3 month itch

[CyberPhobic]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Quodlibet</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: CyberPhobic</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... Eida yuh want di smaddy 100% or nat. Problem solved.
</div></div>

Disagree, 100% no jus come so, afta a no scratch an win!

sometimes it haffi build up, dis month a 30%, nex month a 32%, an so on... </div></div>

How bout kratch an sniff?

Ennyway, wen mi reflekk bakk a only smaddy whe a come widd baggage deppan a tekk dem time anna buildup like dem kno what tomoro bring an demma buil howse.

If di smaddy an di edda smaddy click hawd an demma get busy pon di regula, a hundrid percenta dat, an nuh time stamp nuh deppan dat. Hundrid percent a wen yuh give yuh all cauz yuh care deeply an nuh biznizz bout nutt'n else. Everyting else a gravy pon tap. Anna dat dey time yuh get fi wurk pandi hundrid an one, hundrid an two an such delike.

Mi nuh undastan how peeple whe feel LOVE, deeeeeeep love before hooda waah compute an ration out. It comeeen like smaddy whe fake di big O. IMHO, a wayse a time tings dem dey fi pickney whe nuh kno nuh betta.

[quodlibet]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: CyberPhobic</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
...
How bout kratch an sniff?
...
</div></div>

Dat gwaan from the first chance mi get...

[Wendy]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Quodlibet</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: CyberPhobic</div><div class="ubbcode-body">... Eida yuh want di smaddy 100% or nat. Problem solved.
</div></div>

Disagree, 100% no jus come so, afta a no scratch an win!

sometimes it haffi build up, dis month a 30%, nex month a 32%, an so on... </div></div>

BOADWL Mi sey yuh have way fi describe tings wey noh stap yahsoh

To me both a unu right ..in some case people have to &quot;grow&quot; on you.. and in other cases it feels right fram day wan an onwards

[R_C]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: sistacaf</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> ....i'm the one who just wanna enjoy things and see how it develops and NOT push it.... i more want to just go along and see how things develop naturally over time, without pushing it. cause i don't really care if we spend the rest of life together, i'm perfectly fine on my own. For me a long term committed r'ship is a choice, not a 'need' - IF i'm with someone it can work with. i more care how we get along when we ARE together, and if it winds up goin there, well we can deal with that as it comes.... </div></div>

I am loving this. SC, you get where I am coming from. Couldn't have said it better myself.

[sistacaf]

Re: 3 month itch

yah calf i hear u loud an clear... but ... the trick is somehow managing to get together with a similar-thinking somebody. which seems to never flickin happen. and by the time u know that, it's too late cause u all in it areddy.

so like u said, here you are goin along nice, then u find out after a too-short time that the 'nice and cool' somebody on the other side is a kinda one who <span style="font-style: italic">needs</span> a committment and needs to know yes or no from u NOW.... well then houston we have a prablem.

so, if u wanna continue with them cause you really likin them, u can give in and gi dem the 'serious talk' they looking for, share how u really feel, and see how it goes. Or not, if u don't wanna.

but then u might haffi just walk. Cause trust, they are not gonna stop askin, nor stop wanting the promise, and the weight of their constant expectation might make you feel a way, they get resentful that u 'holdin out', and the whole thing can just spoil from all that. but u never know - they might just surprise u and be cool and agree to be easy widdit. which u would never know unless you do have 'the talk'. so i dunno, it's a hard call.

but when it comes down to it, that's pretty much the only choices you got at this point. kinda sucks but woop, there it is.

[dearjohn]

Re: 3 month itch

Three months is a short period of time. After about three months, why would a woman put some men in a position to feel that they have to lie about their feelings?

[Tulip]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Rollin_Calf</div><div class="ubbcode-body">...Cause personally, I find these arguments always seem to come from left field. For instance, di two a wi siddung a watch a movie afta a nice dinner weh wi cook together, wi deh hug up, hug up panni couch, yuh feel seh everyting criss an curry and then:

<span style="font-size: 14pt"><span style="font-weight: bold">&quot;RC, there is something I need to talk to you about&quot;
The first thing I say to myself is: &quot;Lawd Jeezas a wah dis now&quot;.
</span>
</span>

Choh man, why oonu cyaan enjoy a good ting man widdout di nyeng nyeng ? </div></div>


The bold part nearly made me spit my tea on the screen. There is no worse conversation opener than &quot;we need to talk&quot; be it from work, church, the playground, mama, daddy, or your own backyard. The person is now on red alert and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

[Tulip]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Wendilina</div><div class="ubbcode-body">RC - from my experience and please don't be upset with me ... If a guy has long term or true interest he will not hesitate to divuldge his feelings. It's really a honest assesment of how you feel that she seeks.

When they start hum-haaing over the issue it raises my eyebrows Like someone says ..it's not a ring she is asking for.. but how do you <span style="text-decoration: underline">feel</span> ..And I thik if you were expressive in that way she would not have to asked. Have you expressed that to her by the way? And yes I know some men say they &quot;express&quot; their feelings in diff ways but a woman needs to <span style="font-weight: bold">hear</span> it as well. Dats just how we are </div></div>

I totally agree with this post.

Also though, I think it is fair for folks to want to know how you stand in general about being in a relationship at all and many other issues. Maybe you have no desire to be in a relationship at all and that's cool so b up your chest and say so. Some honest communication would cut down on a lot of confusion and the mother of all eff ups known as assumption.

I don't think three months is too soon to decide whether you consider the person relationship material. I think if most people are honest, they know way before then. And I want to add that I see nothing wrong with having a playmate; it's fun. I don't see anything dangerous or argumentative about knowing where you stand.

[Tulip]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: sistacaf</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> <div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> Why do some women do this ? I mean if everything is going well, why oonu always haffi open up this thing and start all this interrogation and analysis ?</div></div>

cause what their goal is, is a long-term serious relationship, including committment and/or maybe marriage. Ppl like this think in terms of their whole life, not just 'right now'. so at some point, yes usually months, they feel that all cards gotta be on the table so both ppl can discover what each other's 'life goals' are.

Ppl who don't have that particular outcome as their goal, more interested in just enjoying 'now', don't wanna be bothered with analyzing/thinking bout the future.

there's not a thing wrong with either way. is just that a relationship between them two kinda ppl can't work - one lookin one thing in life, and the other wants something totally different.

The one who's thinking/planning for future, needs to know if the other one shares their goals, and if its worth keeping on wit them or not. they feel there's no point in gettin deeper into something if the other has no interest in committment, and they <span style="font-style: italic">do</span>. Cause there's no future in that for them. So they ask.

and true, some folks just don't want a big serious thing... relationship and committment and blah blah and rayray. There ain't nothin wrong with that either.

but if that's the case, it's only fair to answer her honestly, and say so.
So if she DOES want that, she can go her way and find it. </div></div>

I totally agree with this post too.

Also it seems not too many people agree with me but unless you are in a committed relationship, there is no reason in the world to date just one person.

[MarieK]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">unless you are in a committed relationship, there is no reason in the world to date just one person</div></div>

say what now

<span style="font-style: italic"><span style="font-weight: bold">uncommitting myself as we speak</span></span>

<span style="font-style: italic">Mr. Q of D A, come here likkle Tulip seh dat as long as mi committed tuh yuh mi cyaan see nobody suh hear mi nuh baws dis ting yah? it done. walk good </span>

[MarieK]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">&quot;RC, there is something I need to talk to you about&quot;
The first thing I say to myself is: &quot;Lawd Jeezas a wah dis now&quot;. </div></div>

ok why is it that ALL men do this. I mean if mi guh talk to mi boss a di sed look him get, if mi guh chat tuh mi uncle a di same ting, baxcova if mi walk guh inna di bank and approach di manager an seh I need to speak with you, him gi mi di same look and it universal ennuh it nuh matter if yuh chat patois and di man speak hebrew you say &quot;we gotta talk&quot; and instantly him run. what the hell

[Tulip]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Queen_of_d_A</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">unless you are in a committed relationship, there is no reason in the world to date just one person</div></div>

say what now

<span style="font-style: italic"><span style="font-weight: bold">uncommitting myself as we speak</span></span>

<span style="font-style: italic">Mr. Q of D A, come here likkle Tulip seh dat as long as mi committed tuh yuh mi cyaan see nobody suh hear mi nuh baws dis ting yah? it done. walk good </span>

</div></div>


LOL @ walk good. Poor Mr. Q of D A.

I am saying that the point of being committed is you both saying you going to just see each other. If you can't manage to open your mouth and chat enough to discuss whether you are committed then you are not committed. Why not date others?

[sistacaf]

Re: 3 month itch

yep Tulip i totally agree with u on this.

unless de two people make a decision <span style="font-style: italic">together</span> that them are in a committed/exclusive relation, then it has not been brought into existance. u don't juss 'fall' into a committment, it has to be actively created by both parties fi it to exist. both haffi want it and agree that's where they goin with the relation. if that's not done, then no comittment is present.

and not everyone <span style="font-style: italic">wants</span> to 'go there', which is a perfectly valid choice too.

[kia027]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DearJohn</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Three months is a short period of time. After about three months, why would a woman put some men in a position to feel that they have to lie about their feelings? </div></div>

cause one orthodox rabbi did seh if after 8 dates you doan feel u compatible mi sekkle down u fi move on

[MarieK]

Re: 3 month itch

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: DearJohn</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Three months is a short period of time. After about three months, why would a woman put some men in a position to feel that they have to lie about their feelings? </div></div>

I too think three months is wayyy too short of a time for you to know if this is the person you want to spend your life with. Hell sometimes years untop of years is too short of a time. I think adults are either to naiive or too desperate.