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Breaking news: Nicolas Cage is quite likely a vampire
Kirk Hooper Sep 19, 2011 40 Comments
Nicolas Cage is without a doubt an eccentric guy, but is he also a vampire? According to an antiques dealer auctioning off the above photo of Cage's Civil War-era doppelganger, yes, yes he is.
"Personally, I believe it's him and that he is some sort of walking undead/vampire, et cetera, who quickens/reinvents himself once every 75 years or so," the seller, Jack Mord, wrote in the eBay listing for the item (which unfortunately has since been pulled down, likely as part of a vast vampire-protecting conspiracy). "150 years from now, he might be a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host."
According to Mord, the man in the picture is Lieutenant G.B. Smith, a Confederate prisoner that was being held at Johnson's Island prison in Ohio when the picture was taken. Or at least that's what he was known as in 1864 - since then he's taken numerous identities, with his latest being the thespian Nicolas Cage.
"My theory is that he allows himself to age to a certain point, maybe 70, 80 or so, then the actor 'Nicolas Cage' will 'die'...but in reality, the undead vampire 'Nicolas Cage' will have rejuvenated himself and appeared in some other part of the world, young again, and ready to start all over," explained Mord in his listing. "From time to time somebody might mention to him that he bears a slight resemblance to the young version of that dead American actor, whose name they can't recall, but eventually, those occurrences will stop altogether."
The evidence seems pretty clear to me, but what do you think - is Nicolas Cage a vampire?
Kirk Hooper Sep 19, 2011 40 Comments
Nicolas Cage is without a doubt an eccentric guy, but is he also a vampire? According to an antiques dealer auctioning off the above photo of Cage's Civil War-era doppelganger, yes, yes he is.
"Personally, I believe it's him and that he is some sort of walking undead/vampire, et cetera, who quickens/reinvents himself once every 75 years or so," the seller, Jack Mord, wrote in the eBay listing for the item (which unfortunately has since been pulled down, likely as part of a vast vampire-protecting conspiracy). "150 years from now, he might be a politician, the leader of a cult, or a talk show host."
According to Mord, the man in the picture is Lieutenant G.B. Smith, a Confederate prisoner that was being held at Johnson's Island prison in Ohio when the picture was taken. Or at least that's what he was known as in 1864 - since then he's taken numerous identities, with his latest being the thespian Nicolas Cage.
"My theory is that he allows himself to age to a certain point, maybe 70, 80 or so, then the actor 'Nicolas Cage' will 'die'...but in reality, the undead vampire 'Nicolas Cage' will have rejuvenated himself and appeared in some other part of the world, young again, and ready to start all over," explained Mord in his listing. "From time to time somebody might mention to him that he bears a slight resemblance to the young version of that dead American actor, whose name they can't recall, but eventually, those occurrences will stop altogether."
The evidence seems pretty clear to me, but what do you think - is Nicolas Cage a vampire?
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