women traveling in jamaica

[Pippi]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Hi everyone!

Wow! I, uh, really wished that I had read this bulletin board before I went to Jamaica three weeks ago. I really could have been a bit better prepared than I was.

I went to Ja with one of my girlfriends with no prior knowledge that the 'gigolo' thing existed. I had been told jokingly that there was an abundance but was not quite so prepared for it. I went to Ja for some sun and relaxation - nothing more.

Day one of my trip I spotted this beautiful man that worked on the beach. I observed him for a few days and he kept to himself and didn't talk or bother anyone. Several days later I picked up some conversations with him and we spent most of my remaining time together. He was very sweet and kind. Never asked for money nor did I ever give him money. He calls me several times a week (sometimes a day) just to hear my voice.

I'm sitting here waiting for the shoe to drop - especially after reading the Gigolo diary. Are there any tried and trued giveaways to screen him out? I know that this is really impossible to do but any advice would be really appreciated.

Respect,
Pippi

[[email protected]]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Time will tell, Pippi. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

[Tiger Eye]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Originally posted by Pippi:
[qb] Are there any tried and trued giveaways to screen him out? I know that this is really impossible to do but any advice would be really appreciated.[/qb]

i would say this isnt impossible at all but you must be patient because chances are you cant go to jamaica very often or spend a considerable amount of time there. i would get to know him over several trips before taking it further. no matter where you are in the world, people's true colors come out eventually. getting to know anyone takes time and most of us dont have a hell of a lot of time in jamaica...on message boards about jamaica, yes, but IN jamaica, no. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

ive learned that i dont do anything in the beginning that i dont want to be expected to do over the course of the relationship. i.e. pay for him, send money, or bring a suitcase full of presents....(2 CDs, a few lighters, and a shirt..period.) and yes, i will come out my face and ask where my present is. i dont expect much -- go pick some of those beautiful tropical flowers-- is he is the only one that celebrates birthdays and christmas???

someone a few posts up said that you should treat people how you want to be treated...yeah, that looks good on paper but i have learned the hard way - I treat ME the way i want people to treat ME! cuz other than my mama, i havent met too many people that have. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[Marilyn]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Rizla
I am wildly applauding. Girl if you did notjust hit up on my feelings EXACTLY. If me and mine did not have this VERY argument on the phone just the other day!!!!! Flower thing, birthday and all. Wow that's scarry.

[Marilyn]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Rizla
I am wildly applauding. Girl if you did notjust hit up on my feelings EXACTLY. If me and mine did not have this VERY argument on the phone just the other day!!!!! Flower thing, birthday and all. Wow that's scarry.

[Bink - the Only]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

allow me to quote from my favorite jamaican tourist book "Jamaica - A Visitor's Guide" by Harry S. Pariser

"One good way to rid yourself of trouble is to say your boyfriend is meeting you back at the hotel. If they know you are alone, they will go everywhere with you! Of course, if you really don't want to be hassled PERIOD, the best thing to do would be to shave your head, get heavily tattooed and pierced, wear Doc Martins (kicking them into the air at intervals) and don "Lesbian Power" buttons!"

all said tongue in cheek. but, then this is the guy who also coined the term "rastaphonian".

[[email protected]]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Originally posted by Rizla:
[qb]

Originally posted by Pippi:
[qb] Are there any tried and trued giveaways to screen him out? I know that this is really impossible to do but any advice would be really appreciated.[/qb]

i would say this isnt impossible at all but you must be patient because chances are you cant go to jamaica very often or spend a considerable amount of time there. i would get to know him over several trips before taking it further. no matter where you are in the world, people's true colors come out eventually. getting to know anyone takes time and most of us dont have a hell of a lot of time in jamaica...on message boards about jamaica, yes, but IN jamaica, no. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

ive learned that i dont do anything in the beginning that i dont want to be expected to do over the course of the relationship. i.e. pay for him, send money, or bring a suitcase full of presents....(2 CDs, a few lighters, and a shirt..period.) and yes, i will come out my face and ask where my present is. i dont expect much -- go pick some of those beautiful tropical flowers-- is he is the only one that celebrates birthdays and christmas???

someone a few posts up said that you should treat people how you want to be treated...yeah, that looks good on paper but i have learned the hard way - I treat ME the way i want people to treat ME! cuz other than my mama, i havent met too many people that have. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [/qb]

Rizla, you have said a mouth full: [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] Don't start anything you don't want to finish!!!

[margarita39]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

I've been reading this thread for a while, and figured about time I chimed in.

Just returning from my first trip from JA, Negril much less, I must say.. oh yeah.. Negril beach boys, you got'm pegged. This thread is very informative, but I can't say that its something you don't figure out as soon as you get there on your own. I both do and don't wish that I've read it before I went.

Look... you have incredibly hot men on the beach (or in clubs) hitting on you (and I mean HOT MEN!), ALL the time...everywhere.. you are the best dressed, the best looking, the best dancer, they fell in love from the moment they saw you, they can't believe you don't have a boyfriend, they'll show you around.. etc etc. It doesn't take a genious to figure out some of it is smoke (anywhere, doesn't have to be JA), but also, once you figure out to take it with a little grain of salt, WHAT'S WRONG WITH ENJOYING IT? Most people probably don't get that much attention (from such gorgeous ppl [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] ) back home, and I certainly haven't been propositioined in my entire life as many times as I've been in a couple of weeks in Jamaica, but again, what the hell is wrong with that? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img] You don't actually HAVE to "party" with them you know. If you aren't intersted you can say thank you and that you are flattered but no.

One thing that I absolutely loved about the "Negril men" is that while, yes, they were agressive, they also had manners! That's not such an easy find in agressive men usually. The most of the agressive men backed away if I told them I wasn't instrested. For example, this Rasta was just going circles around me trying to get me to dance with him, I eventually said, "OK, one dance".. and he acted like it was a godsend. And you know what, after that one dance he left me alone. All I got from him from there on was smiles and nods when I saw him in other places.

No one grabbed me that I didn't want to, and about half way through the trip, I made a discovery. Don't make eye contact with people, and they won't bother you at all! I guess that would apply anywhere really. Every night I went out, I met just TONS of people, and had TONS of people asking me to dance and all that jazz, but on the last few nights there I didn't want to dance or talk with anyone that I didn't know and I was almost dreading going to a club... But ya know, I went to a club, sat there and purposely did not make eye contact with anyone but the performers (veeeery difficult for me to do), but I was left alone. Only one person came by, and I said I just wanted to chill and he was cool with it and just smiled.

Overall, I think Jamaican men are just too damn nice. Yeah, on the surface they may seem agressive and giggolos and after only one thing, but there are some beautiful people underneath that "tourist food" front. And if you treat them just like regular people, I found that they'll give you respect back.

One last thing - I LOVE this thread. It did put some things in perspective for me.

One Love

[trelawnysmall]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Originally posted by vivien:
I sent the money because I know he needs it, and I could afford to do it.

I am sure he IS NOT A PLAYER.

please dont take offense to this question, but how old are you? [img]/forums/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

My friends here in the UK think I am crazy ! yes I am - in love. Perhaps it simply is all about telling him my life story and someone still cared for me ? Not that I have ever done anything wrong.

I would sell up here and move to Mo Bay next week.

I live in Mo Bay, maybe I know this 'great' guy. Again, how old are you?

I don't think he would like it here as it has not stopped raining since I've been back !

all I can say Vivien, is please be sure to come back to Mo Bay to see this mr. wonderful as often as possible. YOU need him & HE needs you? Did I ask your age?

Have a great life!!! [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

Vivien[/qb]

[Guest]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Hi Boundbrook,
I agree with you, however, I was in a situation where he would not leave... they will stick onto you like glue, escort you to lunch, etc.... It's hard to get rid of them. I once had to make the excuse of going to the ladies room, and then slip out the other end and hailed a taxi. I vowed never to take a vacation in JA again after that experience.

[Guest]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

TRELAWNYSMALL

............. Thank you so much ........ I have only just stopped laughing ......... [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img] I've got it bad ....... Only when I saw the quotes did it dawn on me that I am acting like teenager. Thanks for pointing it out.

I am planning a trip to Mo Bay for New Year, ALONE !!!!

Vivien

[Tiger Eye]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Originally posted by bink:
[qb]
"Of course, if you really don't want to be hassled PERIOD, the best thing to do would be to shave your head, get heavily tattooed and pierced, wear Doc Martins (kicking them into the air at intervals) and don "Lesbian Power" buttons!"[/qb]

i disagreed with sienna above regarding telling a jamaican man i have AIDS in order to deter unwanted attention. i was also tempted to add that i wouldnt lie about being gay as well but refrained from doing so since sienna never suggested that. now that you have, bink, i will take the opportunity to respectfully disagree again...culturally we are worlds apart on the issue of alternative lifestyles and since they dont play when it comes to this, i dont either.

[sunshinechic2002]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

[ all I can say Vivien, is please be sure to come back to Mo Bay to see this mr. wonderful as often as possible. YOU need him & HE needs you? Did I ask your age?

Have a great life!!! [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

Vivien[/qb][/QUOTE][/QB][/QUOTE]

TRELAWNYSMALL,
We all know that TOURISM is Jamaica's biggest industry, however, that does not make it impossible for people to fall in love--it happens all over the world, ya know.

Three weeks after I got back from Ja I was in the mall and struck up a conversation with a young lady who had met a guy from Isreal while on vacation at the Jersey shore and they ended up falling in love and our stories were not that different. People are people all over the world.

All I am asking is that you stop trying to make women feel stupid for doing what they were put on this earth to do and that is to LOVE. It is also a little far fetched to ask women who are blessed enough to afford a trip to Ja to not be in shock when they get there and see a vision that is the total OPPOSITE of all of the stupid, nasty stereotypes that they are used to hearing at home. I know that is what happened in my case, so I am only speaking for myself. I am just feeling for Vivien because I know where she is emotionally right now because I was just there a few weeks ago. The feeling is so strong and so good that for a while there I was wondering if someone had slipped me a little something because I know I didn't smoke anything while I was there. I actually felt "high" for a month after I returned. I felt much better after I stumbled across this message board and found out that there are a whole lot of other women who fall in love with Ja and its people, too.

So don't be so sarcastic when inviting people to come back "home" and start using some of that Ja sweetness and hospitality that you were born with. [img]/forums/images/graemlins/wink.gif[/img] [img]/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

PEACE

[Ochigal]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Uhhh...sunshinechic...

Maybe you need to look into who Trelawnysmall is...she is not a jamaica...she is an american NOW married to a Jamaican...so I do not beleive she was being sarcastic. She truley does understand the LOVE you talk about.

[sunshinechic2002]

Re: women traveling in jamaica

Oops...I didn't realize...

Sorry Trelawnysmall!!