Serenity's Prayer (For Bandanna)

[Love©®]

Serenity's Prayer (For Bandanna)

<font color="purple">Part IX Serenity’s Grace </font>

Senses awakened by the smell of rich mountain coffee, Seren's arms rose above her head in submission to the morning. The house was strangely quiet, she hoped she wasn't the first one up. Being on vacation meant you were suppose to sleep late right? Obviously someone was up, who was making the coffee?

The food delicious as always, the night led to drinking and conversation. Tahir and Lionel left, leaving the girls their catch up time. The last thing she remembered was getting to good and couldn't recall saying the word night. Daylight now beckoned her to start the day. Slipping on a pair of short white bootie socks, Seren never wore slippers. Dressers and small woven baskets held dozens upon dozens of socks. She grabbed her robe and made her way down stairs to the kitchen but not before noticing the beautiful motif of the room. Lacy's outdone herself, Seren looked around. The room was dedicated to the Cherokee and Blackfoot Indians. Rust red and mustard yellow colors covered the walls in southwestern patterns. Authentic artifacts were shelved above the length of the room, track lighting gave them their own sense of respect. Oil paintings of wolves and bears by local artist hung on either wall. Seren's tummy, being called by the reintroduction to the smell of brewing coffee, snapped her out of the overpowering feeling of being pulled in to their past... a time of peace, of being one with the natural order of things.

Descending the stairs, she still wondered why there wasn't any activity or voices. Treasure was usually the first up anywhere. Lord knows that child is a morning flower. She now heard utensils against pans, and motion in the kitchen, her pace picked up. She couldn't wait to see Lace, longing to see what delicious treat awaited her breakfast pallet. Oh hello, good morning. Oh I'm sorry, I thought you were Lacy, no I apologize I can only be me, Tahir stated, his stare intense. Just kidding, Tahir quickly offered, noticing her shift one leg to the other. Lace and Lionel went into town to take care of business at the shop. Yeah, I completely forgot, they opened a small market right? Yup, they decided to let you sleep in. In? What time is it? 11 am. Oh My God!! Treasure? She's with them, no worries. Would you like something to eat? I've made enough for two, he turned his attention back to the task at hand. Oh, umm, no, no thanks. Ya sure? I said no thank you! Okay, if you change your mind, I'll leave some in a container. By the time Tahir turned back around for her acknowledgement, Seren had already taken off for the stairs.

After her shower, nothing felt better than to air dry naked upon her bed. She opened the shutters and let the sun in. You tell me this sun can't cure what ails ya. Satisfied with her half hour meditation, she fished out her pink track short suit that showed of the thickness of her thighs. The stigma of being so light had stuck with her since childhood. You're not really black the kids would tease, look how light your are. Your eyes look like a cat, ah ha ah ha. Her mother always told her it was jealousy and those kids didn't love themselves. Parent's never understand that logic meant nothing to some adults let alone kids. When she got to Jamaica she showed as much skin as she could without being trashy to get just as dark as she could.

Once again decending the stairs, hoping that He still wasn't around, she entered the kitchen for a much needed drink. There was a covered plate with a note. Have a wonderful day, I saved you some just in case. Blessings, Tahir.

She rolled her eyes and went into the fridge. See,this is how it starts. You eat what they make, two days later they're professing their undying love. She grabbed a cold Ting, her favorite, a mango and decided to take a walk.

Seren hadn't traveled many places, but of the places she had the privilege of experiencing, nothing even compared to the beauty of Jamaica. When she thought of Heaven, she always pictured it just like this. She and Gandhi floating, talking on a cloud, contemplating the possibilities of the universe.

On her way to absolutely no where, she and Jill Scott sung aloud. Jill thorugh her iPod, she to the sky:

You pulled some tricks out yo sleeve last night
everything I fantasize about-ah you had me climbing up a wall, how many ways was GOD called?

You represented_in_the_fashion_of_the_tru-ly gifted.

You oo-oo, put it down last night. Knocked me and had me dream about waking up alright.

Do you want some money baby? How about some chicken wings?

Do you want some fish and grits? I’ll hurry and go get it!

Whateva, whateva, whateva, whateva, whateva, whateva, Whateva baby.

Wee made a groove last night. A poignant rockin forth and back..alright.

anything I can do for you, just ask sometimes you wont have to.

I’ll be happy just to make you happy and that’s true.

This is not helping!!! Seren internally laughed. After being celibate so long, its hard to hear songs like that. A knew kind of emptiness hits you. Like anything, you can condition yourself to get used to any situation. The universe will remind you every now and again that alone is not where you're suppose to be...

Head back, lungs inflated and heart beating she belted the words of the song, wishing them into existence. Seren, pased an old couple, strolling slowly, hand in hand. The world seemed to pause to let them through. She recongized this was the couple, Lace had told her about the last time she visited. How envious she was of them, born and raised in Jamaica they had been married 60 years. They were grade school sweethearts but didn't start seriously dating until high school. She slightly younger than he by three years, honored her parents request, that he wait until her graduation. They'd never known anyone else but one another, he married her a week after her graduation at one of the biggest weddings on the island. As they passed, they smiled, saying hello to Seren with their eyes.

Serenity prayed a new prayer, Dear God, if I am to marry, I want to be an example of love like the blessings you bestowed upon them. To grow old with someone, combating disappointment, turmoil and disagreement with love of another. A forever love, please lord when he takes my hand, I want us to mean it when we say, I look past your faults as you look past mine, our evolution is ours to master as society passes away. Truth and trust will be our foundation, along with continuing to pray when faced with confusion and pain. This is how true love is made. If it is your will, Amen.

[Love©®]

Serenity's Prayer (For Bandanna)

<font color="purple">Part X Serenity’s Resurrection </font>

Reggae Beach was alive with the sharp and smooth sounds of the island. The Domino tournament was in full swing. Lace and Seren were dancing the sun set into evening, their hips slowly moving in tune to the rhythms of the night. Soon the bon fire would light and the real fun would begin. Jerk Chicken and Pork was being cooked on two different street grills on either side of the beach. Treasure had been left with a nanny to allow the adults some unrestricted fun. This was the third week of Seren's trip and she was enjoying every minute of it. Tanning nicely and eating way to much, no guilt, just pure delight and exhilaration.

She managed to stay cordial to Tahir but never spent more than 5 minutes alone with him. Apparently, he split his time between visiting his mother and Lionel and that suited her just fine. Tonight he played domino's with his brother and lost rather quickly. Drinking, smoking and eating, you could say, IRIE was definitely in the air. Seren loosened up and danced with a few guys on the beach. She could wind her hips in a perfect 360 degree, circular motion. It was downright hypnotizing. The few that attempted to enter her realm, eventually moved away frustrated. When they intruded in on her personal space, she quickly moved up, her hips not missing a beat.

Tahir watched her from the shadows, closely, laughing at the men trying their best to take advantage of her intoxication. She looked so beautiful tonight, wearing a long blue, green and white pastel cotton dress, that flaired at the bottom. Her twist down, wildly framing her face. When she turned, her long beaded necklace followed.

Tahir understood, her dance was a celebration of herself, a homage to the earth. She would allow them to celebrate with her, but not take the energy she was giving out to the world.

He saw his chance to talk to her, she started to walk the length of the beach and finally came to sit alone on the tides edge. Tahir cautiously approached her. Is the water warm he asked? Perfectly, she said with a smile, deciding to be nice. May I sit with you awhile, I promise to leave when you ask. Seren waved him down.

How are enjoying yourself? Wonderfully, thank you. How about you? Yes, I don't get here much anymore, its nice to spend this much time with my family and friends. Where are you visting from? The states, Florida to be precise. Really? I'm from Florida. Wow, Tahir said excited. See how small the world is.

Tahir and Seren spent about a half hour talking about Florida alone. Tahir explained his father, a citizen of Sierra Leone, had met his mother while on a business trip to Jamaica. He was an export/import negotiator for the US and came to discuss trade relations with some of the farmers there. One thing led to another and I was produced. They loved one another, but my mom turned down his hand in marriage. She didn't want to travel all over the earth, especially with a small child. My mom unmarried and not making a lot of money eventually sent me to my father. See I have dual citizenship and a visa from the states through my fathers job. Wow, Seren was dumbfounded. So what are you? What am I? Yeah what do you call yourself, what nationality? And that's important because? Seren tried to come up with an intelligent answer. I'm human Serenity. Traveling like I have, I don't fall victim to the small thinking of race and man made borders. My blood is red like every mammal on the planet, I claim nor deny any part of my heritage. I simply am.

Seren, was impressed. She just conversed in a way unlike never before. Someone with a different opinion, his own. Lace called out, come on you two...time to go.

2:00, 3:00, 4:00 in the morning, she and Tahir talked about almost everything. They both fell asleep in their respective chairs, much to the delight of Lace who came down in the morning to prepare breakfast. She woke them, they both decided to climb the stairs and get a proper rest.

From that moment on, they were inseperable. The next three weeks, almost the end of Seren's summer trip, they did everything together. From simple walks, to kisses under hidden waterfalls. He took her fishing, the chef preparing their catch under a candlelit night. He showed her places on the island she didn't even know existed, the food tasted the better, the air clearer, the music had deeper meaning and she could have sworn a double rainbow painted the sky daily, with or without a rainfall.

One night, after they put Treasure down from a day at the beach. They sat on the couch and recounted the day. Lace and Lionel had already turned in for the night.

You think she had fun. Yes, thank you again for taking us, she had a ball. I never let her get to close to the men I'm dating but this time it was okay. How did mommy enjoy herself? I enjoyed myself just fine, Seren's shyness showing as her eyes focused on her lap. Tahir took her hand. Serenity, this has been, well I've had a wonderful time with you. I leave tomorrow for the states but hope you'll allow me to return and accompany you home next week. Tahir, I would love that, but I don't think I'm ready for another relationship right now. This is happening way to fast. I don't know what I'm feeling. I need to take it slow. I just don't think I can trust any man especially one from here. Damon... Stop. Serenity, dont you dare say his name. You are not to bring him up ever again. Not to me, not to anyone. Seren, taken a back, looked annoyed &amp; confused. Why am I not allowed to tell you how much he hurt me? I need you to understand why I.... Serenity! You need not dwell there, his name, the thought of him keeps you in pain, keeps you held in a stagnant place. How can you move forward with me, life, don't you ever want to love wholely again? What do you want to do with your life? Well I would like to open a restaurant some day. What's stopping you? Seren rolled her eyes. Ummm money, lack of education, name it. What have you done to better yourself? Well I couldn't, I mean I haven't because... Because, Tahir asked? Seren looked down, she still hadn't told him about her Lupus. Because nothing, never mind. Time waits for no one dear Serenity. If you spend it analyzing what went wrong in your past, unwilling to close that door, there is no way you can open or walk through a new one.

I want to be with you Serenity, I want to spoil you and make you happy. You are my one. Say your name. What, Seren said quietly, her eyes filling with tears, blurring her vision of him. Baby say your name. Seren. No your given name. That is my given name. Have you not noticed, I don't call you Seren but Serenity. Baby, your name is a prayer. It simply means peace and tranquility. When I say your name, that's how I pray for you, how I pray for us.

You should never apologize for putting your all into a relationship that didn't work. Never forgive yourself for something that needs no apology. I am here to nourish the beauty and love of your heart. How could you know what you wanted, if God had not shown you what you didn't want. Tahir reached to wipe the tears now streaking down her face, saturating her shirt.

Serenity gave in and felt herself being reborn at that moment. She was the one who passionately kissed him with everything she'd held back for almost the past two years. She let her love flow, the natural arch in her back rose up as he laid her back. Their hair interwined as his body covered hers. He lay between her legs, their breathing labored, he started to remove her clothing after what seemed an hour of kissing and exploring one another's natural creases. It was Tahir who stopped, rising and sighing. Not this way, not here. When you are my wife, I will make love to you. I want to be your first. Serenity, frustatingly fixing her clothes said: Tahir I'm not a virgin. No one has ever made love to you as your husband and I will be your first. Serenity smiled, even though her body was cussing him in languages she didn't even know.

They climbed the stairs hand in hand. Kissed one another at her bedroom door and slept in seperate beds that night.

When she awoke that morning, a single red/orange flower from Lacy's garden lay across of her bed. I'll be back for you to take you home. Wait for me. Remember, I love you. Tahir.

Every fear Seren had about men came flooding in. Lace, Lace, she called trying to wake her friend without disturbing Lionel. Lace caught her desperate look and managed to get out of bed unnoticed.

I'm in love with him. I know Seren, its wonderful. No its not! He doesn't know about my Lupus, there's Treasure and goodness the bills for Tahji's college. Who am I to be a burden to this man. Seren, your being silly, he cares about you, just as much as you care about him. He's a good guy Seren. He wants to marry me? What's wrong with that, its about time you let someone in. I can't even give him children. No Lace. I'm going home. Seren! Lace, I'm going home!! Get me on tomorrow mornings flight. What am I going to tell him when he calls. Tell him whatever you want Lace but dont give him my contact information. You're my friend remember.

That day Lace helped Serene pack. Seren's joints began t ache, her joints started to hurt due to the stress. Lionel made her some ginger tea and chicken soup, she relaxed listening to the rain fall the rest of the day. She missed Tahir so much, she ached and couldn't remember life before he entered hers.

By morning, she and Treasure headed home. Her heart broken, she knew she made the right decision. Better to hurt now than later. He deserves someone who can offer him everything I can't.

<font color="red"> This Story Will Conclude Tomorrow!! Have a wonderful Saturday!</font>

[Love©®]

Serenity's Prayer (For Bandanna)

<font color="purple"> Part XI Serenity’s Sacrifice
</font>

In the Absence of Light, Darkness Will Prevail.


Mundane days, followed mundane nights. Tahir called almost endlessly until Seren finally changed the number. His letters returned unopened, he finally decided to pay her a visit. Lacy, at the risk of losing her friendship with Seren, told Tahir everything, including her bouts with Lupus. Lacy's calls, letters and pleas seemed to follow Tahir's. Seren never responded to anyone.

He came to my house momma, please let us stay here a few nights. Of course, but I told you not to mess with those kinds of men anyway. Seren, rolled her eyes and re-thought her plan to stay with her mom. It was only until she was sure Tahir wouldn't return to her house. Darlin' you need to attend church with me on Sunday, there's a ton of nice American men you can fellowship with. Pastor said... her words began to fade into a bevy of blah, blah, blah much like Charlie Brown's teacher. No one but Lace and Lionel really knew what happened. There were a choice few acquaintences she shared her experience with. They all put Tahir down. Didn't they hear me? It was me, its me, not him. Maybe Christian Singles Night would help, her mother's voice started to pour back in. Mom, would you mind if I left Treasure here for awhile? Well, okay but what about you. Seren put on her bravest smile, I'll be fine momma, you can reach me on my cell, okay. In about a week, I'll be back for lil T. Seren checked into the Sheraton downtown and there she laid in the fetal position for most of the week.

knock, knock, knock.... a repetitious noise came from Mrs. Williams door. Hold on, hold on, Seren did you forget something? I'm coming. Mrs. Williams swung opened her door and Tahir stood there, silently commanding her attention. Mrs. Williams, I'm Tahir, Seren's friend. I know who you are, she said with much sarcasm. I apologize for the intrusion, is Seren here? No she's not and I don't know where she is. Why don't you just leave her alone, she's not interested! With all due respect Mrs. Williams, I love your daughter, she is my soul mate. I'm fighting for us, she will be my wife with or without your blessing. Tahir softened his tone, may I please just talk to you for a moment. Please, Mrs. Williams, his eyes begged. Mrs. Williams let him in against her better judgement.


<font color="purple">Part XII Serenity’s Sanctuary***Finale***</font>

Five months later, Seren had all but put the affair behind her. She started working on the business plan for her restaurant and began taking online classes. She and Lace spoke sporadically as long as she promised not to mention the incident in any way.

<font color="red"> You Have Been Cordially Invited
To the 2006 Miami Black White
Annual Fundraiser Ball for Aspiring Entreprenuers.

Miami Beach Convention Center

November 25, 2006
8:00 pm

Black/White Attire Mandatory </font>

Yeah Lace, I got this invitation in the mail for like some type of ball, think i'm going to attend. I haven't been anywhere in such a long time. What date is it on? November 25th. Well RSVP for two, maybe I'll fly in and accompany you. Seren smiled, that would be nice. I really didn't want to go alone.

Where are you?! I'm on my way girl, sorry the plane was delayed. I'll just change at your house, we're going to be late. Seren was not one to be fashionably late. We're going to miss the networking session. Seren it will be fine. I'll be there shortly, I'm on my way to the rental car place now. Okay, see ya in a bit. Seren began to apply her MAC makeup neatly arranged in order of application. Her satin white dress hung like royalty on her closet door. She went all out and bought a Dior, rounded neckline, back out dress. Invoking memories of old Hollywood, she accented the look with long white gloves, that carressed her arms, just past her elbow. She wore white Mary Jane stilettos, gold clasp, with pointed toe. Her look completed with a sheer white wrap that shimmered with specks of gold dust reflecting off her hazel/green eyes.

Tahir seeped into her thoughts every now and again. While she dressed, concentrating, she quickly replaced the thought of him with her business aspirations. Though she hadn't started the restaurant yet, she was awaiting the loan approval. The banker said she had a really good shot. She had the spot picked out and everything. Seren was anxious to dive in and start.

She felt like a woman, a sensuous, sexy woman. She sprayed a little Curve for Women on her pulse points and winked her eye at the reflection in the mirror. Time to go sexy, your audience awaits. She laughed knowing she was a legend in her own mind.

Damn! Where's Lace? Seren looked at her watch. Is she serious??? Seren she heard someone call. Sareeeeeeeeeeeen What now? Why didn't she just ring the bell! She's got to take a shower, do her hair, get dressed, Serene cussed as she swung opened the door to the most beautiful black stretch limo she ever saw. Lacy's wonderful face, her hair returned to her natural blonde color, smiled wider than ever. Surprise! I thought you might want to travel in style. Girl, you, mannnn! I knew there was a reason why I love you so much. Grab that bag and come on, we're going to late!

Stop Playing!! Lionel? What are you doing here? Serenity. How are you. I'm fine, how bout you Mr. Tall Dark and Handsome. Lionel smiled and shook his head forward. Ahh... a yes nod, I've never seen that before. They looked the perfect couple. Lacy wore a short black on one side, white on the other, off the shoulder dress. A modest black bow which hugged her hips, really brought the dress out. The straps of her shoes were all rhinestones at the ankle and the toe. Long feathered earrings swayed from her ears. Lionel didn't wear a tux but a comfortable linen darkest black button down suit. His dreads hung lose, showing pre-mature silver signs of age. Serenity noticed that Lionel wore the platinum watch Lacy had given him on their anniversary. He vowed never to wear it, he didn't like shiny and materialistic things. Serenity thought to herself, I guess thats what a loving marriage is, compromise.

Thanks for coming you two, were going to have some fun now! Where's Treasure? She's with mom tonight. How's Tahji, he's well. He was suppose to be home this week but stayed on campus. You know, first year away from home. All I get is laundry and request for care packages. Oh, chilled champagne, you went out Lace as always. Pour girl pour.

Good evening sir. Seren felt like Cinderella at the ball. At midnight she knew it was pumpkin time. We're here for the Black/White Entreprenuer Benefit. Yes, Ms. Serenity Williams, we've been awaiting your arrival. Awaiting My Arrival??? Party of two? Ah, we have one more if its not to much trouble. Mr. Escoffrey I presume? Yes, answered Lionel. We have you under a seperate ticket. Seren looked back? How did he know who he was? Wow, either technology has vastly improved or this man is psychic. Seren immediately got nervous. She felt her back was to exposed, her make up wasn't correct, I can't go in there yet Lace, let's stop by the powder room. We're late, they will all look at us when we walk in. You look fine Seren, its the networking hour, no one will be looking at you. The place was beautiful, crystal chandliers, winding brass and glass stairways, yup definitely going to be a pumpkin tonight, Serene smirked. The room's off to the right, through those doors I think. Lace held her girlfriends hand, Lionel followed close behind. Seren took a deep breath and allowed her girl to open the door. This is the wrong room, its dark. No one's here, there must be some mistake. A slow reversal of the dimmer switch began to reveal the attendees in the room. It seemed like a dream you wake up from and can't tell where you are. Surprise, everyone said in a nervous, reserved but enthusiastic manner. Immediately her eyes darted back and forth. Not my birthday, but there's my mom and Treasure. Tahji, Tahji's here, she looked at Lace in confusion. Lace turned her around and pointed to the podium.

From Somewhere, Everywhere it seemed KEM began to Sing:

<font color="green"> I see the way you look at me
As if to say its right
I pray for you day in and day out

Something's happening to me
The man I used to be is gone
He gave up his life
So I could go on
Girl, on in heaven
Where the love of a lifetime resides
In you
Girl there's heaven in you
Oh Girl and it's so meant to be
This place where two souls collide
There's no pain, no fear, only you and I

See I spent my lifetime
Trying to find it
I want you baby
I want to give my love to you
Heaven's right there in your heart girl
</font>

There was a hush over the room, no one knew what Serenity would do. By the time the music began to end, Tahir was holding Serenity's hand, singing "My Heaven's inside of you" over and over again. Serenity still couldn't quite grasp what happened, her mind was full of thoughts but only one voice was louder than all the rest. She could only hear him, her thoughts were filled with this marvelous man in front of her. She didn't want to run anymore, why had she hid for so long, she wanted to fall in his arms and rest there forever. The coolest tears filled her almond shaped eyes. They fell upon his hands and he began to fall to his knees. Serenity Mercy Williams, will you do me the honor of being my wife, for a life time without end. Will you let me love you and take care of you. Guide you and protect you. Make you my queen and give you a piece of any kingdom I have? This I ask you in front of God, our family and friends. Everyone in the room was silent, not a muscle moved watching lifes reality television unfold in front of them.

Seren looked to her mother's blessing for an answer. Mrs. Williams who spent three hours listening to Tahir's plan's for him and Seren nooded an ecstatic yes. Lionel held Lacy tightly at his side, she moved toward Seren who seemed to be caught in time. Fall girl, she whispered, open your arms, hold your head back, take a deep breath and fall. Seren met Tahir on his knees, submitting to him as he just submitted to her.

....A year to that day they became Mr. and Mrs. Tahir Kamara and are attempting to maintain their happily ever after. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

The End....