When your "adult" child brings their SO home

[nattydreadgirl]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

RC,

Question, was the mother upset for the way the gyal look upon her or that son had overnight guest or both?

Ohhh just went back and read the 2nd part of your post. He is facety and needs his own place if he was my son.

[ILP]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

mi here you RC, but there comes a time when i cyan business wid how it fi work out fi a grown pikney. mi juss haffi mek up in my mind that dem haffi go out deh (juss like me) and dem hafi sink or swim (juss like me). mi love dem dearly, but dem gonna haffi do fi themself.

when that time is for each person is different, but for me it would certainly be time for this boy fi hit di road. cah mi naw gwine buss mi back fi smaddy (chile or not) fi hear dem come tell me bout wah mi a do and wid whom ahn especially inna my place weh mi pay fah.

when dem stawt pay dem own way...den wi can chat. until den...well...

[JAmerican Ooman]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

Wow Wow Wow..

I have a 19yo in my house right now. Been telling me for the last year that he wants to go to School.. still waiting for him to register somewhere..

He knows I will not put him out.. My philosophy is first and foremost, I will take care of you exclusively until you are 18.. I will send you to the school of your choice until you are 21.. if its more than a 4 year degree, then I will help you out until you are 25.

I feel that at 25, I have prepared you to be a contributing memmber of society and its time for you to get your own..

But my house is my house.. if you do what you are supposed to do, you should not be here in the first place at 19yo.

This Man-Child knows from wayyyyyyy back that this cannot happen, oh but he did forget, because he was now 18, that should have changed this relationship..I quickly reminded him and his girl of choice, even though they were sleeping with their clothes on and accidently fell asleep..

No way is a child going to tell me who, when, and how someone stays in my place and they are not dropping a red cent..

I pay for room/board and food.. anything else he is on his own.. I am not here for entertainment purposes... so it goh

OH.. and he knows he cannot cross my threshold after midnight on weeknights and 1:00am on weekends.. later than that.. sleep where you were..

But the rank gyal.. like someone else said.. she "neva wooda made it" back to the room..

[Bizzy]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

Das right! Be a parent, not a friend.

Bout the madda a bring in man fi sleep over to
@ 19, him is a still a child and wuss like how it nuh seem him a do anyting fi help himself or the mom

den again, RC neva mention if de kid have anyting a do or jus siddung a de yaad wid him han open

[R_C]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: JAmerican Ooman</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... even though they were sleeping with their clothes on and accidently fell asleep..</div></div>

[R_C]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BiziBubbla</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Das right! den again, RC neva mention if de kid have anyting a do or jus siddung a de yaad wid him han open </div></div>

Lots of plans, no movement.

[twiney]

Re: Do as I say, not as I do.

Mother fault ... at 19 you have to do something ... you either going to school or working or learning a trade ... in fact if you not in school you have a 1 year grace period from you finish high school and after the first 6 months if you sleep in mi house you cyaan eat there and if you working you paying me rent and is still my house so my rules still apply... if you want your rules go pay rent outa road so u can you have your rules

[Peasie]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

Even if they are paying for room and board in my house, they need to understand &quot;My house, my rules.&quot;

That being said, we do allow overnight guests. With the exception of one incident, I know who these are ahead of time. Girlfriend from college came to visit for July 4 long weekend - we live near DC so it's an attraction. Then there are friends who are girls, meaning old friends and they just hang out. Either way, it is my house. I will put out fresh an outta awdah pickney - be it my own or smaddy else

My children know that from long time - I will put up with a lot but mi caan tek rudeniss Mi nevah fraid fi call up parents an tell dem fi come get dem bad-behavin pickney from mi yaad.

So mi tink Rollin, dat yuh fren need fi get up in dat pickney face and tell him who control her house! He is also out of order to equate your friend's sleep over guests, boyfriend or no, with his own. Her child is not her equal! or as my mother used to say to me, &quot;Me an yuh ah noh combolo!&quot;

[Wendy]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

Oh Lowd .. RC a tink yuh need fi gi dis lady Peasie numba..shi ready fi tek ann di bway Mi tink shi can set im straight in about say......10 secands LOL

Yes Peasie mi agree..all when im a pay rent rules affi set AND even before he or she get to that ripe age of 18 and up ..dem fi undastan di rules. When dem a grow up ina dem purperty stage dem shoulda have a clear understanding how tings ago run when dem reach di &quot;fly outta di roost&quot; stage

Dat dem wi larn fi dem pickney as dem a grow to

[Stormmey]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

I think there is no respect between Mom and son, that was lost a long time ago. I think this bwoy was disrespecting his Mom ages ago in different ways and it was not addressed.

If my maternal granmere was alive and I dared at the ripe old age of 27 to bring a male in her house to sleep over in the same room with me, I would have gotten a beat dung and that young man would be running for his life.

I have slept over my granpere and stepgranmere's house and I was told straight up you know you are both occuping separate rooms eh young lady and young man

[ILP]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Peasie</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> &quot;Me an yuh ah noh combolo!&quot; </div></div>



wonda if my muddah know gungo muddah? cah combolo ah ring inna fi mi ears all now.

[Seveen]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

the economy is not an excuse to live at home

my first job i made $100 a week before taxes

it took me 2 of those checks to pay the rent a month (studio apartment)

one of those checks for food and utilities (no phone and i unplugged the 'frig)

the other check eventually bought me a car

all of this - quickly motivated me to higher education = more money

[diabolical_Tanya]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

My parents raised me to understand the even now at this age if mi carry man come a dem house and wi not MARRIED we will be sleeping in separate rooms

[Stormmey]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Seveen</div><div class="ubbcode-body">the economy is not an excuse to live at home

my first job i made $100 a week before taxes

it took me 2 of those checks to pay the rent a month (studio apartment)

one of those checks for food and utilities (no phone and i unplugged the 'frig)

the other check eventually bought me a car

all of this - quickly motivated me to higher education = more money



</div></div>

Seveen, how long ago was this

[H_O]

Re: When your &quot;adult&quot; child brings their SO home

all i can say is todays generation is messed up.
there like bottom feeders. they want things too easy and live off the avails of there parents hard work and make up lame excuses.there priorities are backwards. they always seem to have money for there iphones