
It was when we were brought over here that they beat this out of us.
And it had nothing to do with womanizing but it was love and community and the sharing of All.

I believe they can, but I don't believe it is natural.
Tiger can't deny that pawt a him, him nuh even kno why him dweet </div></div>


Honestly, I think it is programed into all males, not just Africans to mate with many females. At the heart of the matter is the fact that we humans are really nothing more than animals and as many other species in the animal kingdom, the males have the urge to mate with different females. Speak honestly with the most faithful of men and I can guarantee that 99% have at least fantasized about what it would be like to sleep with a woman other than their wife.

[ILP]

Re: Can the African male...

IMO a person should roosk as many people as they feel the need, as long as they do so safely and openly. If they are gonna get married and promise to be faithful to one other person...then to me that is the issue. Get married, but give the other person the option of deciding to be married to you if sleeping with other people is what you want to do.

You'd be suprised at the number of people that I know who are happily married and both partners have many partners outside of their married...but the caviat is that they are open with their spouses about it...and voila...NO DECEPTION.

[jah_yout]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ILP_N_Belly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">IMO a person should roosk as many people as they feel the need, as long as they do so safely and openly. If they are gonna get married and promise to be faithful to one other person...then to me that is the issue. Get married, but give the other person the option of deciding to be married to you if sleeping with other people is what you want to do.

You'd be suprised at the number of people that I know who are happily married and both partners have many partners outside of their married...but the caviat is that they are open with their spouses about it...and voila...NO DECEPTION. </div></div>

this is true

[jah_yout]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: dahJahPawtTwo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">stick to one woman?

And why should we if it is not our nature (this is my stance)
It was when we were brought over here that they beat this out of us.
And it had nothing to do with womanizing but it was love and community and the sharing of All.

I believe they can, but I don't believe it is natural.
Tiger can't deny that pawt a him, him nuh even kno why him dweet </div></div>

africa not a monolith...
different marriage customs co-existed;
it is a choice whether one wants to have one woman or more or no woman...i feel outlawing polygamy is primitive western philosophy; it should be a legal choice if all parties consent...talk about the gov't running people's personal lives...
obviously the high level of divorce/scandals proves that their philosophy is a lie, yet they want to outlaw an inherent human right...very strange

[julie*mango]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ILP_N_Belly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">IMO a person should roosk as many people as they feel the need, as long as they do so safely and openly. If they are gonna get married and promise to be faithful to one other person...then to me that is the issue. Get married, but give the other person the option of deciding to be married to you if sleeping with other people is what you want to do.

You'd be suprised at the number of people that I know who are happily married and both partners have many partners outside of their married...but the caviat is that they are open with their spouses about it...and voila...NO DECEPTION. </div></div>

mi agree...my biggest thing is honesty..why tell me u gonna love me and only me wen yu a dip yu pen inna every inkwell out deh...

but saying that you can't stay faithful because you are black is like saying you have a big pengeleng because you black..

[jah_yout]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Curmudgeon_Milo</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: dahJahPawtTwo</div><div class="ubbcode-body">stick to one woman?

And why should we if it is not our nature (this is my stance)
It was when we were brought over here that they beat this out of us.
And it had nothing to do with womanizing but it was love and community and the sharing of All.

I believe they can, but I don't believe it is natural.
Tiger can't deny that pawt a him, him nuh even kno why him dweet </div></div>


Honestly, I think it is programed into all males, not just Africans to mate with many females. At the heart of the matter is the fact that we humans are really nothing more than animals and as many other species in the animal kingdom, the males have the urge to mate with different females. Speak honestly with the most faithful of men and I can guarantee that 99% have at least fantasized about what it would be like to sleep with a woman other than their wife. </div></div>

and the other 1% are fantasizing about other men

[Bizzy]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ILP_N_Belly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">IMO a person should roosk as many people as they feel the need, as long as they do so safely and openly. If they are gonna get married and promise to be faithful to one other person...then to me that is the issue. Get married, but give the other person the option of deciding to be married to you if sleeping with other people is what you want to do.
</div></div>

[Fyah]

Re: Can the African male...

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: ILP_N_Belly</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
You'd be suprised at the number of people that I know who are happily married and <span style="font-weight: bold">both partners have many partners outside of their married...but the caviat is that they are open with their spouses about it...and voila...NO DECEPTION.</span> </div></div>

Very interesting take.

This has now made me wonder about the reasons for the hullaballoo when a man or woman has relations with someone &quot;outside&quot;.

- Does the hurt mainly come from feeling deceived?

- Is the whole idea just about being open and honest? f a person is open about &quot;outside&quot; relations does that then make it more acceptable?

- Is it possible for someone who say that they truly love their partner have relations with someone else without there being any impact on their relationship?

I am a bit confused but trying to learn about the &quot;IN&quot; principles, since I am (according to my daughter) Ole Skool.

[ILP]

Re: Can the African male...

SP...I am no kind of expert, but from what I've seen the couples approach the &quot;open&quot; thingy all kinds of ways, they negotiate according to the needs that they have as a couple. They do what works for the two of them.

I am close to one couple that negotiate on who will go outside and for how long. Sometimes it is a 1 time thing and sometimes it is for periods of a month(s). It really just depends. This particular couple even has children.

At first I was like then after gettting to know them, I cant say that they truly dont love each other. They do and they love their family. They just have (have had) many partners over the course of their marriage.

[Emperah]

Re: Can the African male...

who said anyting bout deception or cheating or stepping out.
I'm talking about the way it used to be. De ooman done kno what a gwaan, no lie naah tell. And fi de bible believers yuh done kno seh it did gwaan een deh tuh, suh why hold on to de farrin mind so strong?

And I said male too.
Woman nuh fi pass roun dem sittin like is biscuit a one horderv pawty

Unno eva wundah why ooman outnumbah man by 7-1 if not more?

[Nylah]

Re: Can the African male...

what do you mean the way it used to be?

JY made a good point that Africa is a continent and not a country, so mating rituals are nothing close to uniform across the board in Afirca. So which old tradition are you referring to?