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We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming to bring you this special JA.com report from the Republican National Convention…..
Sources close to JA.com are now reporting that our very own <span style="font-weight: bold">Mrs. Skelly </span>will shortly arrive in St. Paul, MN to make a statement to the media gathered at Xcel Energy Center --- Skelly’s statement has been characterized as having potentially grave ramifications to the Republican Party’s hopes for winning the 2008 Presidential Election.
Joining us to speculate on the content of Mrs. Skelly’s statement is JA.com chief I-MAN correspondent, <span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span>and JA.com chief BS correspondent,<span style="font-weight: bold"> SueSumba.</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy:</span> Let me start with you, Error403 3. Mrs. Skelly has been characterized by fellow JA.com member, <span style="font-weight: bold">Venn,</span> as a “man hater” and has been quoted as saying -<span style="font-style: italic">“di way how (she) style an claas im (men)… one woulda tink yuh nat even like di man”. </span> Do you believe that Mrs. Skelly’s pending announcement is simply a ploy to promote her anti-male agenda?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> yu sure yu wan mi tuh ansa this—
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy:</span> Ahhhh…. Yes?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0: </span> ….. are yuh ABSOLUTELY SURE?
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm….. I did ask the question…..
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> Well…. if Skelly wan advertise har nassy irritating habit pon di front page adi Gleaner--a fi har perogative dat.
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> BUT…. She’s not just advertising in the Jamaican Gleaner. She’s scheduled a press conference on the eve of the RNC. What do you think her motives are?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (rolleyes):</span> Nag…nag…nag… it chewsday…. mi nuh need nuh ole rat bite up looking shut bout di place
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm. So, you are dismissing the impact of Mrs. Skelly’s statement by characterizing it as the rantings of a---- man-hating lesbian?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> har have nooooh shame…..
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> <span style="font-style: italic">**clear throat**</span> Well….. shame or not, Mrs. Skelly DOES plan to add a little spice to this convention. We now turn to our chief BS correspondent, SueSumba, for her thoughts. Do you agree with Error403 0’s assessment that Mrs. Skelly’s statement will contain no shame?
<span style="font-weight: bold">SueSumba </span><span style="font-style: italic">(flip off Error403 0)</span>: Im need fi sit his naked butt on the sofa like a badly trained dog…
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm. Well that’s very --enlightening, Sue. Error? Your response?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span><span style="font-style: italic">(get im rackles up-- ready fi ramp wid SueSumba): </span> i most definitely will not sit mi nekkid dutty [censored] on the sofa-(thats jus wrong) . Forcing a guy to watch that is grounds for….
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Impeachment?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (flip off SueSumba): </span> i know if im the last one out of bed to make it...
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Are you alluding that, perhaps, Mrs. Skelly’s statement will address a cover-up within the Republican party, Error?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span><span style="font-style: italic">(nodding):</span> i ALWAYZ put back down the tilet seat <span style="font-style: italic">*trace off*</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Well….. your response, SueSumba?
<span style="font-weight: bold">SueSumba </span><span style="font-style: italic">(laughing at Error, flippant):</span> Funny, caz when i stare daggers at him, he just looks dazed like a clubbed baby seal…
<span style="font-style: italic"> Error lunges after SueSumba. Fight bruk out.</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (push camera frame off fight scene): </span> Ahhh…. Now let’s turn to bink, the third member of our panel and the only person on JA.com who has NOT been to Negril since a Democratic president has been in office (and, more notably, since the opening of the Tropical Rui resort). Bink, what do you make of this last-minute press conference by our always-controversial, Mrs. Skelly?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Bink </span> <span style="font-style: italic">(look pon fight bruk out, rolleyes): </span> is the jungle really worth a venture for two who are no longer into the club scene? (ie: TOO LANG A TOOF FI FIGHT?)
<span style="font-style: italic">Camera pan back to fight. SueSumba has Error in a head lock….</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy </span><span style="font-style: italic">(push camera away again): </span> I am referring to Mrs. Skelly’s pending statement to open the RNC. Do you have a comment, bink?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Bink </span><span style="font-style: italic">(ignoring Lacy):</span> This is so why i look to you ole’ folks for inspiration…. <span style="font-style: italic">(cheering on SueSumba)</span> You GO girl!
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy </span><span style="font-style: italic">(holding SueSumba off of Error while bink eggs her on): </span> You’re watching a special report from JA.com at the RNC in St. Paul. We’ll return shortly to continue our discussion on the surprise appearance and announcement by Mrs. Skelly after this short message from Milo……
Sources close to JA.com are now reporting that our very own <span style="font-weight: bold">Mrs. Skelly </span>will shortly arrive in St. Paul, MN to make a statement to the media gathered at Xcel Energy Center --- Skelly’s statement has been characterized as having potentially grave ramifications to the Republican Party’s hopes for winning the 2008 Presidential Election.
Joining us to speculate on the content of Mrs. Skelly’s statement is JA.com chief I-MAN correspondent, <span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span>and JA.com chief BS correspondent,<span style="font-weight: bold"> SueSumba.</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy:</span> Let me start with you, Error403 3. Mrs. Skelly has been characterized by fellow JA.com member, <span style="font-weight: bold">Venn,</span> as a “man hater” and has been quoted as saying -<span style="font-style: italic">“di way how (she) style an claas im (men)… one woulda tink yuh nat even like di man”. </span> Do you believe that Mrs. Skelly’s pending announcement is simply a ploy to promote her anti-male agenda?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> yu sure yu wan mi tuh ansa this—
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy:</span> Ahhhh…. Yes?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0: </span> ….. are yuh ABSOLUTELY SURE?
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm….. I did ask the question…..
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> Well…. if Skelly wan advertise har nassy irritating habit pon di front page adi Gleaner--a fi har perogative dat.
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> BUT…. She’s not just advertising in the Jamaican Gleaner. She’s scheduled a press conference on the eve of the RNC. What do you think her motives are?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (rolleyes):</span> Nag…nag…nag… it chewsday…. mi nuh need nuh ole rat bite up looking shut bout di place
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm. So, you are dismissing the impact of Mrs. Skelly’s statement by characterizing it as the rantings of a---- man-hating lesbian?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0:</span> har have nooooh shame…..
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> <span style="font-style: italic">**clear throat**</span> Well….. shame or not, Mrs. Skelly DOES plan to add a little spice to this convention. We now turn to our chief BS correspondent, SueSumba, for her thoughts. Do you agree with Error403 0’s assessment that Mrs. Skelly’s statement will contain no shame?
<span style="font-weight: bold">SueSumba </span><span style="font-style: italic">(flip off Error403 0)</span>: Im need fi sit his naked butt on the sofa like a badly trained dog…
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Hmmmm. Well that’s very --enlightening, Sue. Error? Your response?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span><span style="font-style: italic">(get im rackles up-- ready fi ramp wid SueSumba): </span> i most definitely will not sit mi nekkid dutty [censored] on the sofa-(thats jus wrong) . Forcing a guy to watch that is grounds for….
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Impeachment?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (flip off SueSumba): </span> i know if im the last one out of bed to make it...
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Are you alluding that, perhaps, Mrs. Skelly’s statement will address a cover-up within the Republican party, Error?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Error403 0 </span><span style="font-style: italic">(nodding):</span> i ALWAYZ put back down the tilet seat <span style="font-style: italic">*trace off*</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy: </span> Well….. your response, SueSumba?
<span style="font-weight: bold">SueSumba </span><span style="font-style: italic">(laughing at Error, flippant):</span> Funny, caz when i stare daggers at him, he just looks dazed like a clubbed baby seal…
<span style="font-style: italic"> Error lunges after SueSumba. Fight bruk out.</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy</span><span style="font-style: italic"> (push camera frame off fight scene): </span> Ahhh…. Now let’s turn to bink, the third member of our panel and the only person on JA.com who has NOT been to Negril since a Democratic president has been in office (and, more notably, since the opening of the Tropical Rui resort). Bink, what do you make of this last-minute press conference by our always-controversial, Mrs. Skelly?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Bink </span> <span style="font-style: italic">(look pon fight bruk out, rolleyes): </span> is the jungle really worth a venture for two who are no longer into the club scene? (ie: TOO LANG A TOOF FI FIGHT?)
<span style="font-style: italic">Camera pan back to fight. SueSumba has Error in a head lock….</span>
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy </span><span style="font-style: italic">(push camera away again): </span> I am referring to Mrs. Skelly’s pending statement to open the RNC. Do you have a comment, bink?
<span style="font-weight: bold">Bink </span><span style="font-style: italic">(ignoring Lacy):</span> This is so why i look to you ole’ folks for inspiration…. <span style="font-style: italic">(cheering on SueSumba)</span> You GO girl!
<span style="font-weight: bold">JA.com Reporter Lacy </span><span style="font-style: italic">(holding SueSumba off of Error while bink eggs her on): </span> You’re watching a special report from JA.com at the RNC in St. Paul. We’ll return shortly to continue our discussion on the surprise appearance and announcement by Mrs. Skelly after this short message from Milo……
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