Getting drunk on $2.00

[diabolical_Tanya]

Larry and Bob wanted to go out drinking, but they only had $2.00 between them.
Larry said, Hang on, I have an idea. He went next door to the butcher's
shop and spent the $2.00 on one large sausage.
Bob said, Are you crazy? Now we don't have any money left at all! Larry
replied, Don't worry - just follow me.
They went into the pub where Larry immediately ordered two double shots of
Jack Daniels. Bob said, Now you've lost it! Do you know how much trouble we
will be in? We haven't got any money to pay for this!
Larry replied, with a smile, Don't worry, I have a plan. Cheers! They
downed their drinks.
Larry said OK! I'll stick the sausage through my zipper and you get on your
knees and put it in your mouth.
Said and done, the barman noticed them, went berserk, and threw them out.
They continued this, bar after bar, getting more and more
drunk, all for free. At the tenth bar, Bob said, Larry - I don't think I
can do this anymore. My mouth is sore and my knees are killing me! Larry
said, How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage at the third bar!

[Jazz]

Re: Getting drunk on $2.00

*BOAL*n [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img]

TANYA!!!!! TAPPI!!!!

[diabolical_Tanya]

Re: Getting drunk on $2.00

An Irish daughter had not been home for
over five years. Upon her return, her father cursed
her. Where have ye been all this time? Why
did ye not write to us, not even a line? Why didn't
ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old mum thru?
The girl, crying, replied, "Sniff,
sniff... Dad... I became a prostitute..."
"Ye what? Out of here, ye shameless
harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to this family."
"OK, Dad -- as ye wish. I just came back
to give mum this luxurious fur coat, title deed to a ten bedroom
mansion plus a savings certificate for
$5 million."
"For me little brother, this gold Rolex
and for ye daddy, the sparkling new Mercedes limited edition
convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the country
club... (takes a breath)... and an invitation for ye all to spend
New Years' Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera, and..."
"Now what was it ye said ye had become?"
says dad.
Girl, crying again, "Sniff, sniff....a
prostitute dad! Sniff, sniff.
"Oh! Be Jesus! Ye scared me half to
death, girl! I thought ye said a Protestant. Come here and give yer
old man a hug."

[Compry]

Re: Getting drunk on $2.00

BOAL....I didn't see that coming. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] Oh Lord!

[Compry]

Re: Getting drunk on $2.00

Last one wasn't funny. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70400-talktohand.gif[/img]

[Hush Darlin]

Re: Getting drunk on $2.00

so a so u get drunk Tanya
now we kno u likkle sekrit