The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

[mountaingal]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

thank you hannah, for that explanation. this is the first time i'm seeing this. i find it interesting that it is a concept used by MEN when talking about selecting a mate. could it be that Christian men see relationships as some kind of battle they are getting themselves in? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[Diplomat]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by (H)AnnA(H):
...Gideon's decision to 'Fleece' (judges 6:36-40)worked for him just as Abraham's decision to take his son to the mountain worked for him. They both ended up where they needed to be - in a position for the Lord to prove Himself to them.

Huh? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img] I am choosing not to engage you on this in this thread, but suffice it to say that the Old Testament and New Testament requirements as it pertains to how we practise faith are different things.

To categorically state that 'fleecing is not faith' is not statement I will make.

Under the new dispensation, we can. That however is a different subject altogether.

[Diplomat]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by Jedi:
Gawd please help dese poh christian females, and in due time draw di rite man into their paths, preferably ones who can open them mout and tell a ooman seh im like har, radda dan she haffee goh compromise har integrity by lookin desparate and runnin im dung all ovah di place. Den nex ting yuh kno im goh seh she a stawk im inna di house of di Lerd. Fawda yuh see di dilemma of some Christian omenses do lawd hasten to help dem.

Amen.

(tawk bout beatin a dead horse to death) [/QB]

You are a trip [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] You have missed the point altogether and I do find it interesting that in the day of gender equality, women's rights and whatever else, that for a female to sit back and wait to be approached is regarded as lady-like. To suggest that a female who approaches someone she may be interested in is compromising her integrity is laughable. Desperation and stalking are not gender specific, and a man could just as easily be regarded as being both. In a lot of ways you have basically validated the general observations.

[tonirand]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

MG,
you are most welcome my dear

[tonirand]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb]

Originally posted by (H)AnnA(H):
...Gideon's decision to 'Fleece' (judges 6:36-40)worked for him just as Abraham's decision to take his son to the mountain worked for him. They both ended up where they needed to be - in a position for the Lord to prove Himself to them.

Huh? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img] I am choosing not to engage you on this in this thread, but suffice it to say that the Old Testament and New Testament requirements as it pertains to how we practise faith are different things.

[/qb]

Feel free to open another one so we can explore it there. THe fact is, God chose to respond to Gideon because of what Gideon asked Him. Who am I to say if he was wrong?

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb]

Originally posted by (H)AnnA(H)

To categorically state that 'fleecing is not faith' is not statement I will make.

Under the new dispensation, we can. That however is a different subject altogether. [/qb]

We do not reserve the right to determine the strength of any one's faith. Hebrews 11, the Faith Chapter lists all these examples of persons in the old testament by name and deed: Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Isaac, Moses & his parents, Rahab.

The author in vs 32 conceded that he did not have time to give details about others : Gideon , Barak, Samson, Jepthta, David , Samuel & the prophets

When the Lord made the fleece wet, Gideon asked him if he could have one more request(Judges 6:39). Akin to Abraham's in Genesis 19:32 when he pleaded with God to save a city. Does this mean he had no faith? I think not.

Abraham is known as the father of faith and Gideon as the one who fleeced. The bottom line is that they both reached a level where they realised they needed God to come through for them.

And that I think is the essence of faith, realising that we cannot do it on our own and that we need the help of the Lord. From as 'great' a decision as who we marry to the 'minor' ones as to what colour car we buy.


" No one knows your relationship with the Lord like you do. Whatever works for you"

[tonirand]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by mountaingal:
[qb] thank you hannah, for that explanation. this is the first time i'm seeing this. i find it interesting that it is a concept used by MEN when talking about selecting a mate. could it be that Christian men see relationships as some kind of battle they are getting themselves in? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [/qb]

[img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]
You would be surprised to know how many persons fleece [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

A minister to our church once told us that he had decided not to marry unless the woman 'fell into his lap'

He was in church one Sunday in the front row and the speaker for the day opened his Bible on the podium. A photo of his daughter fell out into the gentleman's lap.

Sometime later he met a lady he was intersetdd in and they begun dating. When she took him to meet her parents, he found out that that her father was the minister who had visited his church. She was their only daughter and her father always carried her graduation photo in his Bible!

Mi not saying he was right or wrong. Mi nuh tink mi wudda do dat but mi is not him.

To Fleece or not to fleece, that is the question. DWL [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[britisha]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb]

Originally posted by Dailybread:
[qb]

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb]True enough, but the people still had to go out and gather it themselves [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [/qb]

Nodding in agreement! Could it be a teaching problem in various doctrins [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img] [/qb]

Yes, I do think it is. I recall not that long ago a Christian female telling me she had to go pray about what color car to buy I mean, does God really care about the color of one's car??? You would be surprised at how much some people spiritualize their lives. [/qb]

This should go down as the "post" of the week. *LOL*~~~Waiee~~~ I've heard it all.

Carry on.

[jedi]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb]

Originally posted by Jedi:
Gawd please help dese poh christian females, and in due time draw di rite man into their paths, preferably ones who can open them mout and tell a ooman seh im like har, radda dan she haffee goh compromise har integrity by lookin desparate and runnin im dung all ovah di place. Den nex ting yuh kno im goh seh she a stawk im inna di house of di Lerd. Fawda yuh see di dilemma of some Christian omenses do lawd hasten to help dem.

Amen.

(tawk bout beatin a dead horse to death) [/qb]

You are a trip [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] You have missed the point altogether and I do find it interesting that in the day of gender equality, women's rights and whatever else, that for a female to sit back and wait to be approached is regarded as lady-like. To suggest that a female who approaches someone she may be interested in is compromising her integrity is laughable. Desperation and stalking are not gender specific, and a man could just as easily be regarded as being both. In a lot of ways you have basically validated the general observations. [/QB]

First of all wasn't it just the other day Queen posted a thread about women in the church. And Heverybaddi agreed that these women were too desperate, and blah, blah, blah. Now here you come with this thread saying as how most Christian women don't have their act together and they need to go out and approach men etc. blah , blah, blah. Now tell me that I am a bit kanfused or something. What are Christian women really supposed to be doing?
For on the one hand she is seen as too aggressive and presumptious and then on the other too docile and laid back. Christian or not all black women are faced with the same delemma which I believe has not one darn thing to do with Christianity but more with upbringing, and living in a society that has double standards where women are concerned. I don't care how well broadcast the equality thing is, it is not welcomed everywhere and in all circles. America is still very prudish when it comes to matters of men and women. Then lets not even talk about our black men and their lack of responsibility.

And I beg your pardon it is never seen as desperation for a man to approach a woman, but I don't care what anyone says a woman is still looked on as overly aggressive if she approaches a man and quite likely even by the same man that she approaches. All this talk is cheap but again upbringing and a society that taught its sons and daughter differently still dictates, what is correct behavior for a woman and a man. And don't forget that there is always that chance, yes that slim chance that the woman who even manages to get past introduction to dating may be expected to go the extra mile, because she saw fit to break down an age old barrier. And yes Christian men are no different than non-Christians in that arena, after -all he may just get lucky and find the one "Christian" woman who doesn't mind compromising her standards.

[Diplomat]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Jedi: As said earlier, you have totally missed the point [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img]

[jedi]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by CEW:
[qb] Jedi: As said earlier, you have totally missed the point [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [/qb]

How smug! No I don't think so CEW, you have insulted Christian women with what you have said and what you have said does not stand up to closer scrutiny because it is a generalization made perhaps through biased eyes, for instance look at what you said -: In a casual conversation with some other Christain guys, it was interesting to see how many were attracted to a non-christian female then you hasten to say (though they had no intentions of dating them). That to me is a lot of hooey. If a group of men are sitting around comparing non-Christian women to Christian women, and saying that the non-Christian has her act together better than the sister there is no telling what possible motivational forces might have been at play in bringing about this kind of conclusion. In other words I am taking this back to the source where it came from, a group of men sitting around comparing one type of woman to another. Coming from a man I am not even the least surprised that this would be your (collective) conclusion. Tell me, do you find that non-Christian women dress better too? Are they also easier to date and talk to? Or is it that Christian women require too much work?
CEW that is the type of chat that happens prerequisite to trouble.

I stand firmly on what I say about a double standard for all women, not just Christian women, worse yet black Christian women. But in no wise is the black Christian woman laid back about getting her business done, I don't know who you associate with or if that is true for Black Canadian Christian women but that sort of statement is totally out of place here. You have got to be kidding it has been the black Christian woman who has brought up her family, bought houses and land and sent her children to school -in the absence of idlers standing around watching fracktail- that has been the backbone of our race. Do you really realize what you have said in those three paragraphs. I am most indignant that you should be so insensitive and callous. Truth be told the black woman no matter what or how hard she strives is still at a disadvantage even among her own men, case in point you and your friends.

But you know what perhaps you can encourage all the black men you know in your circle to take a different attitude towards your Christian sisters. Help the sisters out by encouraging these men to approach them, instead of expecting the sisters to approach you. You know maybe, just maybe it could very well be that mama's teaching bout approaching men done stuck in the sister's head and no 'mount a societal changes going to break that. So how about giving the sister a hand and asking her out, that might even help to bolster her self-confidence. Go ahead have a heart for your Christian sisters, the load is heavy that they have to carry. Remember they carry the cross of Christ which has many requirements not to mention the burden of their gender coupled with the color of their skin.

[britisha]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

I just knew it. I just knew it! The board err forum was peaceful for too long. Here we go again. Jeeeze!!

[britisha]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

CEW some, most people tend to see the world from THEIR perspective!! Cyaan blame dem.

[mountaingal]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by Jedi:
[qb] I stand firmly on what I say about a double standard for all women, not just Christian women, worse yet black Christian women. But in no wise is the black Christian woman laid back about getting her business done, I don't know who you associate with or if that is true for Black Canadian Christian women but that sort of statement is totally out of place here. You have got to be kidding it has been the black Christian woman who has brought up her family, bought houses and land and sent her children to school -in the absence of idlers standing around watching fracktail- that has been the backbone of our race. Do you really realize what you have said in those three paragraphs. I am most indignant that you should be so insensitive and callous. Truth be told the black woman no matter what or how hard she strives is still at a disadvantage even among her own men, case in point you and your friends.
[/qb]

I think there's something in this, and is what kind of niggled at the back of my mind from the original post.

some Christian females who seem to have a "leave everything in God's hand" approach that suggests an abdication of responsibility for doing their part in the accomplishment of any goals and objectives.

even with the qualifier "some", it seemed an unfair statement to make - perhaps because i cannot imagine a Christian woman or man living their life as such that they are not daily involved in the planning and achieving of life goals (unless we're talking about someone with mental or deeply emotional issues).

really, what's called "leave everything in God's hand", when applied to a non-Christian situation simply means a person is focussing on what they can do. In other words, non-Christian women also have their version of "leaving things in God's hands," of not expending unnecessary energy on things they cannot (for the moment perhaps) control.

So, really, in the original scenario, what i see is an example of "maybe the grass is greener on the other side" syndrome. these Christian guys are projecting something onto non-Christian women to justify their desire for such women.

[Diplomat]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by britisha:
[qb] CEW some, most people tend to see the world from THEIR perspective!! Cyaan blame dem. [/qb]

I totally agree...

[Diplomat]

Re: The Christian Guy and Non-Christian Females...

Originally posted by mountaingal:

some Christian females who seem to have a "leave everything in God's hand" approach that suggests an abdication of responsibility for doing their part in the accomplishment of any goals and objectives.

even with the qualifier "some", it seemed an unfair statement to make - perhaps because i cannot imagine a Christian woman or man living their life as such that they are not daily involved in the planning and achieving of life goals (unless we're talking about someone with mental or deeply emotional issues).

You would be surprised at how wrong you are.

really, what's called "leave everything in God's hand", when applied to a non-Christian situation simply means a person is focussing on what they can do. In other words, non-Christian women also have their version of "leaving things in God's hands," of not expending unnecessary energy on things they cannot (for the moment perhaps) control.

We are talking about two different things.

So, really, in the original scenario, what i see is an example of "maybe the grass is greener on the other side" syndrome. these Christian guys are projecting something onto non-Christian women to justify their desire for such women.

A matter of perspective with which I disagree. As stated at the onset, none of the Christian males mentioned had any desire to be with / date the non-Christian they admired.