In love with a married man

[Peasie]

After all these years, I have been meaning to answer Luther Ingram ...

[Peasie]

To Luther (even doah im dead now) Yes. You are wrong. Very wrong. And she is wrong too.

And now mi have mi fren a bawling pan di phone bout "how shi feel bad an waan mek tings right"

Mi tell har to just forget about it and seek therapy

What would you tell her?

[RichD]

What she trying to fix?

[Peasie]

Her own marriage is falling apart. IMO it has nothing to do with this fling she had with a married man *before* she got married but while she was dating the man who is now her husband. Still with me? Good ... because I am confused.

She seems to be in emotional disarray. Lawd And she called me out of the blue. Why oh why did I answer the phone?

[RichD]

I think i follow you. so she think confession will heal all?

[Peasie]

I believe that is the direction she was heading. Bad idea. I told her that. That's the best I can offer her - oh and that she should take time for herself and consider some therapy. I don't like these dramatics *shudder*

What would you sugesst?

[RichD]

I believe that is the direction she was heading. Bad idea. I told her that. That's the best I can offer her - oh and that she should take time for herself and consider some therapy. I don't like these dramatics *shudder*

What would you sugesst?

i agree its a bad idea. I also agree it look like she need some counselling on how to deal with her issues of guilt or whatever. but it nuh mek no sense try carry down odda ppl because she feel bad. she need to decide what she want. I dont know if im a big believer in "we can work through this thing" .

what she afraid of? being alone?

[Suesumba]

does her husband know about her fling?

[RichD]

does her husband know about her fling?

ascording to how i follow the story ..the issue is that she want to confess to the husband..so him nuh know yet

[Suesumba]

she's a drama queen - what he doesn't know won't hurt him. she should just make it up to him by behaving decently towards him.

[j-kid]

Soh what shi tink. After shi tell him, dem ah goh mek wild passionate love, an goh on from there?

[DearK]

Im thinking she feels distance b/w her and hubby and is attributing it to her fling, or wondering if he might be having one himself...

[Peasie]

does her husband know about her fling?

ascording to how i follow the story ..the issue is that she want to confess to the husband..so him nuh know yet

Awrite, unno confused as me. Mek mi spell out this sorry likkle tale:

• Kevin and Anita are married almost 20 years now. They have two teens.
• Carla and Gary are married about 7 years. They have a 4-year old.
• While Carla was dating Gary she and Kevin had a hot, hot affair and they both "fell in love" with each other
• Carla was ready to dump Gary but Kevin not leaving Anita and their two young children JUST LIKE IN THE SONG
• Kevin is a dog and Carla is a fool. Whatever.
• Carla then marries Gary. They appear happily married and prominent in a large evangelical church.
• Carla is unhappy. I think she has an undiagnosed mental health issue. I think Gary thinks she may need some intervention.
• Tings not right with the marriage.
• Carla feels is the "guilt the Lord is laying on her heart."
• She feels "led by the Lord to tell Gary about her sins with Kevin."

Peasie tells Carla:

1. It's a bad idea to tell Gary.
2. Why don't you see a doctor first.

[Bernidre]

To Luther (even doah im dead now) Yes. You are wrong. Very wrong. And she is wrong too.

And now mi have mi fren a bawling pan di phone bout "how shi feel bad an waan mek tings right"

Mi tell har to just forget about it and seek therapy

What would you tell her?

Well don't you think the best therapy is the truth? I certainly think so. The best thing would be to have a confession in the presence of a counselor. If the marriage is built on lies and deceit (which it obviously is) the someone needs to come clean as it is completely unfair and cruel to have someone believe you love them and have been faithful when clearly it is not the case. As a christian married man, I would rather feel the hurt of a confession from my wife than to have her hide it for years only to find out way later...cause the truth always comes out some way some how.

[RichD]

Awrite, unno confused as me. Mek mi spell out this sorry likkle tale:

• Kevin and Anita are married almost 20 years now. They have two teens.
• Carla and Gary are married about 7 years. They have a 4-year old.
• While Carla was dating Gary she and Kevin had a hot, hot affair and they both "fell in love" with each other
• Carla was ready to dump Gary but Kevin not leaving Anita and their two young children JUST LIKE IN THE SONG
• Kevin is a dog and Carla is a fool. Whatever.
• Carla then marries Gary. They appear happily married and prominent in a large evangelical church.
• Carla is unhappy. I think she has an undiagnosed mental health issue. I think Gary thinks she may need some intervention.
• Tings not right with the marriage.
• Carla feels is the "guilt the Lord is laying on her heart."
• She feels "led by the Lord to tell Gary about her sins with Kevin."

Peasie tells Carla:

1. It's a bad idea to tell Gary.
2. Why don't you see a doctor first.

nuh dat mi did sey?

it hink if she tell gary it not only going to mash up her business it a go mash up kevin business too