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Re: For Some Single Ladies
This is all well said Accepted. Two points.
1. It is just as frustrating for a woman to be constantly relegated to the "just friends" pile by so-called Christian men and then see them go after really worldly women (i.e. skimpy clothing, weaves, tons of make up).
2. The brother in the story at the beginning of this thread did nothing wrong but so many men in the church play games and take advantage of the fact that there are women in abundance. This is not fair.
The root cause of these problems is that there is a shortage of Black men in so many churches. We have had other threads that have explored the reasons for this. Men of other races in North America, particularly so called Christian men for some reason, don't typically date Black women. We are constantly given the message date only Christians (in accordance with Biblical standards). So, yes, there will be many lonely sisters. The desire to be loved, to be married and have children is natural and normal. In fact, without these desires, the human race would have died out long ago.
As a footnote to this discussion, I would like to mention that I recently returned from Paris and found that there was a much wider range of pairings. I found a ton of Black couples every where I went. I also found a lot of Black women with White men, Black men with White women and just about every combination you can think of. Now mind you, this wasn't in a church setting but it was a marked contrast to what I see both in and out of the church when I move around the greater Toronto area. You might find less of this desperate naming and claiming if there were more Black men in the church and if men of all races truly followed the Bible and judged women by their internal beauty rather than their degree of conformity to some ideal manufactured in the fantasy factories of Hollywood and Madison Avenue.
When I recently visited the Louvre and looked at the works of art and images of women and men who were considered to be beautiful through the ages (everything from Egyptian, Greek and Roman art to European art of from the 14th to 19th centuries), I found little that resembled the images that grace the pages of our magazines and leap across our TV screens in North America. Might start a thread on this very topic the the Music and Art section.
I am going to steal Mutty's line here for a moment, one of the most frustrating things for a christian brother is to be that of a friend, 'friends' most times are the nice men that finish last.
In all women lie a seducer that most try their best to supress, she is awed by the animal desire a man shows for her, in Songs of Solomon this woman speaks out.
Most christian women struggle with this they want a man as romantic as any poster soap opera hulk but also want a man whose leadership qualities in the church are pronounced.
This duplicity can destroy the testimony of a lot of men because the women do not realise the pressure single men are under to supress the nature of the "callous", a christian man must deny this nature to remain 'a man after God's own heart' and unlike a woman this nature can overwhelm him at any time. He must guard well his words as well as his heart.
Men are more physical than emotional in any relationship, we do not build fantasies about the future, we are in the main part pragmatic, we see something we want we go after it if the signals are right we persue, if the signals are wrong we move on. Well most do.
When a christian brother says no, he is for the most part straight up, in a church with an overabundance of females who as christians must wait till marriage to express their hidden desires, its is not wise to put on an act or act too foward. You will be misunderstood
In all women lie a seducer that most try their best to supress, she is awed by the animal desire a man shows for her, in Songs of Solomon this woman speaks out.
Most christian women struggle with this they want a man as romantic as any poster soap opera hulk but also want a man whose leadership qualities in the church are pronounced.
This duplicity can destroy the testimony of a lot of men because the women do not realise the pressure single men are under to supress the nature of the "callous", a christian man must deny this nature to remain 'a man after God's own heart' and unlike a woman this nature can overwhelm him at any time. He must guard well his words as well as his heart.
Men are more physical than emotional in any relationship, we do not build fantasies about the future, we are in the main part pragmatic, we see something we want we go after it if the signals are right we persue, if the signals are wrong we move on. Well most do.
When a christian brother says no, he is for the most part straight up, in a church with an overabundance of females who as christians must wait till marriage to express their hidden desires, its is not wise to put on an act or act too foward. You will be misunderstood
1. It is just as frustrating for a woman to be constantly relegated to the "just friends" pile by so-called Christian men and then see them go after really worldly women (i.e. skimpy clothing, weaves, tons of make up).
2. The brother in the story at the beginning of this thread did nothing wrong but so many men in the church play games and take advantage of the fact that there are women in abundance. This is not fair.
The root cause of these problems is that there is a shortage of Black men in so many churches. We have had other threads that have explored the reasons for this. Men of other races in North America, particularly so called Christian men for some reason, don't typically date Black women. We are constantly given the message date only Christians (in accordance with Biblical standards). So, yes, there will be many lonely sisters. The desire to be loved, to be married and have children is natural and normal. In fact, without these desires, the human race would have died out long ago.
As a footnote to this discussion, I would like to mention that I recently returned from Paris and found that there was a much wider range of pairings. I found a ton of Black couples every where I went. I also found a lot of Black women with White men, Black men with White women and just about every combination you can think of. Now mind you, this wasn't in a church setting but it was a marked contrast to what I see both in and out of the church when I move around the greater Toronto area. You might find less of this desperate naming and claiming if there were more Black men in the church and if men of all races truly followed the Bible and judged women by their internal beauty rather than their degree of conformity to some ideal manufactured in the fantasy factories of Hollywood and Madison Avenue.
When I recently visited the Louvre and looked at the works of art and images of women and men who were considered to be beautiful through the ages (everything from Egyptian, Greek and Roman art to European art of from the 14th to 19th centuries), I found little that resembled the images that grace the pages of our magazines and leap across our TV screens in North America. Might start a thread on this very topic the the Music and Art section.
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