Family Issue

[Gen]

Re: Family Issue

how much "you" are willing to pay ?

why it got to be "your" responsibility/problem ?

Is the payment going to be split between you and your siblings ?


bway mi know yuh madda grateful to him for taking care of her when she was younger but \0/ [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Family Issue

My sister is currently in school in Florida - so my mom won't ask her to 'help' [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/whatever.gif[/img]

My older brother lives in Florida and they definately won't ask him to help [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70400-talktohand.gif[/img]

And I'm the only other one who's living abroad [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/whatever.gif[/img] and have a husband...

My mother, even though she's lived here and she knoa say it nuh easy, has apparently forgotten... and now seem to think I need only go outside and pick some money offa tree... \0/

I don't want to pay anything Gen. His children works and his wife works. His daughter have nutn else fi waste har money pon adda dan buy de lastest dis an gaa club...

When I say stuff like this my mom says I'm beating a dead horse... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/whatever.gif[/img]

My mother will end up paying his rent, I'm thinking, and I will feel forced to send her more to cover the shortfall... so whatever way it's cut, David and I will end up paying... \0/

[Boopie2]

Re: Family Issue

[quote=Geneva]how much "you" are willing to pay ?

why it got to be "your" responsibility/problem ?

Is the payment going to be split between you and your siblings ?


bway mi know yuh madda grateful to him for taking care of her when she was younger but \0/ [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/frown.gif[/img]


They think the streets are lined with gold, when you're far away I guess. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img] What a headache. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70456-eyebrows.gif[/img] Does your mother also think that your son may want to go to college when he graduates from high school?

[kia027]

Re: Family Issue

Nunya
Do you speak to your uncle and his family directly? You may get a different perspective from them if you do

[Nunya]

Re: Family Issue

No.

My mother thinks that it would be 'unmannerable' for me to talk to him about it directly. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/whatever.gif[/img]

Is big people ting \0/ Plus im nuh waa fi feel like im affi depen pan handouts cause alla wi proud... <-- my mother's reasoning \0/

[Shine_Eye_Girl]

Re: Family Issue

WOW Nunya....this is really a hard position to be in.

I would build the house for your uncle and make sure every inch of that house is left in your name. If the son can be so teef to his own dad, then doing it to you is a breeze.

Just for you Uncle's peace..I would do it.

Nunya...... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img]


Remember, the good Lord gives back in tenfold...... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Family Issue

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Di_Real_Wife</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Remember, the good Lord gives back in tenfold...... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] </div></div>

Das wha she keep saying [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img]

Mi nah buil no house doah [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img]

[seemiyah]

Re: Family Issue

I haven't read through all the suggestions but if he can go back home to your mother can you pay for a helper/caretaker for him so that your mother would not be doing the work herself? That cheaper than building a house. Is your father opposed to him being there? I don't remember if you said that or not.

[Nunya]

Re: Family Issue

My Dad don't talk much. When my uncle used to come for his two-week visit, my Dad would leave out early in the morning and come back very very late at night.

I guess that was him putting up with my uncle for two weeks. I don't think he'd do that everyday... and he would figure that my mom should know how he feels without him having to say so...

[Boopie2]

Re: Family Issue

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nunya</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Di_Real_Wife</div><div class="ubbcode-body">
Remember, the good Lord gives back in tenfold...... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70459-hugs.gif[/img] </div></div>

Das wha she keep saying [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70394-bawlout.gif[/img]

Mi nah buil no house doah [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img] </div></div>

Yes but she also has to care for her family first. If you're not in the position to do it don't put yourself into trouble. Along with all the house bills next you'll be hearing about the ever loving taxes. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70400-talktohand.gif[/img]

[Nunya]

Re: Family Issue

She likes telling me how far the Canadian dollar can stretch in Jamaica - that's her way of saying it won't cost me much...

[kia027]

Re: Family Issue

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Nunya</div><div class="ubbcode-body">She likes telling me how far the Canadian dollar can stretch in Jamaica - that's her way of saying it won't cost me much... </div></div>

but dat is only if the canadian dollar can meet your needs in Canada.

It is tough but you have to just put your foot down with your mom and suggest that he can rent a place near her, as long as his family (wife & children) come together and foot the bill.. After all, if his wife is in the church dat would be the Xian thing to do

((((Nunya))))

[Nylah]

Re: Family Issue

Nunya, I agree with seemiyah - help with helper costs for your uncle at your mom's house but I dont think its good to go so far out on a limb and build house, etc when you and David arent quite ready.

If his health isnt so good, how can he live on his own if you do build the house? And how long will the house take to be built? God forbid, but what if he passes away before its even done? You can still use the house cause its yours but you dont want to over-extend yourself before you are ready.

I saw my daddy do this kind of move for family members and no matter how well intentioned, it just never turns out well.

[Boopie2]

Re: Family Issue

Well tell her you can hardly makes ends meet as it is, you can't afford it you don't want to hear another peep about it. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70456-eyebrows.gif[/img] I may consider helping if my brother would also help as well, it's just not fair dumping all this crap on you. You are going to have to be firm with her, not saying you have to be disrespectful but it's no time to be mushy mouthed. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img]

[Boopie2]

Re: Family Issue

Guess we all are thinking on the same thing, you can help if you choose to but don't over do it! One of my aunts wanted to build a house on the property that I was raised on. The youngest aunt lives there in the family house. Well her intentions was to knock the house down and build on it having my aunt move in with her. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img] But since the other brothers and sisters are paying the taxes she just couldn't do anything she wanted without everybody coming to an agreement.

No one agreed with it so that was that. Now if it were some other family then maybe it wouldn't have been any problems but Lord, you can see people's motives clearly when there track record is blemished way beyond the norm. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img]