Forgive & Forget

[MarieK]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: loops</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Rundung</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: loops</div><div class="ubbcode-body">i forgive...and if i smoke enough weed...soon enough, i forget too. </div></div>

[img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/eek2.gif[/img] How in God's name do you get wey widd saying dose things when I've seen people get in trouble for much, much less? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/confused.gif[/img]

ADMIN AND MODS HAVE YOU SEEN THIS? Don't we still cater to kids on this site? [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/confused.gif[/img] </div></div>

ah think yuh a di second terd or fwoat smaddy weh come in yah come seh dat an nat wan ting eva been done bout ie </div></div>

boo hoo for you too... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crybaby.gif[/img] </div></div>

sooowij

[MarieK]

Re: Forgive &amp; Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: LadyZ</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Rarely do I forgive, but mi can forget seh mi know de person really well.

Mi have a winning record fe kip malice [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/yahoo.gif[/img] dunno if mi should be happy or sad [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70371-jump.gif[/img] </div></div>

mi nuh think of ie as malice, mi like fi call ie a self preservation technique I used to work with one girl who described my reaction to her as venom [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/laugh.gif[/img] and it worked till the day I left that cow never bothered me again.

[Compry]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I know it is easy to say but do any of you practice this.

</div></div>

Forgiving is easy yes. Forget takes time and believe me it is sweet when you don't lie awake thinking about stuff anymore. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70409-waytogo.gif[/img]

[MarieK]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Compry</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I know it is easy to say but do any of you practice this.

</div></div>

Forgiving is easy yes. Forget takes time and believe me it is sweet when you don't lie awake thinking about stuff anymore. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70409-waytogo.gif[/img] </div></div>


it's not that you lie awake thinking about it. I don't lie awake thinking about that polka dot face witch who gossiped about me I just choose to make it clear that I do not want them anywhere around me.

[Compry]

Re: Forgive & Forget

Not sure if this is the same as malice...but when you've been hurt too many times by the same person, it's best to just move on and not place yourself in the same situation that will get you hurt again.

You can (I can) forgive and move on. To me it's not malice, just self-perservation as you said MarieK.

[LINDA]

Re: Forgive & Forget

Sunshine [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/crybaby.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/704555_dwl.gif[/img]

[BlessedLadyOfZion]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Compry</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Not sure if this is the same as malice...but when you've been hurt too many times by the same person, it's best to just move on and not place yourself in the same situation that will get you hurt again.

You can (I can) forgive and move on. To me it's not malice, just self-perservation as you said MarieK. </div></div>malice mi seh [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70371-jump.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/proud_jamaica.gif[/img]

[Nylah]

Re: Forgive & Forget

You can forgive an person but I dont think you need to forget about it. Why should you? But it doesnt mean you are consumed by what they did to you.

If I forgot the things people have done to me then I'd have no life lessons to pass on.

There was a fascinating documentary on a Canadian channel on the weekend called "The Story of Forgiveness". I chronciled people who had tragic losses and whether they had forgiven their accusers or not.

The ones that dint forgive, like a guy who lost his wife to an IRA bomb, wasnt the contorted dysfunctional mess that people say a person will become if you dont forgive.

He made a good point that he believes in reconciliation but not necessarily forgiveness. Because why should he forgot or forgive the bomber who killed his wife? He formed a group that allowed Catholics and Prodescents(sp?) meet and talk about their experiences, so in his own way he found a path to move his life forward with forgiving or forgetting.

His point was that you make peace that something bad happened b/c you cant go back and change anything. But he didnt feel he needed to forgive anyone because what was done to him was terrible.

I'm not quick to forgive but try to. However, listening to this guy made more sense to me than the "forgive and forget" speeches I have heard.

Make peace that the event happened, dont let them back into your life b/c you've learned life lesson #5237, and keep goin' [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70409-waytogo.gif[/img]

[MarieK]

Re: Forgive & Forget

mi have some people who mi will never forgive and woant figat wah dem duh tuh mi an mi livin fine.

[Nylah]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body">mi have some people who mi will never forgive and woant figat wah dem duh tuh mi an mi livin fine.

</div></div>

Exactly....

[applepie]

Re: Forgive & Forget

Forgiveness is more for you that the person who did the offending. Keeps you free.

[Nunya]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: applepie</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Forgiveness is more for you than the person who did the offending. Keeps you free. </div></div>

Absolutely.

Harbouring resentment, it's said, is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die...

[Nylah]

Re: Forgive & Forget

That's different from what I am saying.

I can make peace twith someone has done b/c how are you going to go back in time and change? You cant.
But deciding that what they did was not okay doesnt mean I am still thinking about them or harbouring resentment.

I guess it's the definition of forgiveness that differs. You can let something go without necessarily forgiving or forgetting.

The girl in high school who stole your boyfriend - yeah forgive 'cause it's all about being kids at that point.
The person who murdered my father.....

[MarieK]

Re: Forgive & Forget

I too beleive that you can let things go without forgiving or forgetting, it's not consuming your life but you still remember it.

Kinda like my wedding a certain person wasn't there, everyone was saying I should forgive because it's the right thing to do.............. yeah right.

[nattydreadgirl]

Re: Forgive & Forget

<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: Mrs. MarieK</div><div class="ubbcode-body"><div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: nattydreadgirl</div><div class="ubbcode-body">I forgive, let go, however, I don't forget! </div></div>

I was told htis weekend [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/kissteeth.gif[/img] seh if if you forgive then you have to forget but if you forget don't you open the door to be betrayed, angered, provoked to wrath again?

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I forgive them, then I let go of the hurt, anger, betrayal or whatever the offense. Some people I choose to forgive and let them continue to be a part of my life, depending what the offense is. However, I never forget, because I don't want to give them the opportunity to commit the offense again. Usually, when I forgive and "forget" that person is not going to be a part of my life any longer, and it doesn't matter whether they are family or friend. I have been blessed that it has been very few people that I have had to put on the "forget" list. I am not a person that can hold grudges, so that makes it easier in a sense for me to forgive.

It is much easier said then done, that I will agree on!