When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

[clairetucker1]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Laurel</div><div class="ubbcode-body">mek me wann fi keep to my house &amp; yard - hidden behind the bush so no eye must fall upon my presense ... you know - one of the 'countless upon countless old white heavy set ugalee type' ...

**sigh** </div></div>

Now Miss Laurel, you are one of the most beautiful people I've ever met (inside and out).

[Marilyn]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: scotgirl</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Laurel</div><div class="ubbcode-body">mek me wann fi keep to my house &amp; yard - hidden behind the bush so no eye must fall upon my presense ... you know - one of the 'countless upon countless old white heavy set ugalee type' ...

**sigh** </div></div>

Now Miss Laurel, you are one of the most beautiful people I've ever met (inside and out).

</div></div>


Tell har

[hannahcommunications]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Marilyn</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Well now this is a rich post....could bring on a whole lot of conversation. I find much of this to be true...but hell I got scammed big time in Memphis 4 months ago, and I am still in court over it...so all round the world, same old song. Just cause Jamaica is pretty, no one told you it would be perfect. You keep looking for Nirvana on earth and your days will be gone while you are looking....

Why people want to even try to hold Jamacia to a standard different from dem own yaad mi neva unnastand or overstand. </div></div>

Completely agree. I would add though that it depends on the area that you decide to &quot;settle&quot; in. I don't want to knock tourist spots like Negril as I love vacationing there, but I know many of my own Jamaican relatives are dead-set against visiting Negril because it is too touristy and they fear the kind of atmosphere described by this blogger.

It just seems to me that sometimes very savvy people don't apply the same judgment they practice at home when they go to Jamaica.

[Marilyn]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: StAnnMuse</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Marilyn</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Well now this is a rich post....could bring on a whole lot of conversation. I find much of this to be true...but hell I got scammed big time in Memphis 4 months ago, and I am still in court over it...so all round the world, same old song. Just cause Jamaica is pretty, no one told you it would be perfect. You keep looking for Nirvana on earth and your days will be gone while you are looking....

Why people want to even try to hold Jamacia to a standard different from dem own yaad mi neva unnastand or overstand. </div></div>

Completely agree. I would add though that it depends on the area that you decide to &quot;settle&quot; in. I don't want to knock tourist spots like Negril as I love vacationing there, but I know many of my own Jamaican relatives are dead-set against visiting Negril because it is too touristy and they fear the kind of atmosphere described by this blogger.

It just seems to me that sometimes very savvy people don't apply the same judgment they practice at home when they go to Jamaica. </div></div>

Never a truer word did you ever speak. I remember when I first came to this board Bill Evans wrote something I will never forget, he said that some of the wicked from the &quot;real&quot; parts of Jamaica are thrown out because they won't act right, and where is it that you think they go....these ner do wells??? You got it.

[rie]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Seveen</div><div class="ubbcode-body">i've been reading this woman's blog for a while - she quit her corporate attorney job and hit the road - writing travel articles and doing photography - she spent 5 months in jamaica and recently returned


<span style="font-weight: bold">Travel, Smoke and Mirrors: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place</span>
by Lilly


You travel the world and one day, you find a place you love. You can’t quite explain it, but it keeps drawing you back, tugging at your heart. So you come back - once, twice, three times, and then you come back again and stay for five months. You feel a little strange towards the fourth and fifth month, because by then you’re more of a local and you’ve started to see how life really is in this place you love. It’s almost like you finally see the truth of the place you’ve chosen as a temporary home. But still, you’re not quite ready to pay heed to that feeling and so you brush it aside.

Well, sad to say, but the novelty of Jamaica has worn off. Perhaps it’s the recession and everyone looking to make a dime that has made things and people worse here, or just that I’ve finally been here long enough to see the reality, but frankly, I’m over it. I’m finally seeing Jamaica for what it is. The good as well as the bad. And the bad, is so ugly.

Is it the culture of denigrating women and treating them like sex objects? Men treating women or their wives like interchangeable things, that they drop whenever they’re bored or whenever a new cute white tourist comes into town? Or is it the dancehall songs that shout nasty lyrics like “poom poom” (sex) and “you better keep it tight, keep it tight” or “bend over, bend over, bend over”? Must I really stand there and listen to this garbage, and witness women degrading themselves at parties or in clubs, bending over and grinding their behinds on the man, girating like they are having sex in public, while the man just sits back, his legs spread out, and watches?

Or even still, is it the never-ending sexual innuendos and getting hit on by every single or married man, or actually any male with a penis, most of whom are only looking for a way out of the island, the woman’s money (key word: “invest”), and don’t give a hoot about the woman herself? And must I really watch countless and countless white women tourists (usually the unattractive, heavy-set types) fool themselves into a relationship with a Jamaican, who is just using them for what they have and a potential greencard and an “investment”?

Or perhaps it’s the folks you get to meet and become your “friends” - except they’re really only your friends if you bring them new shoes and clothes, or cell phones, or tip them for every little thing they do for you while you are on their island. Because after all, you have money - yes, you are vacationing so you must be rich. And therefore, you must give away the money you worked so hard and saved for half a year to afford a vacation.

And maybe still it’s the incredible number of scam artists running the streets these days, because of these tough times. In my decades of travel, I had never been swindled or conned before. Well, it finally happened. Last weekend was “ATI weekend” in Negril - I’ll spare you a long description and basically say, it’s Jamaican Spring Break. Young Jamaicans come down from every corner of the island (mostly from Kingston), as well as the States to party non-stop for four days. Let me tell you, ATI makes the regular American Spring Break look like kindergarten. By the end of the third day, we were sick and tired of seeing half-to-naked sixteen and eighteen year old girls going to parties in nothing more than their thongs.

In any case, the only positive part of ATI is the live music concerts - and my friends and I wanted to see the Sizzla show on the beach. Two men - one of whom was their so-called “friend” (see description above), came along and told us of this show and said it was only $1,200 JA to get in, and it would be that same evening. Because he was their “friend,” they didn’t suspect anything, and neither did I. Because normally, I would never buy a show ticket or arm band other than from the official source or ticket outlets.

So we bought the arm bands for entry to the show, five of us at $1,200 each (US $15) and off we went that night to the venue - Long Bay Beach Park. Well, we get there and there’s not much happening. Could we have the wrong venue? No we didn’t. We find out from the security at the gate that the show had taken place in the afternoon, Sizzla had already performed, and the entrance fee was actually 500 JA ($5 US). It turns out that we were sold the armbands while the show was already happening.

OK - so we were had. It wasn’t a huge amount - but what made it worse was that this man had supposedly been a “friend” for six years - and my friends had brought him so many gifts over the years. Ironically, the day he sold us the tickets, he was wearing one of the tee-shirts they had bought him the year before.

Of course, I would be remiss not to mention the good parts of Jamaica - the scenery, hands down, the cliffs, the beach, the calmness and peace…the sheer beauty of the countryside. There are also good-hearted Jamaicans - the ones who are not so corrupt and live away from the tourist zones, like in the parish of Saint Elizabeth. And then there’s the chance to hear live reggae music regularly (roots reggae). But now, it’s clear to me: you have to know what you are planning to do when you visit here, and you have to have your guard up all the time - especially as a woman. Perhaps rent a villa or apartment and BYOF (bring your own friends), schedule your own activities and enjoy the beaches, the scenery and the food. Use the place for its true purpose, as another friend noted: calmless, peace and reflection. And then go back home. And then come back if you must.

But living in Jamaica? Not for the faint of heart. And definitely not the ideal place for women…

Within a week of my return, I was honestly ready to go home. If it had not been for my three fabulous friends here with me, I probably would have paid the $150 airline change fee to go home. I was over the bull, over the lies, and over the superficial layer that permeates in developing countries due to the ever-growing rich/poor gap.

But mostly I’m glad the veil is lifted and I saw the reality. Vacation or even sabbaticals are so different from real life. And maybe the key is to keep traveling until you find the right place for you. Perhaps that is the lesson as I continue my travels. I may not have written Jamaica off completely, and I still love parts of it, but I think it will be a good while before I return…

If anyone’s ever felt disillusioned with a place they thought was paradise, I’d really like to hear the stories! Please feel free to share, we could all benefit from it.


</div></div>

I hope any one of you who plan to retire to Jamaica take this to heart. If you do plan to retire there, make sure it is a gated community with 24 hour security and that will not always keep you safe. Returning residents houses are built like fort knox with bars on all the windows and doors. I don't want to ever give up my USA heath care and the freedom to sleep with my windows open.

I miss the food but I have over the years planted many of my favorite Jamaican foods and there for I enjoy the fruits of my labor. Jamaica nah easy. I do not get begged for something everytime I walk out the door and in my senior years I do not want to be kept awake all night by a loud sound system that nothing can be done to stop.

As for the sex on ATI you should see what goes on in a country party. Children that can barely walk whind as good as any teenager or adult and sex for 'things' starts in graade 6 or 7. I will go back one day but it must be over to Port Antonio as I have never seen that side. I will bring my own friends and I hope and pray I don't let my guard down and get swindled or conned.

I used to love Jamaica, but it's turned to drugs, scams and Murders for nothing at all except what you worked so hard all your life for. JMHO

[Marilyn]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

and the freedom to sleep with my windows open.


<span style="font-size: 14pt">Good for you and whatever city or state you live in, because I am afraid to go out to get my morning paper or open my garage to go out. I would never dream of sleeping with a window open here. In my particular neighborhood we had the Hacks Cross Creeper, who raped several women and his specialty was unlocked windows and doors for entry (for those stupid enough to still do that here). </span>

[Nanook]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I used to love Jamaica, but it's turned to drugs, scams and Murders for nothing at all except what you worked so hard all your life for. JMHO</div></div>

Coming up on the one year anniversary of the day Uncle Sam and his girlfriend went missing and are presumed murdered I happen to agree with this wholeheartedly.

Marilyn, if I were you I would get the heck out of there too. That is not the way to live! Up here in God's country we don't even know where our house keys are. Most people leave their keys in the cars in their yard.

I don't know anyone who locks their doors!

[jaith2]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

the greatest delusion is thinking any place is &quot;safe&quot;...

nan....those months you were hauling water up there in &quot;God's Country&quot;, you could have slipped &amp; broke a hip &amp; froze to death...

how about that couple in fl with all the special needs kids that were murdered in their &quot;secure&quot; home...

nobody gets out of this world alive, so you best be happy where you're at.

[Nanook]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

You are so right jaith! Anyone can be taken at random but there are places where the chances increase. Not saying it can't happen here, but...the chance is so slim that I never give it a passing thought! yeah I could fall and freeze to death very easily hauling water or just walking to the shop. I tread carefully cause of it! God bless loops for turning me on to cleats!

[rie]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

Forget about the windows open! I just live in a pretty good area where we can do that.

I'm talking it is not even safe for returning residents, business owners, and the average jamaican, black or white.

Does anyone remember when PeeWee went missing off the cliffs of Negril? Well the scuttle but was his own family was behind it??!!

I grew up there with my mom for a good part of my life. I saw what went on day in and out. You are my friend if you have money, make friends that do have money. Make friends with the taxi drivers so they give you things and if they carry you out do what them want so you get more. Finally my mother 'fell' out of love with the place and we came back over here to the U.

Poverty is a crime and there is too much of it in Jamaica.

I traveled back many a time after we left. And who I thought were my true friends , well I was in for a lot more surprises than I care to remember as well as a lot of hurt feelings.

Port Antonio one day....maybe

[Nanook]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

I hear you loud and clear. And you are so right!

[Peasie]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

Sometimes you can fall <span style="font-weight: bold">out</span> of love with a place and then fall <span style="font-weight: bold">in</span> love again.
Keep an open mind? Definitely
Keep your windows open? Maybe

[Seveen]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

there have been times i've left jamaica in disgust promising never to return again

then that &quot;itch&quot; comes - and nothing satisfies it like going to jamaica

familiarity breeds contempt

i have learned to stay a &quot;tourist&quot; when i'm in jamaica and that has made it much better for me

[Nanook]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

Peasie that is my plan to try again. There are places I want to go and spend time that I haven't before. Like Port Antonio and other places out that way. But the plain and simple truth is that traveling the way I used to is a thing of the past. I am not sure I can adapt but I've willing to give it a whirl.

[Dr.Dudd]

Re: When You Fall Out of Love With A Place

So what does pee we or whatever his or her name is being killed by relatives relate to being unique to changes in the Jamaican society. People kill family just about everywhere. The Jamaican situation did not come about because of any wanton degradation of the Jamaican population. It Came about as a result of conscious efforts to return it to colonialism by first declaring it a failed state, then use the UN to give the authority to the colonial masters. This is not unique to Jamaica, bit is the goal for all the black majority third world countries. They only exist as a farm colony for the colonial masters. Nothing has changes, That is in relation to the intent only the conditions .
This condition that it is in, is essential to create the international consensus, to enact the relevant declarations to return it to colonial state. This is not unique to Jamaica as I stated. It is all in the plans.

Jamaica like all other former colonies was ans still forced to supply their production to former colonists at rates that doe not allow them to support social services to maintain a safe society.The laws are the same ones that prevents the black Jamaicans from being able to secure themselves against criminals. All this is not an accident. They have their goals and these are tools to achieve them. Jamaicans are no more violent than people anywhere else. Al you have to do is to remove the forms of security in any other jurisdiction to the extent it is absent in Jamaica and it will be the same or probably worse.form
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Teshamae</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Forget about the windows open! I just live in a pretty good area where we can do that.

I'm talking it is not even safe for returning residents, business owners, and the average Jamaican, black or white.

Does anyone remember when PeeWee went missing off the cliffs of Negril? Well the scuttle but was his own family was behind it??!!

I grew up there with my mom for a good part of my life. I saw what went on day in and out. You are my friend if you have money, make friends that do have money. Make friends with the taxi drivers so they give you things and if they carry you out do what them want so you get more. Finally my mother 'fell' out of love with the place and we came back over here to the U.

Poverty is a crime and there is too much of it in Jamaica.

I traveled back many a time after we left. And who I thought were my true friends , well I was in for a lot more surprises than I care to remember as well as a lot of hurt feelings.

Port Antonio one day....maybe </div></div>