Funny Car Stories

[Magician]

Re: Funny Car Stories

Di white car mi did have (same one mi wreck later - see old cars thread) had a small problem. Gas gauge nuh wuk. Mi seh a small problem caw mi have a system.

1. You fill up the car - always and reset the Trip to zero.
2. You drive x-amount a miles you know you have before you
need to full up again.

So mi modda borra di car one day and instead a full up di car she only put in $5, but as per the procedure, she reset the trip to 0.

Next ting yuh know mi de pon route 1 in Jersey (we we just move from NYC) an di cyaar run outta petrol! But wait! Mi still have 200 miles fi run before fuel done.

Now Route 1 have a fair amount of businesses on it, but this section have nothing! Luckily I had a red fuel canister fi go capture some petrol in.

But this is Jersey, and as Jkid already tried nobody nuh go stop fi nobody. Even a likkle yute wid a red canister weh obviously need a lift to the gas station.

Worse still it started to rain an a soso t-shirt mi did a wear. Cho. So mi walk bout a mile til mi find a hotel an beg a concierge gi mi a ride to the gas station and back. Afta dat mi modda nuh use di car again.

[Magician]

Re: Funny Car Stories

Dis ya story involve one taxi.


Coming from Belize, to get to the ancient Mayan city of Tikal in Guatemala, you affi lef your rental at the border and catch a taxi the remaining 2 hours drive, of which first half is not paved an full a pothole.

The deportee taxi look mash up bad, but being the only one there mi an mi friend had no choice but to copp it. As soon as we start drive mi know seh sintin nuh right! Some grinding nise a come from the back, a screeching sound from the front, and a shudder throughout.

So we stop, driver kicks the tire (that looks too big for the car, and bigger than the other 3) and exclaims in Spanish:
"No Problema!"


We drive on, and the noises are getting worse, the engine is struggling with the extra resistance, and soon nuff it's evident to the driver that some action is required.

So we stop, find two rockstone fi prop di veekle, rotate the tires so now the big one is in the front, and drive on.
"No problema!"


We get off the dut road and catch some pavement, although full a pothole still. Now all this time a bare bush and we finally reach the first village! By village I mean 4 huts and 2 sleeping policeman on a road that don't get no traffic but wi!
We manage to get over the first sleeping policeman fine. When we climb the second, there's a clunk, a bam! and we jerk to a sudden stop. A lady on the side of the road looks in our direction, points, and starts to dead wid laff!

So the driver comes out, looks under the car and says slowly:
"Problema, Problema, Problema!"


The entire driveshaft fell off and was resting on the asphalt. The two back wheels spread out and were angled at like so /---\ and the big front tire was gone.
The lady sent her 5 year old boy on his bicycle to the nearest town 20km away to summon a mechanic! Time to assess our situation....
-We're in Guatemala illegally (that's another story)
-We're in the middle of nowhere
-This taxi is beyond repair
-There hasn't been any other cars on this road in 2 hours!

By the grace of God a couple hours later a acr passed by and we hitchhiked the rest of the way to Tikal.
On the way back, before accepting another taxi, we did a 10-point inspection, to the amusement of the driver.

[j-kid]

Re: Funny Car Stories

Magix, jus di visual ah dis whole store inna Guatemala ah kill me wid laugh! Laaad, mi stomach ah hut mi!!!!!!!!!!!

[j-kid]

Re: Funny Car Stories

MSU students on bus trip Kidnapped in Guatemala:

Source

[Magician]

Re: Funny Car Stories

So it coulda been worse still eeh.