<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: MrsRoyal</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Jazz suppose the hubby is yu friend to? </div></div>
most time people come to you through other people - mi nuh count fren of fren as my fren...
but if by chance - say I knew them both in high school or something and they end up together... I would have to be cast into that situation to make a decision - cause anybody cheating on MY fren an mi know - mi ah go tell dem... but it is rarely that both are gonna be your friend equally.
most time people come to you through other people - mi nuh count fren of fren as my fren...
but if by chance - say I knew them both in high school or something and they end up together... I would have to be cast into that situation to make a decision - cause anybody cheating on MY fren an mi know - mi ah go tell dem... but it is rarely that both are gonna be your friend equally. </div></div>
In my case they were/are both my friends (she more yes) but he is a good friend too. We are god parents to each others kids. The thing is I had to just really be there for both when they needed to vent and when they asked for my opinion I gave them and when they needed a shoulder I gave them..
Now they are still married with 3 kids [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/bannana_purple.gif[/img] happy
Neutry - u mek mi blush [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/blush.gif[/img]
but I really think it boils down to the level of friendship.
I have had to remove one of my friends forcefully from her marital home - cause de bway did ah abuse har... an wen mi walk go een deh wid some ah mi "boys" - u waan si de likle maama man ah try talk to mi (cause mi tolerate him for her sake im mussi did tink we ah fren)
mi jus tell him fe move from in front ah mi an nuh chat to mi - cause mi an him ah needa fren nor buddy...
but wen it come to who mi call "FRIEND" i take that very seriously and I don't hand it out lightly.
My friends are people I have known since birth or shortly thereafter and if de body need fe bury... I got the shovel!
I hear you Natty Dread Girl - and one of the beautiful things abotu true friendship is that you can be honest and brutal an dem know dthat you still love them and will still be there for them. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70409-waytogo.gif[/img]
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: BoundBrook</div><div class="ubbcode-body">[
I am trying hard not to be judgemental in all of this. I really don't care that she is having an affair, more that she is making, what I think are (there is my judgement creeping in), bad decisions as a result.
I guess I need to just stand by her side through all of this.
</div></div>
See the thing is - YOU think it;s a bad decision for her - suppose she go down there and live happily ever after with this guy? it could happen you know...
not all marriages work out, maybe hers isn;t...
I agree she should at least be honest with him before she does all this - but I guess everybody handles thigns differently...
I know u care about her and thats why u want to stop her from makign what you think is a mistake - but heck - life is abotu making mistakes and learnign from them -and it sure helps to have a friend to hug you and tell you that you really arent; that stupid, and help you get over it. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70409-waytogo.gif[/img]
I guess I should say that I am really only friends with the husband through his wife. I don't even really care for him. He isn't a terrible guy but he did something once, out of the pretense of loving his wife so much he couldn't help himself...
The day my best friend celebrated her 30th birthday a few years ago I was sick as a dog and unable to make the party. I called her and we talked about getting together another time when I was feeling better.
A few hours later I get a phone call from her husband trying to guilt trip me into attending the party, if not dinner and drinks, than the night club afterwards. He said all kinds of foolishness like she would never miss something as important as my 30th party no matter how sick she was. [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/rolleyes.gif[/img] That phone call came out of nowhere, it was like he was way to comfortable with me to talk to me like that. I hung up on him not only b/c I couldn't believe he was calling me and talking to me like that but also b/c I was sick and had to run to the toilet.
From that day I haven't really liked him. I don't even know if his wife knows he did that.
...because in the end, people always do what they want to do.
You never know Boundie, this really might be the best thing to ever happen to her. Sensible or not. She need to find her own way and make her own happiness.
My cousin/good friend left her husband for a man she met when they moved out west with his job. She & the husband had 2 kids together.
She had only known the new guy a short time. But they ended up having my godchild moving back east and have been happily married for over 20 years.
Her ex-husband went on to meet the perfect woman for him, they had 2 more kids together and everyone is living happily ever after.
Be her friend. The husband is her problem, not yours.
And he should know better than to look to you to out your friend.
He needs to ASK HIS WIFE. If he thinks she'll lie to him then he already doesn't trust her.
You don't have to encourage what she does, state your opinion and let her know that you are her friend no matter what she decides.
Boundie...all mi haffi seh is dat in di best interest of your sanity you just mek sure you keep out of them business... [img]/forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/70388-shameonyou.gif[/img]
She came here last night, with 3 bags, the bags she plans to carry to Mexico with her. Her husband has no idea she is even leaving him. She has not called him or talked to him at all and she is leaving tomorrow. They found a house to rent in Acapulco. I had to bring Red up to speed last night on the whole thing b/c he had no idea what was going on.
I am sure since she didn't go home last night her hubby will be calling/e-mailing all over creation looking for her today. I don't think he knows where my new house is. She feels like he won't/can't physically come here looking for her, that way she can just make a clean break tomorrow.
It is strange. I don't know this person in my house right now. She is still my closest and bestest friend but it is like someone else is living in her little 4'9'' frame. I am so sad to see her move away but am hoping for the best for her.
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